It's all about me

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Not Scandinavian (Brazilan), but ass-slapping and Olympic beach volleyball related:



The Netherlands (closer!):

I'm beginning to feel the Olympic spirit. Please hold my calls.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
If you watched the Penn & Teller Bullshit episode on Showtime regarding cuss words, you would be aware that the cyclist should have used both hands to form the shape of an entire bird. It's the new giving the finger in prudish housewife circles everywhere. I'm guessing I'm the only person who saw this, thus making the reference that much less funny. Thank you.

Santa Vaca! I swear to Bhudda if you don't stop it, I going to give you the turkey.

(I saw it, too)

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
I will defer to gwink on all issues regarding Scandanavian Women's* Doubles Swimsuited Ass-Slapping.

*dtb?

Finally some respect.
My official position is that I'm in favour of it.

[taxwonk]

A friend of Mrs. Wonk lives in LA and needs an inexpensive IP person to help her with licensing and royalty issues for a new business venture.

PM me or email mabg922@comcast.net

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
More sports? The Olympics is cluttered up enough with sports I've never heard of and endless variations of the ones I do know. So many of the events are so trivial that any new world records in the event should just be logged in to the Guiness Book and the gold saved for a more useful purpose, like for Ali G. Why do we need Women's Beach Volleyball? There is already Women's Volleyball. I appreciate Women's Doubles Swimsuited Ass-Slapping as much as the next guy, but why does it have to be an Olympic Event?

What the hell else do trampolinists have to keep themselves going?







I hear ltl is looking for a teamate for the synchronized eating competition, but has not yet been able to find someone who can keep up her record pace.

TM

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I hear ltl is looking for a teamate for the synchronized eating competition, but has not yet been able to find someone who can keep up her record pace.

TM

Really, why isn't the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest winner sporting an Olympic gold medal instead of, well, instead of whatever it is he got? I watched a few minutes of Doubles Badminton yesterday. I'll admit that they looked like they were really, really, really good badminton players. But who gets that good at badminton? How do they practice - are there other badminton players out there? If this is an Olympic event, why not horseshoes or lawn darts? Fuck, Olympic D&D would merit about the same cool factor as Doubles Badminton.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Really, why isn't the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest winner sporting an Olympic gold medal instead of, well, instead of whatever it is he got? I watched a few minutes of Doubles Badminton yesterday. I'll admit that they looked like they were really, really, really good badminton players. But who gets that good at badminton? How do they practice - are there other badminton players out there? If this is an Olympic event, why not horseshoes or lawn darts? Fuck, Olympic D&D would merit about the same cool factor as Doubles Badminton.

did they shed the cardigans tied around their shoulders for the final set? did you see dtb there?

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
Really, why isn't the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest winner sporting an Olympic gold medal instead of, well, instead of whatever it is he got? I watched a few minutes of Doubles Badminton yesterday. I'll admit that they looked like they were really, really, really good badminton players. But who gets that good at badminton? How do they practice - are there other badminton players out there? If this is an Olympic event, why not horseshoes or lawn darts? Fuck, Olympic D&D would merit about the same cool factor as Doubles Badminton.

I put on my robe and wizard hat.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
did they shed the cardigans tied around their shoulders for the final set?

Shhh. Cardigans are in; bondage pants are out (NY Times)

[ThurgreedMarshall]

[Long post, so skip if you don't want to read an Olympic-sized rant.]

Okay, I'm sick of this shit. Every year it gets worse. The Olympics needs to form a subsidiary that handles all of the Olympic Coverage. NBC fucking sucks large, not-female-beach-volleyball ass.

1. Enough with the forced drama. We don't need to know the background of every single American competitor. I don't give a shit if the guy has been swimming the breaststroke since he was four. In fact, I kind of assumed it. How the fuck else do you get to be the best in the world? His parents sacrificed? No shit. He had an injury at some point that he came back from? He's an athlete. Jesus.

The Olympics contains enough drama already. That's why it's so great. People want to see their countries do well. In fact, the best part is watching countries that are underdogs in every other aspect of their existence beat the shit out of the world super-powers. There's your drama. The competition is what I tune in for, not the filler. Who likes that crap? How about showing more events and less life-stories.

