Fashion Board 12-09-03 through 1-08-04

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
sculptures of genitalia can be very aesthetically pleasing. The real thing (male or female) is not always so. But it can be.

I think it really just depends on how turned on you are.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by taxwonk
Okay. Now I get it. You were just being hopelessly lame. Thanks for the explanation. And for what it's worth, I wouldn't fuck you either. Not even with Not Me's dick.

That's a lie. You would so.

TM

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
sculptures of genitalia can be very aesthetically pleasing. The real thing (male or female) is not always so. But it can be.

As long as there's a place for batteries.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Now, if a chick has a good uniform but a bad helmet, she's generally fuckable but not datable. You cannot date anyone you can't look in the eye without first having a six pack. There's a chick in my office with a stunning body and a head that could scare a dog off a meat wagon. She ain't ugly, but she's got the "Jersey Claw"* haircut and she applies her makeup with a paint gun. I think if I sedated her and sent her to Elizabeth Arden with a blank check they'd send me back a hottie. On the other hand, a chick with a body like Gisele and a head like Rick Ocasek is still going to be single. She needs to date the skinny guy with the fat ass, but life is cruel, so they'll probably never meet each other. That's Darwin for ya.

Darwin wouldn't fuck her either.

TM

Originally posted by taxwonk
huh?

cite please

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield


Now, if a chick has a good uniform but a bad helmet, she's generally fuckable but not datable.

No, not even fuckable. It's not worth the abuse I STILL get for screwing that butterface in college...

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Sometimes you should think really hard whether you are about to post would make sense to anyone other than you. Seriously. It probably wouldn't take much effort. And I don't think you're that far removed from reality (yet) that this might be a good exercise for you.

TM

Sounds like someone had a brain tumor for breakfast. OK, lets walk you through this. You always say how NFH always cuts and pastes stuff from other sources, like newspapers and magazines and stuff rather than posts her own material. You just cut and paste a fucking forwarded email which is like three notches below an article from People on Bennifer and about seven notches beneath your usual stuff. So, I said did NFH get your login bc I was mocking the cutting and pasting of the nonsense.

Comprendes?

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I never said my wife had a sweaty salt lick between here legs. Nor dis I say that she was smuggling a quivering mound of greased roast beef between her thighs. I merely made general statements about the fact that cunnilingus can be salty and female genitalia can at times resemble rancid lunchmeat.

Note to Self:

Catching up on the FB is a bad idea when eating a carry out roast beef sandwich.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Sounds like someone had a brain tumor for breakfast. OK, lets walk you through this. You always say how NFH always cuts and pastes stuff from other sources, like newspapers and magazines and stuff rather than posts her own material. You just cut and paste a fucking forwarded email which is like three notches below an article from People on Bennifer and about seven notches beneath your usual stuff. So, I said did NFH get your login bc I was mocking the cutting and pasting of the nonsense.

Comprendes?

Got it. It was the jump from newspaper articles to emails. But you misunderstand my criticism of NFH. I enjoy when people post interesting articles. I just find it weird that there is no substance to her posts. It's just, "Look at what I read today."

TM

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
roast beef

Everyone, it's roast BEAST. Get it right. It's the holidays.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
Everyone, it's roast BEAST. Get it right. It's the holidays.

Hollywood has completely ruined Dr. Seuss for me.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
Note to Self:

Catching up on the FB is a bad idea when eating a carry out roast beef sandwich.

Tasty. Make sure to slather that baby up with mayo or white horseradish sauce.

I recommend against barbeque.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
If someone could give me something that would get over the nausea your posts induce, I would appreciate it.

TM

Some choices for you:

Send me to the land of Fu. I mean, who cares?

Ignore the posts.

Avoid responding to them, eliciting subsequent responses.


-- Merry Christmas and Get Well Soon

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
During this fine holiday season I would like to wonder aloud to the board why lawyers are so fucking cheap.

Everyone around here, IT, Finance, A/P, H/R, everyone, gets these great gifts from vendors and consultants. What do I get from the outside firms that I use? Nothing but stinking fucking cards.

And I know that it isn't just me. I have spoken with other GCs and find that law firms are just plain stingy at the holidays -- unless, perhaps, you are a multi-million dollar client rather than coming in just under a million in billables.

What is up with that? How embarrassing it is when everyone pools their gifts to share here at the home office and I have nothing...nothing. Every year it is the same.
Cheap-ass fucking lawyers.

Starting next year I am demanding gifts or the work dries up.

Feel free to send me contact information. Nice gifts and contact information will follow. All work appreciated.

--Shameless

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Hollywood has completely ruined Dr. Seuss for me.

This guy needs to be brainwashed by immediate multiple viewings of the animated Christmas special. Not to be a sap here, but I can't permit Dr. Suess to be ruined for anyone by some technicolor bathroom-joke multimillion dollar piece of crap.

Come to think of it, better make you watch a bunch of claymation Rankin-Bass specials too, just for good measure.