Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[soup sandwich]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
The c-word implies that I am nothing better than a receptacle for sperm.

Then my question would be: does being called a "dick" imply I am nothing better than a sperm provider?

And if it did mean this, why would this bother me, a man, less than it would bother you, a woman, being referred to as a sperm-receptacle? They're both equally asinine insults. I couldn't give two shits if someone tried to imply I was nothing more than a sperm-giver.

I guess I'm just wondering why you would give the word "cunt" so much power. It simply means that a person is really rotten. Richard Gere used it perfectly in An Officer and a Gentleman.

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Does anyone know chicks who shorten words because they think it sounds cool? My wife has some friends who like to cut pieces off words during conversations and it drives me up a wall. For example, they'll say "Mary and I had a convo the other day" meaning "Mary and I had a conversation the other day".

I really feel the need to say "Your slang makes you sound like you're challenged, my dear... its not cute". Just an FYI - if you do this word shortening thing, people probably ask each other what the hell is the matter with you behind your back.

Oh, fuck. That's bound to start another battle with paigow. She's still not over your last one.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Sport coat w/ t-shirt leads to outrage in S. Korea parliament:

http://www.boston.com/dailynews/120/..._seeks_:.shtml

And I defend my dislike of "cunt" vs. "dick." The only way to really demean a guy on the basis of his sexuality is to imply that he's not masculine enough--that he's feminine or gay ("pussy", "fag"). "Cunt" and "slut" demean a woman because she's sexual and female--quite different. It's not a question of delicacy--I can swear like a sailor--it's a question of a woman being sexual itself being a negative.

"Dick" is too casual to compare to "cunt"--different levels of insult.

PJ,

And dick is not similarly derogatory toward men because? Your saying that accepting male genitalia as a way to describe a person whos is a real asshole does not degrade males or contain negative implications about their genitals? Like dicks are not ugly enough the way it is... we need them to become a way of describing the worst in our society. As the owner of a dick, I find that hurtful. I'm not some kind of freak - I'm a man with feelings.

"Cunt" has nothing d=to do with a woman's sexuality at all. When I call a chick a cunt, I mean she's a rotten piece of shit - just as TM said - the female equivalent of an asshole.

Now re: "slut" - you're abolutely right. That's an unfair sexist term which I'd never be caught dead using. Men bitch and moan about never getting laid, then use stupid terms like whore and slut to demean women. Those dumbass men don't realize that in making women's sexuality and chasteness the measuring stick for insult, these dumb fucks decrease their own chances of getting laid. Women would fuck a lot more and these men would not be the frustrated fucks they are if they'd shut their mouths and not be so fucking afraid of women who are sexually aggressive.

S(Why men disparage sexually aggressive chicks is beyond me - it makes absolutely no sense - my guess is its fragile male ego shit)D

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by spookyfish
Oh, fuck. That's bound to start another battle with paigow. She's still not over your last one.

Sppoky,

1. That earlier "fight" (there really never was one) was me getting off my meds.

2. You can't goad anyone into getting into a fight with a post like yours.

3. I've never seen her shorten words, so I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

4. Shortening words in the text on a chat board is titally acceptable - my comments were directed exclusively at the shortening of words in actual conversation.

SD

[ms. naughty diplomat]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
And dick is not similarly derogatory toward men because? D

:eyeroll: maybe its because you can find men named dick, but you can't find women named cunt.

thus if i call you dick sebby, i could be simply calling you the wrong name, but if you call me cunt, i'd be sure that you are insulting me.

ms. naughty diplomat

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield [I like the word fuck.]

Sebby,

Your post just reminded me that I had a dream about you last night. You were my boss and you caught me surfing the internet. One of the open windows was on the Gap's webpage (as if!), and I pointed out that the Gap was using your signature to sell pants. Right there on the webpage in big bold pink letters it said, "Changing pants, one leg at a time."

