imaginary friends to fill the void that is your gaping gash.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Another gripe - my firm has lousy cheap toilet paper. I fucking hate cheap toilet paper. They should take better care of my ass, particularly since they seem to think they own it.

We just changed vendors for the bathroom, and the griping has gone up exponentially. The old toilet paper was nice and soft and issued in tissue-like squares. The new toilet paper is not nice and soft and on rolls that never seem to want to stop. The old soap looked like soap. The new soap is foamy stuff that dissolves the second you put water on it. The old paper towels actually absorbed water. The new ones don't, and they're dispensed inadequate square at a time. So you're constantly pulling at the machine to get enough towelage to dry your hands.

State funds are not supposed to be used to buy coffee or anything else that makes employees happy. There's an office coffee fund, but I don't drink coffee so I don't know what the quality is. I imagine it's probably better than if the state bought it. There's a lot of sneaking around in this place from department to department to see who has the better digs. Our old kitchen had a full sink and three microwaves. Our current kitchen is very popular due to the vending machines, though I don't like the smell of the cork floors.

[SEC_Chick]

My firm was cheap. We had one kind of coffee (Folgers! No Less!), Lipton tea, Equal/sugar/NutraSweet, some flavored fake creamer stuff, and a rather unsanitary looking soda fountain. In-House, we have better coffee, still Lipton, instant Swiss Miss and a vending machine.


Totally unrelated:

Was I smoking crack or did I see a commercial for a prime time special: Dr. Phil with Jonathan and Victoria from The Amazing Race? After reading their website I would love to hear their thoughts on their behavior. Can anyone confirm?

Fuck off, man.

[Gattigap]

Will someone post something mildly interesting or entertaining?

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by the Guardian
Sex and the single robot

Scientists have made them walk and talk. There are even robots that can run. But a South Korean professor is poised to take their development several steps further, and give cybersex new meaning.
Kim Jong-Hwan, the director of the ITRC-Intelligent Robot Research Centre, has developed a series of artificial chromosomes that, he says, will allow robots to feel lusty, and could eventually lead to them reproducing. He says the software, which will be installed in a robot within the next three months, will give the machines the ability to feel, reason and desire.

Kim, a leading authority on technology and ethics of robotics, said: "Christians may not like it, but we must consider this the origin of an artificial species. Until now, most researchers in this field have focused only on the functionality of the machines, but we think in terms of the essence of the creatures." That "essence" is a computer code, which determines a robot's propensity to "feel" happy, sad, angry, sleepy, hungry or afraid. Kim says this software is modelled on human DNA, though equivalent to a single strand of genetic code rather than the complex double helix of a real chromosome.

Kim said: "Robots will have their own personalities and emotion and - as films like I Robot warn - that could be very dangerous for humanity. If we can provide a robot with good - soft - chromosomes, they may not be such a threat."

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Why do firms try to pull this nickle & dime bullshit? It just pisses people off way out of proportion to the costs involved. Particularly with coffee, the lifeblood of the billable hour, it just clearly can't work. In fact, at my firm they recently upgraded the coffee service (dunno if it was more expensive, but it was definitely better), and the associates were so happy that the firm got away with kinda crappy bonuses, simply because most associates deemed that they had gotten a significant raise because they no longer needed to blow $5/day on Starbucks.

Another gripe - my firm has lousy cheap toilet paper. I fucking hate cheap toilet paper. They should take better care of my ass, particularly since they seem to think they own it.

On to the poll question: I assume by "kitchen" we mean "self-serve coffee/break room" not "cafeteria kitchen staffed by supposed professionals" where you can buy subsidized sandwiches so you don't need to stop billing long enough to scavange food. So, our coffee rooms have coffee (about 6 kinds), tea, sugar, sweet & Low, whole milk, skim milk and half and half. There is a little faucet that dispenses filtered cold water and an icemaker. There are also candy-bar & soda vending machines, but the selection is unsatisfactory.

damn, we have like eight kinds of free sodas, as well as OJ. tea and all sorts of shit to put in your coffee (though I bring that from home). Nobody gets the ingredients for my popcorntomato soup? bummer.

[Buddha]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
There are also candy-bar & soda vending machines, but the selection is unsatisfactory.

2.

The fact that our machines charge us $1.50 for a can of Diet Coke doesn't help matters, either.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
My impression is "yes." Re: different varieties, it's not more expensive to provide small cartons of different types than it is a larger carton of only one type - people aren't exactly going to use 3x as much milk because they can choose from 3 types. We have the cheapie cup lids, too. But the only person I know who uses the disposable coffee cups in the kitchen is the Mr. when he visits, and he never gets a lid, just one of those plastic stirer things that he leaves on my desk and I find stuck to the underside of some document a week later. Everyone who works here pretty much uses mugs, and coffee service for clients involves china from the cafeteria.

