It's all about me

[Replaced_Texan]

I was excavating some files last night deep in my desk at home last night, and I found a folder of crap from college. It had ticket stubs and party flyers and stuff that was supposed to remind me of the best years of my life, but now, of course, I have no real memory of them.

Anyhow, I found a few bumper stickers in the folder, and I did remember those. They were given to me by worried family members when I first went away to school. I think they thought that my going to school 1500 miles away would make me forget my roots. One was the ubiquitous "Don't Mess With Texas" sticker. Another said "Native Texan." And the third said "Displaced Texan."

I probably hadn't looked at that damned bumper sticker since it was given to me, er, more than ten years ago. Who knew it'd end up being my name?

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I was excavating some files last night deep in my desk at home last night, and I found a folder of crap from college. It had ticket stubs and party flyers and stuff that was supposed to remind me of the best years of my life, but now, of course, I have no real memory of them.

Anyhow, I found a few bumper stickers in the folder, and I did remember those. They were given to me by worried family members when I first went away to school. I think they thought that my going to school 1500 miles away would make me forget my roots. One was the ubiquitous "Don't Mess With Texas" sticker. Another said "Native Texan." And the third said "Displaced Texan."

I probably hadn't looked at that damned bumper sticker since it was given to me, er, more than ten years ago. Who knew it'd end up being my name?

This weekend I unpacked the last of my boxes in my office (I moved last September, whoops). This was the box with the "Str8's past" stuff -- old newspaper clippings, reference letters, college application essays, and most importantly, photos of ex-girlfriends and letters from same. This time, I was able to fight off the urge to phone/e-mail/mail them. I also put them in a place that my wife is unlikely to look for them. She knows I keep this crap, she just doesn't want to stumble across them.

Anyways, RT, my reaction this time was one of wondering about the choices I've made that have led me to where I now find myself, and wondering where various people were now and what they were doing with their lives, but this was mostly unaccompanied by disappointment or regret (as opposed to the last few times I've looked over this stuff). How did you feel going over your old keepsakes?

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
But do you like direct stimulation? Or rubbing circles around the general clitoral area/hood? And how much pressure? Because, you know, this knowledge might come in handy someday.

I meant to mention when the link was first posted: A friend of mine is a sociology professor at Texas A&M and one of her first lectures of the year in the Intro class is sociocultural history of the clitoris. I think she does it to get her class size down. I think she's incorporated South Park references into the lecture nowadays.

She's always asking me if I want to be a guest presenter at that lecture. I'll be sure to pass on this new material for her.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
This weekend I unpacked the last of my boxes in my office (I moved last September, whoops). This was the box with the "Str8's past" stuff -- old newspaper clippings, reference letters, college application essays, and most importantly, photos of ex-girlfriends and letters from same. This time, I was able to fight off the urge to phone/e-mail/mail them. I also put them in a place that my wife is unlikely to look for them. She knows I keep this crap, she just doesn't want to stumble across them.

Anyways, RT, my reaction this time was one of wondering about the choices I've made that have led me to where I now find myself, and wondering where various people were now and what they were doing with their lives, but this was mostly unaccompanied by disappointment or regret (as opposed to the last few times I've looked over this stuff). How did you feel going over your old keepsakes?

I dunno. When I walk to the wall and feel the locks of hair, and see the pictures taken with the telephoto lens, the angry and fearful letters, the court orders -- I get a warm, tingly feeling, but it fades quickly.

[Dualit]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
"I wouldn't urinate down his throat if his heart was on fire."

--Democratic consultant James Carville, referring to independent presidential candidate Ralph Nader during a speech before the Michigan delegation today.

Carville is just ripping off Bette Davis, who said about Joan Crawford (post-BABY JANE), "I wouldn't piss on her if she were on fire." Needless to say, they didn't like each other. This, and other interesting Davis/Crawford stories, can be found in THE DIVINE FEUD.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Anyways, RT, my reaction this time was one of wondering about the choices I've made that have led me to where I now find myself, and wondering where various people were now and what they were doing with their lives, but this was mostly unaccompanied by disappointment or regret (as opposed to the last few times I've looked over this stuff). How did you feel going over your old keepsakes?

I ended throwing out a lot of crap. The whole thing was started because I couldn't find a remote control for a stereo component that I recently moved, and it turned into a cleaning frenzy. I think I ended up throwing out something like 40 video tapes, a lot of invitations to events I never went to, some notes from law school, some directories that are probably ten years out-dated, and some christmas cards that had no accompanying notes. Usually these cleaning projects take forever, because I start lingering over the crap, but for whatever reason, I didn't really get nostalgic over that much, and it wasn't a big deal to throw things away. I think I finally realized that my hauling a lot of this crap from one house to another just makes moving that much more of a pain in the ass.

Sort of related, but unrelated to the cleaning, I did end up writing four or five e-mails last week to friends I'd lost touch with. I got one response, and I'm glad that I contacted her.

[LessinSF]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Please PM me

See you there, schmoopie.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Not Bob
It's a variation of the line "he's so mean, he wouldn't piss in your ear if your brain was on fire" that (I think) Molly Ivins used about an Attorney General of Texas a few years ago.

My personal favorite version, used to refer to current boss almost daily, is: I wouldn't cross the street to piss on him if his head was on fire.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I meant to mention when the link was first posted: A friend of mine is a sociology professor at Texas A&M and one of her first lectures of the year in the Intro class is sociocultural history of the clitoris. I think she does it to get her class size down. I think she's incorporated South Park references into the lecture nowadays.

She's always asking me if I want to be a guest presenter at that lecture. I'll be sure to pass on this new material for her.

One of the female psych profs at my college used to wear a t-shirt with "clitoris" printed on it. I told her I thought of her as more than that.

Originally posted by LessinSF
See you there, schmoopie.

Where?

[LessinSF]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Where?

I don't yet know where our camp will be.

[SlaveNoMore]

paigowprincess
Burning Man?

Lessinsf
See you there, schmoopie

paigowprincess
Where?

Lessinsf
I don't yet know where our camp will be.

Please make it the remotest possible part of the desert.

Otherwise, I fear for the future of mankind if and when this fucking trainwreck should occur

[LessinSF]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Please make it the remotest possible part of the desert.

Otherwise, I fear for the future of mankind if and when this fucking trainwreck should occur

That shroom cloud is kinda what the actual Burning Man looks like on shrooms. Paigs, will you get me some?

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Please make it the remotest possible part of the desert.

Otherwise, I fear for the future of mankind if and when this fucking trainwreck should occur

Jealous much, my unfeathered friend? But not to worry. The only way Less and I are hooking up at this thing is if I suddently get so hot and parched that I have the choice of dropping dead or drinking from the oasis of Lester's fountain of spewing spittle. And even then, its a tough call. Note to self. Bring much water.

[evenodds]

Let's see: fucking . . . trainwreck . . .

sounds like ACL time is getting close.