Fringey's taut-abbed painter

[LessinSF]

[lookingformarket]

Originally posted by Gattigap
Me, I was the starting nose tackle, so ordinarily the prom and the girls who flung themselves at me would've been a huuge deal, but fortunately I went on to play in Division I-A, and that's made all the difference.

Reading between the lines

I did so much acid on my prom night that I irreparably damaged my brain. I have delusional fantasies and had to become a lawyer.

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by Not Bob
I have an aquaintance whose wife (a stay at home mom) had liposuction a few years ago. After their second kid, she dieted and exercised, and was in great shape, but was very unhappy about a certain body part. She starved herself to get rid of the fat on it, and it stayed (good genes, I guess) -- even though her face looked shrunken and shriveled.

Anyhow, she consulted a plastic surgeon, went on a normal diet to get her face back, and talked her husband into getting her the lipo. The two of them had problems almost immediately -- she started going out without him, and then moved out a few months later. I think they *must* have had issues before the lipo, but it was like the new her was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Another weird thing about lipo, in addition to allowing NotBob's wife to leave him, is that it apparently prevents fat cells from growing back in the region where the lipo was done, so you can't really get fat there anymore. The result is that people only get fat in weird areas, like their wrists and necks and ankles.

I have observed one female acquaintance (spelling?) to have a strangely large ass when she is otherwise skinny, and some women we both know tell me that's because she had lipo in a bunch of places on her stomach and her thighs. It's pretty fucked-up looking.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by LessinSF

Because in SF, people aren't as accepting of your white pants/cream and pink sweater combo as you'd like?

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Shit. Time to google.

Thanks. Now I have my "random fact to regale everyone with" at XMas dinner.

I am scared to google that shit at work, too, but is that really true? The "real killer" cut out her breast implants?* Can a layman do that and keep them intact if he's not worried about hurting the cutee? I thought it was more difficult.

* That's fucking sick, but here's a joke about it anyway...

[lookingformarket]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Because sometimes, I am not so sure. It seems that your leader is under attack by the insurgents and people are standing around talking about funbags and funyuns and post counts like nothing is happening. Its like MR farted and Atticus is trying to shield his erection by talking about religion in italics. It dawned on me that when I posted the pic of , and Abba said "wtf is that" and a bunch of people responded taht people were not necessarily sure I was painting a pic of the Hairless Consig. Which is kind of astounding. This is compounded by some brilliant socking by the insurgents and even a clever story about someone living in the past and not realizing that a certain period in one's history is over. The only props I see are from old skoolers on these points. Is this because you people are a bunch of lemmings who fear overthrow of your dicatatorship or is it because you are simply too newber to get it? I didn't think the latter was possible, and it certainly isn't that my fellow insurgents aren't doing genius work. So its gotta be the former, right? Or is it the latter?

Awesome, you've returned to your highest form. After TM translates this, I might have a more substantive response. For now, Kudos!!

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by mmm3587
I am scared to google that shit at work, too, but is that really true? The "real killer" cut out her breast implants?* Can a layman do that and keep them intact if he's not worried about hurting the cutee? I thought it was more difficult.

* That's fucking sick, but here's a joke about it anyway...

It only happens in NY and LA.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by LessinSF

They have those bicycle taxis in New York too.

TM

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I know you're enjoying your new persona like the nerd who graduates junior high and moves to a different county before starting high school as a goth, but stop with the stupid fucking messages after posts and edits and pms. They aren't funny. They've never been funny. They make you look stupid. Change them to something that makes sense.

I know that you won't change them now because it will look like you're doing it because I told you to and your new image won't allow that, but someone needed to tell you.

TM

Happy holidays, asshole.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by mmm3587
Happy holidays, asshole.

A cut and paste as your best post ever?

Figures.

TM

[mmm3587]

Originally posted by LessinSF

That is an awesome fucking rickshaw!

Fuck, STP.

Originally posted by lookingformarket
Awesome, you've returned to your highest form. After TM translates this, I might have a more substantive response. For now, Kudos!!

Thank you. While I am not sure I believe a word of what you are saying, I do believe that encouraging nondrivel is the only way to save this board from a rehash of reading about proms and shit. Though I did enjoy SD post to BnB about the Brazenette's likely prom scenario. Only he can truly do justic to the mundacities of the drivel we see far too much of here.

Oh, and Hairless Consig is Slave. It is because he doesn't allow body hair to thrive on his body and bc he used to refer to himself as the Consiglierie above his avatar in some kind of bow to his own megalomaniacalness. I apologize for the possible confusion. I should never reference a metaphor with a slam. Defeats the purpose.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by mmm3587
Another weird thing about lipo, in addition to allowing NotBob's wife to leave him, is that it apparently prevents fat cells from growing back in the region where the lipo was done, so you can't really get fat there anymore. The result is that people only get fat in weird areas, like their wrists and necks and ankles.

I have observed one female acquaintance (spelling?) to have a strangely large ass when she is otherwise skinny, and some women we both know tell me that's because she had lipo in a bunch of places on her stomach and her thighs. It's pretty fucked-up looking.

Fat cells increase or decrease, they don't multiply or go away. Lipo gets rid of the fat cell all together, and the body doesn't replace fat cells once they're gone.

[LessinSF]

The breast implant removal story is a hoax. Here is the coroner's report - http://www.lectlaw.com/files/cas45.htm . The key paragraph states "Examination of the breasts reveals bilateral silastic implants that are intact. Otherwise, no other significant changes are noted in the breasts. The remainder of the musculoskeletal system and subcutaneous tissue are
anatomic."

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by mmm3587
Happy holidays, asshole.

This may work better as a song parody. In the meantime, may I suggest a new avatar?