Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
I am thinking of painting my bedroom walls a deep dusky pinkish color.

I am afraid my room will look like the inside of a vagina.

Many men will find it strangely comforting. Even before you fuck them.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
So your plan is to post news items, but off-beat ones? That way you'll always be seen as smarter than at least NFH. Good strategy. Did someone help you come up with the plan?

What is this obsession you have where you have to call out my (fake) name in every other post?

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
My uterus trains hard. Got Gatorade?

I guess it's in you.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
FWIW, a google images search turns up a whole bunch of photoshopped images of Amanda Peet having lots of sex.

This strikes me as a good time to remiond you about the Adult Board, which has been pitifully moribund lo these many days.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
What is this obsession you have where you have to call out my (fake) name in every other post?

"When NFH saw Hank, he cried out, and fell down before him, and with a loud voice said, What have I to do with thee, Hank, thou sock of Penske, most high? I beseech thee, torment me not. (For he had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For oftentimes it had caught him: and he was kept bound with chains and in fetters; and he brake the bands, and was driven of the devil into the wilderness.) And Hank asked him, saying, What is thy name? And he said, Not from Here: because many devils were entered into him. And they besought him that he would not command them to go out into the deep. And there was there an herd of many swine feeding on the mountain: and they besought him that he would suffer them to enter into them. And he suffered them. Then went the devils out of the man, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the lake, and were choked. When they that fed them saw what was done, they fled, and went and told it in the city and in the country. Then they went out to see what was done; and came to Jesus, and found the man, out of whom the devils were departed, sitting at the feet of Hank, clothed, and in his right mind: and they were afraid. They also which saw it told them by what means he that was possessed of the devils was healed."

Originally posted by Not Bob
From overheard at the office . . .

That's Quite a Euphemism for Sex with Pale Fat Chicks

Lobbyist #1: You remember how it was in school...drinking, gambling,
and being investigated by the IRA.
Lobbyist #2: Don't you mean the IRS?
Lobbyist #1: No, the IRA. Irish Republican Army.

Hart Senate Office Building
Washington, DC

The IRA's most feared division was always their forensic accountants. Before the cease-fire Belfast was no place for a shady CFO.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Assuming that he pops right back up after deflating, is three 10-min fucks really that much different than a single half-hour fuck? I don't think so. Of course, this may be one example of how I have low, low standards.

If it was 3 10-min fucks spread over 24 hours, though, THAT's a problem.

Your inconsistency confounds me. Do you want 10 min sex or 30 min sex? Just two weeks ago, I got clocked for bragging about being able to fuck for extended periods of time. I believe the criticism was that such fucking was boring, and that, when you go that long, women "just want it to be over with." Now, if I understand your post, which its highly probable I don't (since 90% of what is posted by all posters here is subject to numerous meanings), you're claiming the ten minute fuck is not as good as the half hour fuck.

If I fucked you three times in one day, half an hour each time, there would be boredom and soreness issues. I'm not saying fucking three times a day for extended periods is bad. Even when its boring, sex beats, say, reading the paper or cleaning the cat litter. I'm only noting that half hour sex appears to be exactly the sort of sex you and some others said they didn't want last week.

Actually, I don't know what the hell I was saying... But I think I might have made a point. Or maybe not.

"It was the best of times, it was the 'blurst' of times?! Idiot monkeys!"

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by taxwonk
This strikes me as a good time to remiond you about the Adult Board, which has been pitifully moribund lo these many days.

This is a good time for me to remind you of Carla Pivonski, who you will discover, if you run a google image search, has simply astounding breasts. She is hotter than goatse, which is fucking hot.

Spreee: Don't search for goatse at work.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Your inconsistency confounds me. Do you want 10 min sex or 30 min sex? Just two weeks ago, I got clocked for bragging about being able to fuck for extended periods of time. I believe the criticism was that such fucking was boring, and that, when you go that long, women "just want it to be over with." Now, if I understand your post, which its highly probable I don't (since 90% of what is posted by all posters here is subject to numerous meanings), you're claiming the ten minute fuck is not as good as the half hour fuck.

If I fucked you three times in one day, half an hour each time, there would be boredom and soreness issues. I'm not saying fucking three times a day for extended periods is bad. Even when its boring, sex beats, say, reading the paper or cleaning the cat litter. I'm only noting that half hour sex appears to be exactly the sort of sex you and some others said they didn't want last week.

