Fashion Board 12-09-03 through 1-08-04

[str8outavannuys]

Sports Guy mentioned Michael Madsen's book of poetry. So I looked it up on Amazon.com, and found a hilarious review. So then I checked out other reviews by this user. It's kind of in the "ninjas are sweet" vein.

Anyways, click on the best reviews ever

Example: review of "Clash of the Titans"

"This is my favorite Harry Hamlin movie. I like when he plays Perseus and has the sword. I get mad when he loses things, like when he loses his helmet and when he looses his shield. Just because he kills Medusa doesn't mean he can be careless. I like when he solves Andromeda's riddle and gets to marry her. He beats the Kraken like I beat Sephiroth in Final Fantasy 7. Harry Hamiln should have had a bigger career: this could have been his "Conan." Then he could be governor, too. If you like Marc Singer in Beastmaster, you'll love Harry Hamlin in this movie. Also, this movie is on TV sometimes. If you don't want to buy it right now, you can watch it on TV. It's probably on right now. I think you should buy this movie though and pretend that it's on TV. You can say, "I think I'll watch some TV, I wonder if Clash of the Titans is on." Then you can put it in the DVD player and watch it pretending that you're watching TBN."

I don't think this is at all affiliated with sweet ninjas

[Can you hear me now?]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Did you not read this part?: "The truth apparently turns off drunk, horny 21-year Portland State students just returned from a year studying in Salzburg. "

Whatever. The truth of 31 doesn't appear to turn them off.

Maybe it was his cologne. Or his breath.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I thought it was great until the whole...

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...fade-in/fade-out sequences at the end...and by the end I mean 45 minutes of FADE-IN/FADE-OUT christ my knees hurt is this over yet. I don't give a shit that Sam got married.

Good. Not great.

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Yes. The reaction here was "they cut out all resolution on the Saruman* but kept in all of this?!"

*yes, I fucking had to google to figure out his name


***Completely unrelated side conversation that interests no one but that is easier to include here than it would be for me to multipost while trying to catch up ----> thanks for the linky, Ty.***

[Skeks in the city]

Originally posted by robustpuppy

Don't even get me started on Reese Witherspoon.

Kiera is nothing like Witherspoon. Her, Elijah Wood, Christina Ricci and some others have looks so odd that they actually interfere with the watchability of their movies.

[Dave]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Why do you do it?
What drives your relentless devotion to famous Daves?

It's the sauce.

Thank you, I'll be here all week, at least for those of you in the upper midwest.

I appreciate the ode, nonetheless. Well up there on my list of favorite holiday moments, just below the last portion of that bottle of expensive vodka.

Da (I will forswear the internet before ever using anyone as toolish as Dave Grohl as my avatar, and yes, Dave Foley is still the greatest) ve

[Can you hear me now?]

Originally posted by Skeks in the city
Originally posted by robustpuppy



Kiera is nothing like Witherspoon. Her, Elijah Wood, Christina Ricci and some others have looks so odd that they actually interfere with the watchability of their movies.

How about Wood as Frodo, how was that distracting?

[Fugee]

Originally posted by leagleaze
You know those things you put around the bottom of your wine glass as decorations? I was given a set. It was very sweet and all, I just have no clue what I will do with them.

They're not for decoration; they're for identification. Do you never have parties where people are drinking from wine glasses when they aren't sitting at the table? It's cold and flu season -- you don't want to drink from the glass of anyone with whom you are not otherwise swapping spit. Wine charms are much "classier" than the paper tags.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive

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Yes. The reaction here was "they cut out all resolution on the Saruman* but kept in all of this?!"

As someone who has a familial connection to the Lord of the Rings trilogy (outable, sorry, though if we ever meet IRL it's obvious -- no, not hairy feet), has read them numerous times and recycled that book report just as often, almost the last half of the third book is devoted to that sort of wrapup. Just like much of the first is used to set up the story. If the extended version of the DVD is like the first two, Return of the King's extended version will clock in at well over 4 hours.

I kind of wish the Scouring of the Shire was depicted, but also understand why it is not. Also, while Saruman needed a better wrapup, I thought his parts in the first two films were actually a bit inflated.

Won't be seeing Return of the King for a few days, but based on Peter Jackson's previous two efforts I'm sure I'll enjoy it unless he adds a song and dance number for Sauron or something stupid like that. My only real beefs with the story so far are the expanded role for Arwen and the whole Aragorn dream sequence/miraculous horse rescue in the Two Towers.

This is one subject on which I definitely plead guilty to absolute nerddom.

[Fugee]

The only thing close to a bad present (the icky letter was sent to my parents, not me) is a bag of pot pourri I got from "Santa." I don't care for pot pourri and my cat would throw it around the house. My best presents were two things I've wanted but never got around to buying: an insulated casserole carrier and a pepper mill.

[Skeks in the city]

Originally posted by Can you hear me now?

How about Wood as Frodo, how was that distracting?

Maybe it was his pointy nose. Maybe it was that he's cross eyed. Maybe it was that his iris' are just the right color to give him a washed out complexion. Or maybe it was just that he looks like a grotesque overgrown 12-year old with a receding hairline.

Ricci managed to look worse in "Sleep Hollow" but that's not saying much.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by Fugee
The only thing close to a bad present (the icky letter was sent to my parents, not me) is a bag of pot pourri I got from "Santa." I don't care for pot pourri and my cat would throw it around the house. My best presents were two things I've wanted but never got around to buying: an insulated casserole carrier and a pepper mill.

I went home to Toronto and got three presents. They were all sets of coasters.

Came home and my wife's mother had bought her a creme brulee set. This despite the fact that she (my wife) had received a creme brulee set at her bridal shower. A real banner year at the ole Bender household.

Best presents: all from the wife.
Aqua Teen Hunger Force T-Shirt from Hot Topic
Brak T-Shirt from Hot Topic
Monkey-butler pen-holder from Bombay Co.
Monkey-butler business card holder from Bombay Co.

[idle acts]

Originally posted by Fugee
They're not for decoration; they're for identification. Do you never have parties where people are drinking from wine glasses when they aren't sitting at the table? It's cold and flu season -- you don't want to drink from the glass of anyone with whom you are not otherwise swapping spit. Wine charms are much "classier" than the paper tags.

Just why is it that one would not have one's glass in one's hand at all times during such an event? (cause if it's an event where you need your hands free for extended periods of time, you should be comfortable drinking out of whatever glass comes to hand)

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
As someone who has a familial connection to the Lord of the Rings trilogy (outable, sorry, though if we ever meet IRL it's obvious -- no, not hairy feet), has read them numerous times and recycled that book report just as often, almost the last half of the third book is devoted to that sort of wrapup. Just like much of the first is used to set up the story. If the extended version of the DVD is like the first two, Return of the King's extended version will clock in at well over 4 hours.

When certain family members bitched a little too much about the length of the ending, I hauled out the books to demonstrate how many inches of text were condensed into the whole thing.

I've heard that the extended-extended version of the whole shebang will reach 19 hours.

I'm pretty sure that the Shire sequences were filmed and will make the extended-extended edition. They were shown in the first movie, when Frodo looks into the mirror.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Skeks in the city
Originally posted by robustpuppy
Christina Ricci and some others have looks so odd that they actually interfere with the watchability of their movies.

Ms. Ricci is perhaps the sexiest "real woman" looking woman in film today.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by Skeks in the city
Try "four button". Three button is more traditional than two button.

You think you're accurate with the hyphens, but I think you've missed some unit modifiers.

Tell it to Mrs. Howell.


See the eye roll? That's an indicator that I don't really give a fuck how many buttons are on a man's tuxedo.