imaginary friends to fill the void that is your gaping gash.

[Diane_Keaton]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
I totally disagree with Diane Keaton.... And then, once dressed, walk in and own the suit. If you know what I mean.

Well, okay then, if this poster has the panache to own the suit as you say. On the other hand, if he doesn't already have one back at the bachelor's pad in Houston, spending a Saturday in Austin getting a tux that he'll have for quite a while and that he will look great in tonight doesn't sound that bad. Plus, the sex would probably be better tonight.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Okay, this may be totally outable, but I live in Houston, and my gf lives in Austin. I am planning to move to Austin, but have not found suitable employment there yet. Nevertheless, I travel to Austin most weekends, and I am in Austin now.

We are attending some charity event, the Heart Ball (ball, heh) tomorrow night. I just found out that it is black tie. I did not bring a tux with me. I have a midnight blue Calvin Klein 3 button suit with me. I brought a red tie with a subtle pattern, thinking this would be Valentiney, but obviously it is not black.

Can I cure this by buying a more formal tie, like something silver or white (again, not black, but whatever) and monochromatic? Should I call the rental (gasp) places to see if they can do a same-day job? Should I stay at home and prepare for the Super Bowl? Are actual fashion questions discussed on this board?

T-shirt tux? You seemed to "own" that look at my daughter bat mitzvah, and I had the sense it wasn't a rental- at least by the end of the night it wasn't.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter


We are attending some charity event, the Heart Ball (ball, heh) tomorrow night. I just found out that it is black tie. I did not bring a tux with me.

Fire your girlfriend for failing to tell you about the tux requirement. That's an inexcusable oversight. Or tell her that because of her failings, she has to fuck you all night instead of going to the ball.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Okay, this may be totally outable, but I live in Houston, and my gf lives in Austin. I am planning to move to Austin, but have not found suitable employment there yet. Nevertheless, I travel to Austin most weekends, and I am in Austin now.

We are attending some charity event, the Heart Ball (ball, heh) tomorrow night. I just found out that it is black tie. I did not bring a tux with me. I have a midnight blue Calvin Klein 3 button suit with me. I brought a red tie with a subtle pattern, thinking this would be Valentiney, but obviously it is not black.

Can I cure this by buying a more formal tie, like something silver or white (again, not black, but whatever) and monochromatic? Should I call the rental (gasp) places to see if they can do a same-day job? Should I stay at home and prepare for the Super Bowl? Are actual fashion questions discussed on this board?

I go to more of these things than I care to count. There are always a handful of people who for whatever reason don't wear black tie, and they always stand out. Do what bold'n'brazen suggests, but ONLY if you're totally comfortable with it. You have an iron clad excuse ("I live in another city, last minute invite") and you will be forgiven for the fashion error, but only to people who you explain it to. If you're going to be self-concious about it, skip the event and get ready for the Superbowl. That said, the Heart Ball generally is a lot of fun (I have a soft spot for cardiologists), and it'd be a shame to miss it if you're into that sort of thing.

Your girlfriend needs a reminder that you need warning on these things and/or that she needs to only accept invitations to visual art functions. Starving artists don't own/wear tuxes, so no one makes the artist events black tie.

Disease functions are always stuffy, though the silent auctions are generally good. Though if I recall correctly, the Heart Ball here in Houston always has some breathtaking red gowns, and the dancing is usually pretty fun. Disease functions are almost always black tie. Symphony, opera and ballet functions are almost always black tie. Theater functions could go either way depending on size and audience (TUTS blacktie, IBP probably not, Alley could go either way).

ETadd things in the above and A: Shelby Hodges has a nice guide for figuring out variuos party attires, and she points out that the Heart Ball (at least here) is a splashy event: http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssistory...shodge/2761847

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Disease functions are always stuffy, though the silent auctions are generally good. Though if I recall correctly, the Heart Ball here in Houston always has some breathtaking red gowns, and the dancing is usually pretty fun.

Have fun. Based upon the Heart Ball I attended here a few years ago, you are in for witnessing some serious trophy wife talent. (And trophy husband, too -- one of the chick doctors on the local AHA board was escorted by this guy who looked like Lorenzo Lamas without a mullet. My wife was impressed.)

