Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Ok, just for you - this is one I pull out of the bank now and then because I think it is sort of funny and does not out me - I am afraid the best ones are kind of outable.

I used to walk to work past this store every day (this was when I was a waitress). One day, this guy (cute) came out of the store and said something like "you walk by here every day and I don't know who you are - we are having a bbq on Sunday, do you want to come by?" And I said no, but give me your number and come into my work sometime. This was when I was living with my boyfriend and I knew it was going to be over soon and was planning for the single life by collecting numbers (I was 19, sue me).

So six months later I called him. By then I had broken up with my boyfriend and moved out (with twin bed in tow, which by now, I desparately wanted to get rid of). We went out, got drunk and ended up at my place in the twin bed. It was kind of ho-hum, but anyway - I got up to get a drink of water or something and wander about, wondering whether he is going to stay over or not. I wander back to the bedroom and my bed is on fucking fire. On fire!! With him in it. So I grab this big saucepan and fill it with water, panicking sort of, and throw it on him. The fire still doesn't go out so I grab another big bucket and throw it on the bed, and another. And the fire goes out. I had no smoke detector at the time. (bad me).

Anyway, miraculously, he is not burned (except for some tiny burn on his leg), but my bed is ruined and it stinks to high heaven. I tell him that I think he should leave. So he does and I end up getting rid of that stupid bed and everything is fine.

But about three years later, I am working in a totally different place, part time now b/c I am in school, but who should walk in. And he sits down and I say "hello, how are you" knowing full well who it is, Mr. Pyro. And he doesn't fucking recognize me. I ask him if he has set any beds on fire lately and he looks at me with such a blank look that it is hard to believe he is acting. I think he had no idea who I was. Weird.

I assume he had been smoking in bed, no?

Some folks are very wierd in their recollections. I was at a wedding a few weeks ago where some guy told my wife's friend that he had sex with her during high school within earshot of a group of us. The friend politely said "No, we had a 69, but never intercourse", which of course made the group of us standing nearby listen more intently. The guy (who was a total tool) insisted they had had sex and the friend got pissed. Eventually, the two started arguing. The friend is not liar, not did she drink a lot in high school, so here recollection of who she fucked was crystalline, yet this cat would not relent, and in fact rambled on about details of thier alleged sex. I believe some people have amazing abilities in regard to altering their past in their own heads, and I'll bet the guy who burned your bed did exactly that. Its a really scary power of the mind, but it sounds like in your situation, it worked to your advantage, since the sex wasn't memorable anyway...

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by spookyfish

My vote for biggest loss to a show in terms of an actor's death was the death of the much beloved Nicholas Colesanto who played Coach on Cheers.

sf

I'm violating my "scroll, then post" rule, so it may have been mentioned, but I gotta say that News Radio was never the same after Phil Hartman died. The Simpsons, however, managed to pull themselves together and move on.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
I think that award was previously given to the "raped by a clown" episode of Little House on the Prairie.

Which is really something, considering that the show also had "very special episodes" in which (1) a chick goes blind; (2) her husband is blind, then regains his sight, then goes blind again; (3) the blind chick's baby dies in a fire at the school for the blind; (4) another dude gets hooked on morphine, (5) the family opens a restaurant; (6) that Nellie bitch marries a MOT; (7) Shannen Doherty joins the cast; and (8) Jason Bateman joins the cast.

Band camp and Little House on the Prarie? I think I kicked your ass at least once in junior high, after you stopped coming to gym because you took one to the head during dodgeball.

TM

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by dtb
From one of the best movies in the last 10 years (one of the few I actually own on DVD).

Another favorite that just popped into my head (but not from that movie):

Kid (feeling remorse after shooting dude who was taking a crap): "But he had it comin'!"

William Munny: Sigh. "We all have it comin' kid."

Bill: "You be William Munny out of Missouri... killed women and children."

Munny: "That's right, I've killed women and children, killed just about everything that walks or crawls at one time or another, and I'm here to kill you Little Bill, for what you did to Ned."

. . . .

Bill: "I don't deserve this... to die like this... I was building a home."

Munny: "Desrves got nothin to do with it (pulls trigger)"

. . .

Munny: "You better clear away from there."

(Shoots saloon owner)

Bill: "Well Sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch... you just shot an unarmed man."

Munny: "Well, he should've armed himself is he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend."

I have the last ten min of that flick saved permanently on TIVO. Greatest movie ending in history.

S("Any man takes a shot at me, I'm gonna kill him, not only kill him, I'm going to kill his wife and kids and all his friends... burn his damn house down...")D

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I'm violating my "scroll, then post" rule, so it may have been mentioned, but I gotta say that News Radio was never the same after Phil Hartman died. The Simpsons, however, managed to pull themselves together and move on.