I have found the milk purchases to be more prevalent in the NY offices of firms. In other cities, typically the mini moo type products are all ya get (or worse, the powdered shit!). My old firm had saltines in the kitchenettes. Current firm has no food (other than in vending machines), but a great selection of teas. Used to have to bring in my own tea at old firm, 'cause I'm not drinking Lipton everyday. But now I have an ample supply and selection of herbal teas. This makes me happy.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
damn, we have like eight kinds of free sodas, as well as OJ. tea and all sorts of shit to put in your coffee (though I bring that from home). Nobody gets the ingredients for my popcorntomato soup? bummer.

We are a liquids only shop. No soda, but lots of choices on herbal teas.

A lot of people use the milk for breakfast. Several people have brought in boxes of cereal that are in the cabinets.

But for food there are almost always a few baked goods or sweets in the coffee rooms. It's important to figure out who the good bakers are and be selective. No need to resort to vending machines.

There's an unwritten rule that one takes more than one beer unless there is a gathering, and the beer is viewed as there mainly to encourage small impromptu gatherings, especially when something significant closes.


EFG by my trusty associate.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
We may be narrowing in on the answer to the age-old question:

Christina or Britney?



Sorry, Chef.

I wouldn't fuck either one. Not even with Chef's dick.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by taxwonk
I wouldn't fuck either one. Not even with Chef's dick.

How bout with RT's vibrator?

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
But now I have an ample supply and selection of herbal teas. This makes me happy.

This reminds me of a deal I was on where, for whatever reason, a bunch of the lawyers on the other side were Mormon. Anyhow, when meetings convened at our offices, I put in a request for herbal teas to be provided with all coffee services. The head partner on the deal asked "why all these fancy teas?" After reassuring him that the client was not being billed any more than for the regular tea we would have provided anyway, I explained that I strongly suspected the other lawyers were Mormon, and in that case couldn't have coffee or regular teas, decaf or not.

The partner then got really weird (can't explain how, he just seemed really freaked out) and asked what made me think they were Mormons. I nearly said "um, the fact that they're well scrubbed, polite and happy all the time?" but instead said "besides the fact that they all seem to have more than 5 kids, several of them have talked about spending their missions in 3rd world countries, one's been explaining geneology resources to his client during down time, and not one has touched a drop of coffee, tea or cola during any of the all-nighters so even if they aren't Mormon it's polite to put out something they might like."

Sure enough, a couple of them started drinking the herbal teas (though a lot of Mormons I know are so used to avoiding all the regular hot beverages that they don't drink herbal teas, either), and the partner watched them bug-eyed for the rest of the deal like he thought they might sprout horns any second. He also seemed really suspicious of the fact that I apparently knew enough about Mormons not just to identify them but to think to adjust to their dietary requirements. North-easterners can be really weird about Mormons, and I dunno why. They weren't that uncommon in the section of the Patch I'm from (a few relations even converted), but a good number of native Yankees I've known seem not just to think they're exotic but to be really freaked out by them.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Not Bob
No one bought you a vibrator yet. (My money is on wonk, when he catches up in a couple of weeks.)

In other news, I hate lawyers. That is all.

Wonk has been less than 24 hours behind for weeks now, and does anybody notice? NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!.

But, I will probably buy her the vibrator when next we meet. I hate purchasing something so personal without direct input.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Why do firms try to pull this nickle & dime bullshit? It just pisses people off way out of proportion to the costs involved. Particularly with coffee, the lifeblood of the billable hour, it just clearly can't work. In fact, at my firm they recently upgraded the coffee service (dunno if it was more expensive, but it was definitely better), and the associates were so happy that the firm got away with kinda crappy bonuses, simply because most associates deemed that they had gotten a significant raise because they no longer needed to blow $5/day on Starbucks.

Another gripe - my firm has lousy cheap toilet paper. I fucking hate cheap toilet paper. They should take better care of my ass, particularly since they seem to think they own it.

On to the poll question: I assume by "kitchen" we mean "self-serve coffee/break room" not "cafeteria kitchen staffed by supposed professionals" where you can buy subsidized sandwiches so you don't need to stop billing long enough to scavange food. So, our coffee rooms have coffee (about 6 kinds), tea, sugar, sweet & Low, whole milk, skim milk and half and half. There is a little faucet that dispenses filtered cold water and an icemaker. There are also candy-bar & soda vending machines, but the selection is unsatisfactory.

The coffee room at the firm I rent space from has shitty coffee, Sweet n' Low instead of Equal or Splenda, and a refrigerator that other people steal food from.

But my boss regularly takes me out for sushi and great Mexican, so things kinda even out.

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by Buddha
2.

The fact that our machines charge us $1.50 for a can of Diet Coke doesn't help matters, either.

$1.50 for a Diet Coke? Do you work in a strip club, or an airport?

We have soda machines, coffee dispensers, OJ, grapefruit juice, tea, actual milk for coffee (whoever invented "non-dairy creamer" should be mutilated), and a bunch of crackers. And somewhere I think we've got that dehydrated soup-in-a-cup stuff, but that scares me so I try not to think about it.

But drinking glasses of milk is verboten, I think -- something about it being difficult to get milk delivered by the same people who deliver the juice. If you're pregnant you can drink milk by the glass, otherwise leave it for coffee.

And gatti, if this post bores you, then log off and get some fucking work done.