Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Garnier Fructis is my stripper name.

woo woo.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
driving it across a desert lined with enemy troops.

Paigow has crabs?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
It's not good on men, either, if they want mouth on the nipples.

It blends in with general chest hair. On chicks it looks like bizarre, unles they have hair on their chests. In which case you're with a tranny. Demand your $50.00 back.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
woo woo.

oh, god, until i saw the originally posted by line, i had thought that the stripper name post was by a hank, and felt a little woozy.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
It blends in with general chest hair.

Not. Always.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Also, why would it be a struggle to find the nipple in the dark? It shouldn't be that hard to find unless you're in a tangle of bodies and struggling to find the right one.

Well, struggling against the restraints could be one explanation.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Oliver_Wendell_Ramone
Speaking of Savage Love, today's column is mostly uninteresting. Except for the news that the "International Mr. Leather" competition is taking place in Chicago this very weekend! I'm thinking Wonk's a lock in the bear category. Str8 or Less, what are the offshore sports books saying about Coltrane's chances in the twink division?

I would have been a lock, but I got my back waxed last week. My favorite teenage Asian hooker told me she'd knock off $50 if I cleaned the pelt up a bit.

Originally posted by taxwonk
She's the one at Reception with the dark roots, the huge TITS!, fuck-me heels, too-tight cropped pants, a low-cut top, and a cheap gold necklace with either her name or an angel resting in her cleavage, just in case anybody missed them the first time she bent over to give the guys a peek at "what could be theirs for the asking."

Actually, I thikn Debbie is the chunk style HR lady with the bangs. The one who relocated from the midwest.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Bullshit. I look nothing like that.

I didn't mean to imply it was you. Your charm and tact are your personal guarantee against mantrapping.

[ABBAKiss]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
chunk style

I plan to use this. I will give you credit, natch.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Garnier Fructis is my stripper name.

Then why does Sidd always refer to you as "Velvet?"

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Okay, #2 is a gigantic whiff.

But you do know that when the guy is drunk, it's not so great for the girl, and that when she tells you it is, she's lying? If you're too drunk to find my (perfectly smooth) nip in the dark, I don't expect much more than sloppy smelly kisses and unsatisfying pounding. And "going forever" -- not always so great.

I never ask whhether its good. If you can't tell from the reaction, you're not working hard enough, and its probably never good.

When I say going forever, I mean switching positions about four or five times without "exiting," and going balls out for the finale. I'm not talking about pile driving her into the mattress boards. You can go forever at various speeds and contort yourself so you can grind the hell out of her as you're going to make sure you're nailing the hell out of her clit so that she gets off a buncch of times. You can't concentrate on the long part of the stroek - you have to concentrate on hitting and pressing into her he clit. When you're drunk, you can do that for longer periods without coming than you can when sober.

Jesus, I just wrote a fucking Penthouse Forum article.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by taxwonk
I didn't mean to imply it was you. Your charm and tact are your personal guarantee against mantrapping.

I don't ahve to fake it *that* long to get pregnant.

[pony_trekker]

Originally posted by tmdiva
I know I know I know (thanks to being married to a baseball rules/strategy geek)!

When there is one out or no outs, runners on at least first and second (or bases loaded), and the batter hits a high popup that could be fielded by an infielder, the ump calls infield fly while the ball is still in the air. Whether or not the ball is actually caught, the batter is out and the runners do not advance.

I guess I could Google to check for sure--the only part I might have missed is the runners on. It might be that the bases have to be loaded.

tm

Wrong in one respect: the runners can advance at their peril.

the batter is out whether the ball is caught or not. Runners may tag-up after a catch or run if no-catch. Since the batter is out all forces are removed. Rule 2.00 Infield-fly.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I never ask whhether its good. If you can't tell from the reaction, you're not working hard enough, and its probably never good.

Translation: I have not yet realized that I have been lucky enough to fuck women who quickly figure out that if they don't make any noise (eta and move around), I'm never going to stop pounding away at them.