Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Don't get your tidy whiteys in a twist; its only a hand job.

1. I'm a boxers man, Commando.

2. She was talking fuck.

3. But she made a point of telling me she decided against it.

4. So I had to settle for a blow job. Her story about having sucked a lot of dick in LS may have some basis in the truth.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Well then come up with a better topic. If you aren't too tired from entertaining the out-of-towners during taxapalooza. About which, incidentally, ew.

See, that's why you never get invited.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
his character or his career?

Unfortunately, yes.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
Oh, and on this point: I'm sorry I don't mentally catalog every discussion on these forums. There are times when I go months and months without reading a single post and even when I am reading, I do a ton of skimming, so yeah, I miss a lot.

I am glad, however, that my ignorance on this point and others has given people an opportunity to chuckle. It's what I'm here for. Let me know if there's any other way I can be of service to you 4000+ posters.

Fetch me a martini.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Red Bull is either the most misunderstood beverage ever, or the vilest liquid ever purported to be intended for human consumption. If forced to either fuck Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson while watching Starsky and Hutch and Meet the Parents in a marathon or drink a Red Bull, I'm really not sure which I'd choose.

I'd take the pegging, personally.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Its a publicity stunt.

If its not, and I were judge, here's how this piece of shit would end.

"I grant the defendant's motion to dismiss, with costs. You fucked a well known tramp in a public office building. Whatever harm came to you came at least more than 50% as a result of your own negligence. And you haven't disputed the truth of anything asserted. To quote my favorite Radiohead song, 'This is what you get.'"

You're on crack. If you're going that route, there are only two choices.

"In a fast german car/I'm amazed that I survived/An airbag saved my life."

Or "when I am king you will be first against the wall."

Granted, neither of those fit well into your draft opinion . . .

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Google says her:



TM

I just thought everyone would want to see her again.

Mmmmmmm, ratio.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
So I was at the wedding of one of Mr Man's siblings this weekend* (I'm sure you are all jealous), and I was joking around with his aunt and uncle that there were only two requirements for me at the reception:

*no, bilmore, I did not do the funky chicken. or the dollar dance. and yes, I realize that makes me a humorless bitch.

Did you do the Hokey Pokey? 'Cause that's what it is all about.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by taxwonk
Fetch me a martini.

Only about 760 more posts and you'll qualify for one!

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by sunnybunny
Only Newfie I know is handicapped and in a wheel chair and bumps into things all the time. He's kinda loveable in that vulnerable kinda way. Though he drools too much for my taste.

It's been a long time since I've heard any Newfie jokes. Not sure that this counts as one, so here's my favorite:

This Newfie is going icefishing. He starts to drill a hole with
his auger when a loud booming voice says "THERE'S NO FISH DOWN THERE!"

So he stops drilling and moves a little ways and starts to drill again. The same voice booms "THERE'S NO FISH DOWN THERE!".

So he moves a little further and is about to drill again, but the voice immediately comes again "THERE"S NO FISH THERE EITHER!".

The Newf looks around and says "Who are you anyways? God?"

"NO I'M THE ARENA MANAGER!"

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Mister_Ruysbroeck
Only about 760 more posts and you'll qualify for one!

You are sending mixed messages. Yesterday, having 4,000 posts was bad (although I can't imagine why an admin would want to discourage posting, especially on a slow day), today, you are going to reward wonk if he hits 4,000. Which is it?

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Hey, dipshit, that would violate lawtalkers' no outing policy. Then you'll have plenty of time not to post here. Gold star, lots of billing, etc.

NCS: Please ban everyone who's ever mentioned me and Yale in the same post.

On another note, it's college reunion time coming up. Any NYCers know of any good ways to get from JFK to New Haven on Friday rush hour? I don't feel like renting a car. Am I stuck with making my way to Grand Central and jumping on Metro North?

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
NCS: Please ban everyone who's ever mentioned me and Yale in the same post.

On another note, it's college reunion time coming up. Any NYCers know of any good ways to get from JFK to New Haven on Friday rush hour? I don't feel like renting a car. Am I stuck with making my way to Grand Central and jumping on Metro North?

I agree, casey. Ban him.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Any NYCers know of any good ways to get from JFK to New Haven on Friday rush hour?

Rebook, and fly into Hartford? You're going into that fray on the friday of a long weekend? I'd get an airport shuttle, and a stack of paperbacks, and hope for the best.

Yale's standards for basic common sense clearly have fallen.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
I just thought everyone would want to see her again.

Mmmmmmm, ratio.

She has no hips. I think for a good ratio there are supposed to be hips/ass to balance out the tits. She's just freakish.