Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by pony_trekker
G A Y

If you can wear them with that certain security -- a self-confidence, say, but not too self-confident or you're sunk -- then you can pull it off. But unless you're a trapeze artist, what pony_trekker said.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
I was a long time lurker and I remember Sebby talking about kissing a bar pick up who starting licking his ass a few minutes later. He thought he'd be okay if he didn't kiss her anymore. Someone explained unless his was her first ass he'd already been sucking at fecal bacteria, and someone else's at that. you can't clean that off. Maybe once he realized that, using one razor for both was like---ehhhh.

It was like, a half hour after I got her home.

Dude, I did NOT kiss her after she ate my ass. But would i be lying if I said I never kissed her? Of course I would. But not the evening after she did the ass eating.

And to you I say "whatever..." Like you never drunkenly kissed a girl who'd just given you a hummer. We've all been snowballed, and every woman I've ever performed connilingus on has tasted her pubes. I can help getting the damn things caught in my teeth.

Perhaps I should've dated more strippers. Perhaps I should have dated any strippers. Fuck, what was my point? Oh, your wife knows what her pubes taste like. Thats what made that episode of Curb so great. It worked on so many levels.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Spread Mycrabski
I am the Logic King. Why are you penning posts about pink panties at 10:15?

Cable's out and I can't masturbate again.

ETA: I can. But I shouldn't.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
And to you I say "whatever..." Like you never drunkenly kissed a girl who'd just given you a hummer. We've all been snowballed . . .

And to you I say "whatever..." Why would I kiss a girl after she has fellated me? Why would I even talk to her? I am done. No further interaction or communication necessary. I will kiss a girl before she fellates me. if she is a hottie and kissing her adds to the fellatio experience. But once the fellatio has been completed, there is no point. And I will not suffer any protestion from the girl post-fellatio about the lack of post-fellatio chatter or smoochy smoochy. Because I know and she knows that she will fellate me again, regardless of whether I chat her up or engage in some other form of post-fellatio intimacy. Because I know and she knows that the look in my eyes as I achieve fellatio-induced orgasm is ample reward for her, and nothing further is required or even appropriate.

[lo-berry]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
And to you I say "whatever..." Why would I kiss a girl after she has fellated me? Why would I even talk to her? I am done. No further interaction or communication necessary. I will kiss a girl before she fellates me. if she is a hottie and kissing her adds to the fellatio experience. But once the fellatio has been completed, there is no point. And I will not suffer any protestion from the girl post-fellatio about the lack of post-fellatio chatter or smoochy smoochy. Because I know and she knows that she will fellate me again, regardless of whether I chat her up or engage in some other form of post-fellatio intimacy. Because I know and she knows that the look in my eyes as I achieve fellatio-induced orgasm is ample reward for her, and nothing further is required or even appropriate.

Translation: My Jose Mourinhoesque euro-styling loverboy is subservient to me and I only communicate with him in the semiotic fashion of orally delivered cream pies.

[Pretty Little Flower]

Originally posted by lo-berry
Translation: My Jose Mourinhoesque euro-styling loverboy is subservient to me and I only communicate with him in the semiotic fashion of orally delivered cream pies.

Even though you pretend to sass me, I continue to like the cut of your jib. You've got the irreverent mojo this board desperately needs if it is to avoid slipping into complacency and irrelevance. Let's face it, nobody else is going to wake this board up. Not Sebastian, with his quasi-gonzo ramblings. Not Thurgreed, with his hyper-cranky hissy fits. Not Ironweak, with his increasingly lame attempts at witty repartee. Nope, you're pretty much all we've got. This board needs a swift kick in the ass, and I have a strong feeling that you're the only one left with sharp enough boots.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
Benecio has a sexy aura, but I can't get past the looks-like-he's-been-hit-in-the-face-repeatedly black bags under his eyes.

Has anyone sent him the link for the Neti Pot? Rumor has it that regular neti-ing reduces the appearance of dark circles over time.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
So the old lady got me some light pink pants, and they fit nice, and they're pretty solid J Crew stuff (in catalogue this year). Nice, casual fit. I plan to wear the fuckers, but a friend claims I'll look like Fred Schneider. I say fuck it. They're nice pants. Whats the verdict on pink pants?

If they're not Nantucket Reds, forget it.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by Brad Pitt
Some of my best work. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

So, Brad, are you and Angelina doing the nasty or what? Inquiring minds want to know.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Speaking of ROTN, they are remaking it (2006). This might be worse than remaking the Bad News Bears. Robert Carradine better have a role.

ETA: Billy Bob as Buttermaker? I stand corrected. This has potential.

Another one of mine. The crew gifts were fantastic. Including a stuffed bear, a Bears jersey, two pieces of luggage, two caps, etc. etc. Normally we just get a crappy fleece. So everyone go see it. The script is pretty true to the original - so much so that Bill Lancaster (dead for 10 years) got to share in the screenplay credit.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Another one of mine. The crew gifts were fantastic. Including a stuffed bear, a Bears jersey, two pieces of luggage, two caps, etc. etc. Normally we just get a crappy fleece. So everyone go see it. The script is pretty true to the original - so much so that Bill Lancaster (dead for 10 years) got to share in the screenplay credit.

In a colliding worlds kind of way, I once dated Tanner who later appeared in ROTN.

[Brad Pitt]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
So, Brad, are you and Angelina doing the nasty or what? Inquiring minds want to know.

A gentlemen does not kiss and tell. Or fuck like animals and tell. I am from Missouri, you know.

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by Brad Pitt
A gentlemen does not kiss and tell. Or fuck like animals and tell. I am from Missouri, you know.

Does a gentleman leave his wife for another woman? Spill the beans.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by Brad Pitt
Some of my best work. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

YOUR best work?

Off my corner, ho.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by Spread Mycrabski
I am a first generation tribute sock. I have moved away from the ass theme, crossed the River Taint, and pitched a tent in the pubular region. also known as the Netherlands.

That actually made me laugh. Where did you steal it from?