Good one, but I must disagree on one point. The Simpsons loss of Lionel Hutz, Mall Attorney was far from recoverable.

sf

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I'm violating my "scroll, then post" rule, so it may have been mentioned, but I gotta say that News Radio was never the same after Phil Hartman died.

I haven't been the same since Phil Hartman died.

Is A&E going to put Newsradio back on or what?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Band camp and Little House on the Prarie? I think I kicked your ass at least once in junior high, after you stopped coming to gym because you took one to the head during dodgeball.

TM

DEBATE camp not band camp. He was neither athletic nor musical and no doubt his short dork belligerence issues made some pitying teacher think that at least he could perhaps interact with others at DEBATE camp. It was a pathetic, last-ditch and ultimately hopeless attempt to socialize him.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
With all due respect, why do you think I give a shit about what others think? This is shit I dont want to read, and I am expressing it. If you dont like it, feel free to put me on ignore. THats why its there. So make me laugh or shut the fuck up.

Originally posted by evenodds
It's a good thing we have avatars, or I would have misattributed this.

Are you crazy?














There's no way I would have said, "With all due respect."

TM

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
it lies. no way I'm living to fucking 84.

Odd, it told me I died last year.



Actually, it said I would live to 79. I call bullshit.

[Penske_Account]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Band camp and Little House on the Prarie? I think I kicked your ass at least once in junior high, after you stopped coming to gym because you took one to the head during dodgeball.

TM

Ha, that reminds of the time I had to kick your ass when you broke away from your viewing of Small Wonder to interrupt me and your mamma just because you had wet your pants. Again.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Ok, just for you - this is one I pull out of the bank now and then because I think it is sort of funny and does not out me - I am afraid the best ones are kind of outable.

I used to walk to work past this store every day (this was when I was a waitress). One day, this guy (cute) came out of the store and said something like "you walk by here every day and I don't know who you are - we are having a bbq on Sunday, do you want to come by?" And I said no, but give me your number and come into my work sometime. This was when I was living with my boyfriend and I knew it was going to be over soon and was planning for the single life by collecting numbers (I was 19, sue me).

So six months later I called him. By then I had broken up with my boyfriend and moved out (with twin bed in tow, which by now, I desparately wanted to get rid of). We went out, got drunk and ended up at my place in the twin bed. It was kind of ho-hum, but anyway - I got up to get a drink of water or something and wander about, wondering whether he is going to stay over or not. I wander back to the bedroom and my bed is on fucking fire. On fire!! With him in it. So I grab this big saucepan and fill it with water, panicking sort of, and throw it on him. The fire still doesn't go out so I grab another big bucket and throw it on the bed, and another. And the fire goes out. I had no smoke detector at the time. (bad me).

Anyway, miraculously, he is not burned (except for some tiny burn on his leg), but my bed is ruined and it stinks to high heaven. I tell him that I think he should leave. So he does and I end up getting rid of that stupid bed and everything is fine.

But about three years later, I am working in a totally different place, part time now b/c I am in school, but who should walk in. And he sits down and I say "hello, how are you" knowing full well who it is, Mr. Pyro. And he doesn't fucking recognize me. I ask him if he has set any beds on fire lately and he looks at me with such a blank look that it is hard to believe he is acting. I think he had no idea who I was. Weird.

Finally, we know what "sex like burning" is. Thanks, Gwinky, you rule!

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by Penske_Account
Ha, that reminds of the time I had to kick your ass when you broke away from your viewing of Small Wonder to interrupt me and your mamma just because you had wet your pants. Again.

Congrats on your personal 420 post!

[Dualit]

Originally posted by Gattigap
Where would one find a black Catholic church, anyway?

My former secretary attends one in Brooklyn.

Edited to add that I am expected to live to 88. Surprising, considering my purity score.

Dua(gave up lots of my former habits)lit

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
It's sort of like watching the head cheerleader from high school get fat, pregnant, addicted to qualudes, and live in a trailer in the year or two after graduation.

It's comments like this that keep bringing me back here, against my better judgment and need to bill more hours.

That, and the occasional naked pictures.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
We went out, got drunk and ended up at my place in the twin bed. It was kind of ho-hum

I wander back to the bedroom and my bed is on fucking fire. On fire!!

And he doesn't fucking recognize me. I ask him if he has set any beds on fire lately and he looks at me with such a blank look that it is hard to believe he is acting. I think he had no idea who I was. Weird.

Okay. I'm confused. Either (i) you were the cause of the ho-hum sex which was so forgetable that the guy couldn't remember you after doing you and setting your bed on fire or (ii) this guy set a bunch of women's beds on fire so he doesn't know who you are because there are just too many to remember any one chick or (iii) he's nuts and you fuck like a phoenix.

Thurgreed(I'll take door number three)Marshall