There was more to the dream but that was, uh, the weirdest part. Vy do you sink zee letters vere pink?

edited to add: on the shortening words thing ... I had a roommate in college who called the library "the berry." What a left tail (there was an apparent glitch in the admissions process). I wanted to slap her, for that and so many reasons.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by leagleaze
Why is it always good when I am watching Buffy, and bad when Buffy is a rerun so I am watching AI?

Why?

spoiler space.

Was anyone else watching last night surprisingly satisfied to see the Scoobies et al telling Buffy to stick it where the sun don't shine? I was SO pleased to see each of the leads get in at least one good kick to the slats. Particularly, I was glad to see someone acknowledge that Buffy has sort of become the "All Spike All The Time Show" by saying to Buffy the magic words "It's not about Spike, it's about you." I have renewed hope for the finale if JW is addressing head on how annoying and unsupportable his characters' personality tics and obsessions have gotten.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by spookyfish
This makes me think of something that was the topic of a recent discussion. I don't know how it didn't make my radar before (probably because I've never heard occasion of it actually being used), but a woman can sue for defamation on the basis of a lack of "chastity", but a man can't. I assume from your comments that you think that is an appropriate double-standard?

Have you ever heard of someone actually suing for that reason?

PJ -- just to be clear, I'm not challenging your position on the subject, I'd just like to hear your opinion on it.

No, I'm dead against allowing someone to sue over defamation for implying a lack of chastity--my whole point is that a woman being sexual should be viewed exactly as positively as it is for a man, so I won't support anything that implies that a double-standard is acceptable.

And Sebby, I'm with Anne Elk on the "c-word." Just like street harassment, it's often used as an implied sexual derogation and threat of violent action. The "d-word" simply doesn't have the same connotations and is generally used as a milder insult in milder situations. It's sexual, but just not used quite the same way.

p(suddenly thought of the implications if the boss walked in to notice a bunch of graphic sexual terms all over my computer screen)j

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Sppoky,

2. You can't goad anyone into getting into a fight with a post like yours.

3. I've never seen her shorten words, so I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

4. Shortening words in the text on a chat board is titally acceptable - my comments were directed exclusively at the shortening of words in actual conversation.

SD

Seb,

2. It wasn't meant to goad. Just a warning. I find such fights tiresome, personally.

3. I have. Particularly convo.

4. a. Agreed. Typing's a pain in the ass.

b. Can't comment on whether used in conversations, but it
has been used on the board for I suspect, precisely the effect
you were complaining about.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by soup sandwich
Then my question would be: does being called a "dick" imply I am nothing better than a sperm provider?

And if it did mean this, why would this bother me, a man, less than it would bother you, a woman, being referred to as a sperm-receptacle? They're both equally asinine insults. I couldn't give two shits if someone tried to imply I was nothing more than a sperm-giver.

I guess I'm just wondering why you would give the word "cunt" so much power. It simply means that a person is really rotten. Richard Gere used it perfectly in An Officer and a Gentleman.

Words have power. It's not so much the literal meaning of the words, but all the cultural baggage that goes along with it. The chicks here have a point that calling someone a cunt is different from calling someone a dick, even though they are both slang words for gender specific and sexually related body parts.

Look at it this way -- the n-word is a disparaging word used to describe black people, and cracker is a disparaging word used to describe white people. Both are slurs directed towards skin color. Would you agree that I am probably less likely to be bothered by being called a cracker than TM would be bothered by being called the n-word?

(edited to add the "probably" part)

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
spoiler space.

Was anyone else watching last night surprisingly satisfied to see the Scoobies et al telling Buffy to stick it where the sun don't shine? I was SO pleased to see each of the leads get in at least one good kick to the slats. Particularly, I was glad to see someone acknowledge that Buffy has sort of become the "All Spike All The Time Show" by saying to Buffy the magic words "It's not about Spike, it's about you." I have renewed hope for the finale if JW is addressing head on how annoying and unsupportable his characters' personality tics and obsessions have gotten.

