A sad, constant bid for attention

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
My dad used to have a secretary named Toy.

My secretary's name is Sukyu Dri.

You should see the lips on him.

[dtb]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Get the insurance. Then you can get drunk, jump in a pool in Vegas with your phone in your pocket, not realize it for a good 30 seconds, get out, take your phone in, answer the question, "Did you get it wet?" with, "Only if you count submerging it while jumping into a pool while drunk in Vegas as wet," and have them deliver a newer model (because they don't make the older model anymore) overnight.

TM

Does this work only if the pool is in Vegas?

Also... this:

• Those Germans can design some electronic shit, let me tell you. I'm so glad they've taken all that negative take-over-the-world-ethnic-cleansing energy and put it to good use.

was hilarious. It reminded me of the Colin Quinn bit on Weekend Update commenting the Scientologists claim that they were being persecuted for their religious beliefs by the German government. He said that the official German response was "We're Germans. When we want to persecute you for your religious beliefs, you'll know."

[patentparanyc]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
Sucking up to Hank, I see.

It is the one-two punch. Penske as well. We're broad based with our sucking up.

Are you jealous? aww that's cute.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
If it forms a seal with the floor, how is it picking things up off the floor? This does not make sense to me.

The back part of the hard wood floor vacuum head has a rubber strip that lowers. It doesn't form an airtight seal, but when the inner brush (which is softer for the hard wood floor attachment) spins, no dirt can escape from the back because the rubber piece forms a seal with the floor.

Originally posted by ltl/fb
But I don't really care.

Oh, but you do. And if you're using the most powerful setting on a rug or something and you screw up and have it on the wrong height or whatever and it picks up the rug, you don't have to bend over to pull the rug off. You just slip a piece on the handle near your thumb down and the air comes in there, and the rug just drops off. It's like an auto tracheotomy feature.

TM

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by dtb
Does this work only if the pool is in Vegas?

Also... this:

• Those Germans can design some electronic shit, let me tell you. I'm so glad they've taken all that negative take-over-the-world-ethnic-cleansing energy and put it to good use.

was hilarious. It reminded me of the Colin Quinn bit on Weekend Update commenting the Scientologists claim that they were being persecuted for their religious beliefs by the German government. He said that the official German response was "We're Germans. When we want to persecute you for your religious beliefs, you'll know."

Apropos of which, there were rumors a few days ago that the rehab program that former Rep. Foley checked into was run by the Scientologists. Anyone know more about this?

(IMHO, this post would belong on the PB but the Scientology angle keeps it here.)

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
The back part of the hard wood floor vacuum head has a rubber strip that lowers. It doesn't form an airtight seal, but when the inner brush (which is softer for the hard wood floor attachment) spins, no dirt can escape from the back because the rubber piece forms a seal with the floor.

Oh, but you do. And if you're using the most powerful setting on a rug or something and you screw up and have it on the wrong height or whatever and it picks up the rug, you don't have to bend over to pull the rug off. You just slip a piece on the handle near your thumb down and the air comes in there, and the rug just drops off. It's like an auto tracheotomy feature.

TM

Did anyone else read this post and think of Bic pens?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
My secretary's name is Sukyu Dri.

You should see the lips on him.

inflatable still, or have you come off contract status?

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Which phone do you have? I have this one:

this is mine. It looks exactly like yours when you flip it open.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
this is mine. It looks exactly like yours when you flip it open.

Our phones suck.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
The back part of the hard wood floor vacuum head has a rubber strip that lowers. It doesn't form an airtight seal, but when the inner brush (which is softer for the hard wood floor attachment) spins, no dirt can escape from the back because the rubber piece forms a seal with the floor.

Oh, but you do. And if you're using the most powerful setting on a rug or something and you screw up and have it on the wrong height or whatever and it picks up the rug, you don't have to bend over to pull the rug off. You just slip a piece on the handle near your thumb down and the air comes in there, and the rug just drops off. It's like an auto tracheotomy feature.

TM

I detest vacuuming and any kind of housework for that matter. It actually makes me angry to do it. As soon as I could afford to pay someone to do it for me, I did it. God, just thinking about vacuuming makes me feel like I want to hit something. I don't know why this is, and don't really want to go into therapy to find out. But there you go.

I guess this is a way of saying these posts are making my head hurt and I think I am just going to do the scroll by on them. Because you all wanted to know.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Our phones suck.

wanna make out?

[dtb]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
I detest vacuuming and any kind of housework for that matter. It actually makes me angry to do it. As soon as I could afford to pay someone to do it for me, I did it. God, just thinking about vacuuming makes me feel like I want to hit something. I don't know why this is, and don't really want to go into therapy to find out. But there you go.

I guess this is a way of saying these posts are making my head hurt and I think I am just going to do the scroll by on them. Because you all wanted to know.

I know this will come as a shock to everyone, but I, too, pay someone to clean up after me.

However, sometimes it's a weekend and someone spills something, and I have to break out the vacuum and clean up after one of the kids or something, and I have to say, it's somewhat satisfying to pass the vacuum over the crumbs (or whatever) and have them magically disappear.

(I feel a little like GHWB expressing amazement at the automatic checkout thing at the grocery store.)

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
wanna make out?

Our eyes met across the crowded hat store. I, a customer, and she, a coquettish haberdasher. Oh, I pursued and she withdrew, then she pursued and I withdrew, and so we danced. I burned for her, much like the burning during urination that I would experience soon afterwards.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by dtb
I know this will come as a shock to everyone, but I, too, pay someone to clean up after me.

How much?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
wanna make out?

Off my corner, or whatever.

I think this is what I ordered:




Is it going to suck?