Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I don't think so. If you've slept with a REALLY hot girl, and your buddies say "man you're lucky -- I'd love to fuck her", the normal response is "trust me - nothing to write home to mom about - she was a terrible lay"...In fact I've heard this quite frequently.

Unfortunately you really can never tell. Mild-mannered Susie could be a fuck-beast, while drinking, smoking hot Tara could lay there like a stiff board...

In fact, it's usually the cute but not uber-hot girls that absolutely go ape-shit in the sack.

Truest statement ever. I had this totally dowdy but attractive chick on my freshman hall in college. no one knew her. No parties, no sorority rush... she barely came out of her room. Then her bf came up and visited and she fucking banged like a wild boar all weekend. It sounded like he was trying to tickle her intestines or something. Blood-curdling shit...

Worst ever on the "pick up a hottie" front was this chick I met in DC. She was totally put together and wired on the hill and all business. She seemed like a total vixen in the sack. We get drunk, go back to her place and start fucking around and I take off her panties and find a bush as big as Little Caesar's personal pizza! I couldn't figure this shit out... her clothes were impeccable, her place was fantastic, her body was great, but her bush was stuck in 1971... and since I'd committed, I had to go down on her. I thought I was going to choke... when we finally started fucking I kept coughing because it felt like I'd swallowed an Irish wool golf sweater. I totally "phoned it in" that night. The next morning when she went to the bathroom she busted me checking out the jungle. I said "I was admiring your ass" but what i really wanted to say was "Goddamnit... you should've warned me you wear a mirkin... from all indicators I figured you totally shaved." We had sex again anyway and it was better the next morning because at that point all the wool previously in mouth had slid down into my stomach and I could breathe freely. The moral of this digression was "a hottie can be defective under the packaging in a variety of respects."

S(I think of her every time my cat yarfs a furball)D

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
I've never been able to figure out why anyone buys a new car, myself. Get something a couple or three years out of the showroom with a decent maintenance record and no bad crash history, you take advantage of the biggest chunk of depreciation, it's new enough to not be technologically defunct yet, and you have good information on the reliability of the model. Plus, if you want, you can afford something much nicer than you can get new. Then take care of it.

I think new car smell is overrated.

BR(sold the car I got in '86 last year, it's still a real goer)C

Please tell me more. I've been thinking about buying a 2-year old car. Atticus? Good idea?

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
It goes between the Oregon and Pennsylvania plates.

"A leading British museum has paid $387,000 for a Renaissance plate which shows a male head made up entirely of phalluses."

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...od_nm/plate_dc

(spree: penii on plate, story and picture)

That was actually much more amusing than I thought it would be.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I know several.

They would be the gay friends you were talking about, right?

[Jack Manfred]

Originally posted by Seven of Nine
Well, you could always just pierce your tongue, crop your hair and wear your rugby shirt around. It certainly seems to work at Wellesley.

Originally posted by dtb
Huh? Are you suggesting that lesbians go to Wellesley? No doubt this is true. However, if you are putting forth the claim that the sapphic population is per-capita greater than at any other institution of higher learning (excepting all-male institutions, of course), such claim is dubious indeed; and shit.

Because the correct answer is Mills College in Oakland.

Are there any all-male colleges left in America?

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
"a hottie can be defective under the packaging in a variety of respects."

Is this your third "hottie" of the day or only the second? Do you call women hotties to their faces? Just wondering. Quite prevalent phrase down here with the just out of A&M crowd, and otherwise unused. I think with good reason.

[dc_chef]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
I've never been able to figure out why anyone buys a new car, myself.

BR(sold the car I got in '86 last year, it's still a real goer)C

You live in New York. You giving advice on cars is like some redneck giving advice about when a woman should wear diamonds.

Also, if you buy used cars, you can't get the latest and greatest thing that's out there. The amount of excellent new car models is astonishing. Compare what's out there today with what is even two or three years old, and it's amazing. For example, for $19,995, you can get a brand new Dodge Neon SRT. If you want to spend more, you can get a Volvo S60 T5R. With the Neon, you'd have to find a used car that is now selling for $20,000 that will do 0-60 mph in under six seconds. With the Volvo, there simply wasn't anything made two or three years ago with 300 horsepower, all wheel drive, and a six speed manual. The closest thing is a used Audi S4, if you can find one. You'd end up with a smaller car that might not be as quick, not to mention how much sooner you'd have to start taking it in to the shop for basic maintenance and repairs, such as new brakes, new tires, new belts and hoses, etc.