Yes, her speeches had gotten over the top, she messed up when she took the SITs into the place with the crazy dude, no surprise they didn't want to go back and die again. And lord knows if she says Spike is good because he has a sooooul one more time. Gonna kick my tv set.

I haven't found the show as compelling as I used to, I frequently find myself working on my computer or reading a book instead of paying attention.

It has gotten so focused on Buffy angst and Spike whatever that it hasn't been the ensemble show that made it strong in the first place. Hopefully they can clean it up so it has a satisfactory ending. We'll see.

[Bad_Rich_Chic]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Sport coat w/ t-shirt leads to outrage in S. Korea parliament:

http://www.boston.com/dailynews/120/..._seeks_:.shtml

I agree with the outraged, frankly. It is insulting to those around you when you dress with a level of formality lower than that which you know is expected. Clothing is never just about comfort (if it were it would be optional in all essentials), it is about communicating attitudes of respect and/or conformity to others (and establishing status). I understand why this particular guy did it from a semiotic p.o.v., but, as he helpfully pointed out, he was elected to change old standards through his policies, not his clothing. (Besides, he could have had precisely the same "shocking" effect, without giving cause for insult, by wearing a blue or olive suit or wearing a colored shirt (though departing from white collar is more iffy).)

The implication that sartorial (or social) conservatism is at odds with a modern, westernized economy was strange.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Does anyone know chicks who shorten words because they think it sounds cool? My wife has some friends who like to cut pieces off words during conversations and it drives me up a wall. For example, they'll say "Mary and I had a convo the other day" meaning "Mary and I had a conversation the other day". Another I heard was the use of the term "vag" for vagina - they seem to think that sounds cute. The worst is when they shorten "whatever" to "whatev" - I can barely hold my tongue when they speak like that to me. I really feel the need to say "Your slang makes you sound like you're challenged, my dear... its not cute". Just an FYI - if you do this word shortening thing, people probably ask each other what the hell is the matter with you behind your back.

I know a few GIRLS who do this. They are younger than most of us though (mostly 22-25), which means I am inherently attracted to them.

My guy friends will sometimes refer to a another guy as a "vag" b/c he's going to Home Depot with the wife instead of playing poker with the boys.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

This argument:

Originally posted by purse junkie
"Cunt" and "slut" demean a woman because she's sexual and female--quite different. It's not a question of delicacy--I can swear like a sailor--it's a question of a woman being sexual itself being a negative.

doesn't mesh with this one:

Originally posted by purse junkie
"Dick" is too casual to compare to "cunt"--different levels of insult.

"Dick" is just as gender specific as "cunt." And calling someone a "cunt" isn't necessarily a comment about said woman's sexual nature. If I don't know a thing about your sexual history, I can call you a cunt based on how you've interacted with me. It's about attitude. "Slut" demeans a woman based on her sexual experience (perceived or real).

"Dick" is the same as "cunt" as far as the nature of the insult is concerned. "Cunt" may be more extreme or harsh, but you can't say you can't compare the two because one is a more accepted insult.

TM

[soup sandwich]

Originally posted by Not Bob
Words have power. It's not so much the literal meaning of the words, but all the cultural baggage that goes along with it. The chicks here have a point that calling someone a cunt is different from calling someone a dick, even though they are both slang words for gender specific and sexually related body parts.

Look at it this way -- the n-word is a disparaging word used to describe black people, and cracker is a disparaging word used to describe white people. Both are slurs directed towards skin color. Would you agree that I am less bothered by being called a cracker than TM would be bothered by being called the n-word?

I agree with you regarding how words can have power and how two people can view it differently. My question in this case is why view it differently? Why make the meaning of the word worse than it is intended to be?

In your n-word example, I think the difference is that when the n-word is used, both the user and the recipient know what is being communicated. It is clear. When a white calls a black the n-word, blacks and whites do not assign different meanings to it.

But, if I were to refer to a woman as a cunt, it would mean that she is a really rotten, awful person. NOT that she is simply a sperm-receptacle. Men and women assign different meanings to the word. I was just wondering why.