As for what to wear, it all depends upon the community standards. I'd listen to RT on the attire advice -- the one here had about only about 30 to 40% of the men in tuxes, but it sounds like it's more along the lines of 80% and up in your neck of the woods.

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
Honestly, the man I took as my date to my brother's black-tie wedding did not wear a tux. What I remember most about what he wore that night was that he looked hot and I was sort of impressed that he had the guts to wear it.

Translation:

[Diane_Keaton]

Originally posted by Not Bob
...the Heart Ball I attended ... -- one of the chick doctors on the local AHA board was escorted by this guy who looked like Lorenzo Lamas without a mullet. My wife was impressed.)

If SS has already been to this thing already he should know what to where. Hmph.

Well, hopefully his disappearance from the board means right now, he's standing proud in a gorgeous new haute couture tux, and a very pretty Mexican American woman has her hand between his legs, pulling and smoothing, pinching and fussing at him. And all he can think of is that he has Diane Keaton to thank for it all.

(I know this seamstress thing was discussed before but my memory fails me.)

DK

[Shape Shifter]

Thanks all for the responses.

DK, that was solid advice. It is always tempted to me to drop money on nice clothes. However, I do not attend, nor do I aspire to attend, enough of these sorts of things to make the purchase of a new tux + accessories worth it.

I think I could have made the suit work if I had access to the rest of my wardrobe. It is a deep blue that looks black in most light, and I think I could have made it work for this with a french cuffed shirt, monochrome tie, and more formal shoes than what I have here.

We discussed my not going, but it would have looked bad to have empty seats at her firm's table. So I am off to rent clothing. The last time I rented shoes, I got to bowl. Blech.

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
"Karma" is the reason you walk into walls at night.

I'm not up on my drug-slang anymore. What is karma? I'm still catching up with terms like kronic.

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
We discussed my not going, but it would have looked bad to have empty seats at her firm's table. So I am off to rent clothing. The last time I rented shoes, I got to bowl. Blech.

Never fear. You will look sharp as a tack, my friend.

[Dave]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Okay, this may be totally outable, but I live in Houston ...

There's your first mistake.




Kidding. Only kidding.

[Mr. Man]

Originally posted by Dave
There's your first mistake.




Kidding. Only kidding.

I think you mean: "Kidding. Only kidding. Fattie."

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Okay, this may be totally outable, but I live in Houston, and my gf lives in Austin. I am planning to move to Austin, but have not found suitable employment there yet. Nevertheless, I travel to Austin most weekends, and I am in Austin now.

We are attending some charity event, the Heart Ball (ball, heh) tomorrow night. I just found out that it is black tie. I did not bring a tux with me. I have a midnight blue Calvin Klein 3 button suit with me. I brought a red tie with a subtle pattern, thinking this would be Valentiney, but obviously it is not black.

Can I cure this by buying a more formal tie, like something silver or white (again, not black, but whatever) and monochromatic? Should I call the rental (gasp) places to see if they can do a same-day job? Should I stay at home and prepare for the Super Bowl? Are actual fashion questions discussed on this board?

You could buy a very fancy white shirt and a black tie and pass. That would be better than going rental, I would think.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by ironweed
Never fear. You will look sharp as a tack, my friend.

Yeah, I know. The tux is an obvious rental and feels reminiscent of my high school Concert Chorus attire. I probably would've looked better with my suit, but I'll stand out less in this thing. Hopefully the wine is good and plentiful.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Thanks all for the responses.

DK, that was solid advice. It is always tempted to me to drop money on nice clothes. However, I do not attend, nor do I aspire to attend, enough of these sorts of things to make the purchase of a new tux + accessories worth it.

I think I could have made the suit work if I had access to the rest of my wardrobe. It is a deep blue that looks black in most light, and I think I could have made it work for this with a french cuffed shirt, monochrome tie, and more formal shoes than what I have here.

We discussed my not going, but it would have looked bad to have empty seats at her firm's table. So I am off to rent clothing. The last time I rented shoes, I got to bowl. Blech.

Gutless wimp. I like BnB's advice. OWN the suit. Don't explain. Don't apologize. Count your blesssings if you don't get crabs.