Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03 - Page 1490

purse junkie · 09-10-2003, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
So when does the death pool start for these two?link

You cruel, heartless cynic. I am one hundred percent certain that Ben and JLo's sacred union will last for their entire lives in a perfect convergence of joy, oneness, devotion, and love. Just like her last two marriages.

Atticus Grinch · 09-10-2003, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dtb
With the birth of my first, when the delivery nurse said to my husband -- "look, the head is coming out," despite my utter exhaustion, I bolted upright (22 hours of labor can really take a toll on your energy level) and said "NO!! He's not allowed to look!!!" Even if I hadn't done that, hubby had been schooled on the prohibition against looking, so he was saying, "uh, I'm not allowed" just as I was bolting upright.

Gentlemen, I think we have located the Ark of the Covenant.

dtb · 09-10-2003, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
I think it's neat.
But then I used to help animals give birth so that's what I am reminded of. I really do think it's quite miraculous.

Somehow, I'm not grossed out at all by the birth of animals -- I've seen cows, horses and dogs giving birth (and loads of other animals on "Discovery Channel" type programs.) But human deliveries give me the willies.

(Which reminds me -- over the weekend, I met the woman who is the "female voice" of the Discovery Channel -- I wonder how you get that job?)

09-10-2003, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
What part of AP did it for you? The threesome with the two hookers he ends up killing with a nail gun? Or when he makes his girlfriend eat the urinal cake covered in chocolate?

str(big Bret Easton Ellis fan myself, seriously)8

It was his rituals. Like the peeling of the mask in the morning and the whole grooming process. And his explanations of the Huey Lewis and Phil Collins oeuvres. And how he got so angry about the other guys business card.

robustpuppy · 09-10-2003, 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dtb
(Which reminds me -- over the weekend, I met the woman who is the "female voice" of the Discovery Channel -- I wonder how you get that job?)

Did you find her voice familiar, or did you learn about her job some other way?

purse junkie · 09-10-2003, 02:10 PM

So watch out for your daughters:

http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/meast/....ap/index.html

NotFromHere · 09-10-2003, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dtb
but then, hidden in there (in manner of crouching tiger...) are a bunch of graphic delivery room photos -- and mom isn't even wearing one of those hospital gowns -- good GOD! Photo albums like that ought to have warning labels (as one sometimes finds on record albums or similar).

Warning labels are a good idea. But then again, good sense is a good idea. Photos of your crotch? Really? Do people really think you want to see their crotch?
I don't take pictures of my crotch and show them to people (breasticle day notwithstanding).
I can't imagine being in a situation where I would have to say to someone "AAAAGGGGHHHH, what the hell are you doing here? Are you trying to kill me? How about some warning? What are you thinking? What's wrong with you? Get me some more alcohol!"

Atticus Grinch · 09-10-2003, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
About three months ago, I was doing a puzzle with him and, for no apparent reason, he piped up "Sidd, I love you so much." (this was in his "call dad by his first name" phase). Hard not to melt over that.

That's precious. Just this morning, my two-year-old was running around the house gleefully shouting "Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit!" which was really darling because, against all possible odds and expectations, he picked up his first swear word from his mother.

(And that, brothers and sisters, is your Bilmoresque Post of the Day.)

str8outavannuys · 09-10-2003, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Hey Str8,
You just got back from Vegas, what the hell is Paigow poker?

Paigow Poker is a game where both you and the dealer are dealt seven cards. Both you and the dealer divide the seven cards into a "five card" hand and a "two card" hand. The only rule in doing so is that your five card hand must be able to beat your two card hand -- if you have one pair, you can't put it in your two card hand, because that would beat your "Ace high" five card hand.

You win if both of your hands beat both of the dealer's hands. You win 97.5% of your bet.
You lose if both of the dealer's hands beat both of your hands. You lose 100% of your bet.
You push if the result is a 1-1 tie. You get to keep 100% of your bet.

Decisions come when you have two pair, and have to decide to keep them together in your five card hand, or to split them up and put the big pair in your five card hand and the little pair in your two card hand. Other decisions come when you have a straight or a flush, with really bad other two cards, and choosing whether to keep the straight or flush together (which basically guarantees you a push), or turning it into a worse five card hand and a better two card hand, which in some cases gives you a chance of winning.

The term "Paigow" is synonymous with "Really Shitty." If you've got no ace, no pair, no straight, no flush, you've got paigow. Everyone always roots for the dealer to have paigow, so the whole table wins.

str(all your gambling questions answered)8

Shape Shifter · 09-10-2003, 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Maybe next we could talk about overweight people! Yay!

I am convinced that overweight (or "fat") people are behind the annoying practice of the office birthday "party." Who else would want birthday cake 50 times a year? I've always thought birthday celebrations were a little silly anyway. What your really saying is, "Congratulations. You were born and you haven't died yet." Why would I want to mark such a silly occasion with work "friends" while standing around uncomfortably around the giant cookie. Look, people, I'm not your friend, they pay me to be with you.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 09-10-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
You gotta appreciate the spread collars they all wear. We Americans can't dress for shit - the point collar is an abomination.

Yes, because we certainly need spread collars and big full-windsor knots on all the doughy american faces. That's looking sharp!

ltl/fb · 09-10-2003, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
I am convinced that overweight (or "fat") people are behind the annoying practice of the office birthday "party." Who else would want birthday cake 50 times a year? I've always thought birthday celebrations were a little silly anyway. What your really saying is, "Congratulations. You were born and you haven't died yet." Why would I want to mark such a silly occasion with work "friends" while standing around uncomfortably around the giant cookie. Look, people, I'm not your friend, they pay me to be with you.

Y'all get giant cookies? I love giant cookies. With the frosting, of course. We never get giant cookies. Maybe for my next birthday I will a frosted giant cookie.

robustpuppy · 09-10-2003, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Why would I want to mark such a silly occasion with work "friends" while standing around uncomfortably around the giant cookie.

Where the hell do you work? That sounds perverted.

Shape Shifter · 09-10-2003, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NotFromHere
First of all, I can't believe they used "Bennifer" in the title. Second - I thought location was a big secret?
Third - Is this a red herring?

This is obviously a red herring. Do you really think they would share a facility with Vivian Terhark of Spooner, Wis.?

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 09-10-2003, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by str8outavannuys

The term "Paigow" is synonymous with "Really Shitty." If you've got no ace, no pair, no straight, no flush, you've got paigow. Everyone always roots for the dealer to have paigow, so the whole table wins.

This answers so many questions. Thank you.