Actually, I don't know what the hell I was saying... But I think I might have made a point. Or maybe not.

"It was the best of times, it was the 'blurst' of times?! Idiot monkeys!"

No. I was saying that three 10-min stints are essentially the same as one 30-min stint. Personally, I would prefer three 10-min stints with little breaks in between.

One 10-min stint can be kind of annoying.

In any event, YOU are not permitted to be confounded by inconsistency. Inconsistency is the basis of your entire persona.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
"When NFH saw Hank, he cried out, and fell down before him, and with a loud voice said, What have I to do with thee, Hank, thou sock of Penske, most high? I beseech thee, torment me not. (For he had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For oftentimes it had caught him: and he was kept bound with chains and in fetters; and he brake the bands, and was driven of the devil into the wilderness.) And Hank asked him, saying, What is thy name? And he said, Not from Here: because many devils were entered into him. And they besought him that he would not command them to go out into the deep. And there was there an herd of many swine feeding on the mountain: and they besought him that he would suffer them to enter into them. And he suffered them. Then went the devils out of the man, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the lake, and were choked. When they that fed them saw what was done, they fled, and went and told it in the city and in the country. Then they went out to see what was done; and came to Jesus, and found the man, out of whom the devils were departed, sitting at the feet of Hank, clothed, and in his right mind: and they were afraid. They also which saw it told them by what means he that was possessed of the devils was healed."

What do you think your chances are that people will read this?

TM

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
No. I was saying that three 10-min stints are essentially the same as one 30-min stint. Personally, I would prefer three 10-min stints with little breaks in between.

One 10-min stint can be kind of annoying.

In any event, YOU are not permitted to be confounded by inconsistency. Inconsistency is the basis of your entire persona.

The lack of clarity in your posts has cost my wife approximately 40 min of sex in the past week.

If you find a guy who does three ten minute "sprints" with only a few minutes in between each, marry him. When I'm done, I'm usually a bit sore. And I'm totally turned off (every guy immediately loses all libido momentarily as soon as he's come - thats just how it works). I need a little while to get wound up again. At a bare minimum, you need a few minutes to deflate, and for that feeling of hypersensitivity to go away. If you touch a guy's package right after he's come, thats going to cause pain (this is why, when you kept blowing your HS sweetheart after he came, he jerked away and screamed "What the fuck are you doing?"... I won't even touch on the pain inflicted by a HS GF who doesn't know when to stop giving a handjob...). A guy who can overcome that and jump right back in the saddle (without rubbing coke on his cock or some crap like that) is a cat you should marry. Even if he looks like Danny DeVito and Paul Giamatti's love child.

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
What do you think your chances are that people will read this?

TM

Greater now that you've quoted it so all the people that have him on ignore can now see it.

[Not Bob]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
The lack of clarity in your posts has cost my wife approximately 40 min of sex in the past week.

"Cost"? Nah. She was happier with the hair compliments, anyway.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
The lack of clarity in your posts has cost my wife approximately 40 min of sex in the past week.

If you find a guy who does three ten minute "sprints" with only a few minutes in between each, marry him. When I'm done, I'm usually a bit sore. And I'm totally turned off (every guy immediately loses all libido momentarily as soon as he's come - thats just how it works). I need a little while to get wound up again. At a bare minimum, you need a few minutes to deflate, and for that feeling of hypersensitivity to go away. If you touch a guy's package right after he's come, thats going to cause pain (this is why, when you kept blowing your HS sweetheart after he came, he jerked away and screamed "What the fuck are you doing?"... I won't even touch on the pain inflicted by a HS GF who doesn't know when to stop giving a handjob...). A guy who can overcome that and jump right back in the saddle (without rubbing coke on his cock or some crap like that) is a cat you should marry. Even if he looks like Danny DeVito and Paul Giamatti's love child.

Like 15 or 20 min between. And he has 2 kids from a prior marriage, and absolutely no interest in monogamy. I'm OK with non-monogamy (as long as I'm getting enough) but the kids are a dealbreaker.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Not Bob
"Cost"? Nah. She was happier with the hair compliments, anyway.

Compliment my wife on her hair? Its long, its blonde, its been the same since I've known her. She'd see right through that bullshit and ask me what I'd broken, lost or neglected to pay that month.