If people see cars as merely an appliance, sure, go out and get yourself a three year old gold Toyota Camry with the four cylinder and automatic. Otherwise, it's tough to beat the new cars that are on the market today.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Your slam would be vaguely appropriate if I weren't working on my laptop. outside on my porch. under a huge tree.

the breeze is delightful.

I am only sorry it is not your neighbor's tree.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Is this your third "hottie" of the day or only the second? Do you call women hotties to their faces? Just wondering. Quite prevalent phrase down here with the just out of A&M crowd, and otherwise unused. I think with good reason.

"Hottie" is a term of endearment. My wife uses it to describe hot guys. Quite prevalent up in these parts. Its not a derogatory term in any respect at all.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
"Hottie" is a term of endearment. My wife uses it to describe hot guys. Quite prevalent up in these parts. Its not a derogatory term in any respect at all.

No not derogatory. Just irritating when overused. But my dislike of the term could have something to do with the A&M loser I dated and his friends. Ugh. And I was even the recipient of the term!

Reminds me of the Blind Date show where the guy has some annoying phrase that he keeps repeating (Hey Kitty! or something similar) and the chick just about pushes him out of the ferris wheel about the 10th time he says it. Now I'll have to go to the Blind Date website and find out what the phrase was.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
You know, that plate bears a remarkable similarity to an animated .gif I saw of a male brain. http://cntaylor5.tripod.com/id531.htm (spree: bawdy .gif)

Right before opening this, I got corralled by a greyhair into a very detailed, very one way discussion on breeding horses. The gestures he was making with his pumping fist were making me quite uncomfortable given our close proximity to several female coworkers. I broke away as soon as I could and was still feeling a little squicky when I opened this picture. It made me laugh.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by dc_chef
You live in New York. You giving advice on cars is like some redneck giving advice about when a woman should wear diamonds.

Which is I'm always confused when I see Boxsters and (non-Ford like) Jags and 7-series Beemers parked on the street in Chicago. How often do you need it? That shit is gonna get dinged up. Don't buy a car that nice unless you can afford the garage. I drive my car maybe 2x a week. In a normal week it's driven MAYBE 20 miles. My car is a '95 and is falling apart, but I have no desire to buy something really nice for city driving.

[dc_chef]

Yeah, when Mrs. Chef and I lived downtown, we got rid of my nice new car and kept her old, beat up, Jewish mother mobile (that she had gotten for free while in college(!)), because we didn't want to garage my car. (Didn't help that the insurance was going to be 3x as much for my car as it was for hers.) Then we moved out of the city and both ran out and bought new cars.

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Which is I'm always confused when I see Boxsters and (non-Ford like) Jags and 7-series Beemers parked on the street in Chicago. How often do you need it? That shit is gonna get dinged up. Don't buy a car that nice unless you can afford the garage. I drive my car maybe 2x a week. In a normal week it's driven MAYBE 20 miles. My car is a '95 and is falling apart, but I have no desire to buy something really nice for city driving.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by dc_chef
You live in New York. You giving advice on cars is like some redneck giving advice about when a woman should wear diamonds.

True true. And I admit, my car didn't live here with me, so it made no sense to hold on. I miss that car. It was a sweet little trooper.

Also, if you buy used cars, you can't get the latest and greatest thing that's out there.

Yeah, see, that's what I don't get. I recognize there is a whole romantic technophile element to getting the latest thing. But I don't get it. (Even with shoes I never go trendy, and I cry when they wear out.)

The amount of excellent new car models is astonishing.

Yes, but if you get it new you don't know if you're getting one of the good ones or some misdesigned piece of shit. Why not wait and let someone else pay for the privilege of testing it out first?

If people see cars as merely an appliance,

Yup.

sure, go out and get yourself a three year old gold Toyota Camry with the four cylinder and automatic.

Hey, I'd plan to get a damn nice luxury car for what you'd pay for that Camry new.

[evenodds]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Isn't that true of all hot people? That they're more selfish and self centered and therefore bad in bed? Plus - who needs to be good when people are thowing themselves at you. Who's going to be there to tell you how bad you are when you can just go out and get someone new. Oh, the tragedy of being beautiful.

I have had sex with two stunningly beautiful men (not simultaneously). They were both good in bed -- one spectacular. The one who was just good has had more ass thrown at him than he could ever possiblyuse as a result of his looks and his profession, but he still put a tremendous effort in to ensure the months we were together were well spent. The one who was spectacular made sex his raison d'etre, God bless him.

As for Interruptus:

I was having sex at my office in a space that was being reconfigured and underconstruction. We were interrupted by construction workers at the main entrance. He went to deal with them while I looked for as much of my clothing as I could find. Come to think of it, this used to happen to us a lot -- his office, my office, conference rooms, etc. Every door had a deadbolt, just in case.