2. Yez, we're Americans. We get it. Let us cheer. We don't need the announcers constantly telling us where the American is in every single event. Once, at the beginning when you set out which countries are in the race and which lane each occupies is enough. I don't give a shit that the American is in 13th place in a 15 person race. I want to see the best in the world. Not the best American in the race.

So, recognize that this country is made up of people from all over the world who would love to see some coverage of events in which Americans might not have a shot to win. Hell, there are always some cool events I'd like to see that I normally wouldn't because that sport isn't popular here.

And when someone from another country does well, stop telling me that they train here, or that they live here or that their coach is from here or was taught by some great former American coach. I don't give a fuck. Neither does anyone else (with half a brain). The woman who is currently kicking everyone's ass in the event will be medaling for Romania, not the US. Stop trying to take credit for it.

(Last night, one of the commentators criticized the Japanese winner for ever-so-slightly, almost using a dolphin kick out of the turn in the breast stroke final. Uh...what? They showed it in slow motion and the guy talking was smoking crack. No dolphin kick. He straight up beat our guy's ass. Shut the fuck up and accept it. In fact, applaud him for being the better man. And stop making excuses for our guy who just lost. Jesus Christ.)

3. Put the fucking Olympics in high def, live, damnit. If I can watch numerous golf events, the Super Bowl and the NBA Finals in high def, you would think they could get this done in the largest sporting event in the world.

4. Do NOT mention Mark Spitz until someone is actually holding 4 or 5 gold medals. Fuck Phelps. He won one race out of the three he's been in. But before the first race, you were saying he had a chance to win 8 golds. Kiss my ass. Ridiculous expectations.

The thing that is cool about the Olympics is that people do things they aren't expected to do because they are competing for their country as well as themselves. It seems to give a good many people a little bit extra. That sense of pride won't be beaten down by the "underdog" label, no matter how many times you repeat it.

I assume other countries have coverage that is like ours (meaning, they focus way too much on their own citizens). Are there any major differences in coverage that make it a better experience elsewhere? Anybody?

TM

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Are there any major differences in coverage that make it a better experience elsewhere? Anybody?

TM

The CBC generally has better coverage because they show everything live and will frequently show a lot of events with non-Canadians. (however, they missed the US/PR game yesterday and are getting beat up for it) They are also less schmaltzy (although NBC has gotten better). However, when a Canadian does well, they are all over him or her, so not that much different from NBC in that respect. Perhaps Penske has a feed and can tell us whether the CBC is any good this year.

The BBC also used to be good (I watched the Atlanta Olympics on the BBC, and a little of Barcleona). I don't know how it is these days.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
1. Enough with the forced drama. We don't need to know the background of every single American competitor. I don't give a shit if the guy has been swimming the breaststroke since he was four. In fact, I kind of assumed it. How the fuck else do you get to be the best in the world? His parents sacrificed? No shit. He had an injury at some point that he came back from? He's an athlete. Jesus.

I'm curious if they will use the story about the U.S. woman swimmer (I think)* who killed her boyfriend and a teenager in an auto accident several months ago and who will be serving a jail sentence after the Olympics and how the kid who she (accidently) killed's family doesn't think that she should be allowed to delay her jail sentence until after the games. Maybe that one isn't uplifting enough.


*ETA: just remembered it is a U.S. woman synchronized swimmer.

EATA: here's a story about her: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5196638/

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
I was not inquiring about Switzerland. I attest to the fact that there are beaches in Norway because I have seen them with my own two eyes rather than a google search. They are quite sandy and lovely. I would recommend a visit. Do not question my knowledge.

In-laws are planning to go to Norway next summer and I very much want to go with them. If and when we plan the trip, I will try to remember to solicit beach recommendations from you. Should I try to see Sweden on the same trip, or should I spend it all in Norway?

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
The competition is what I tune in for, not the filler. Who likes that crap? How about showing more events and less life-stories.

The worldwide population of women is holding steady at 51%. Do you seriously think this is something NBC would continue to do without volumes of market research to back it up? Those little vignettes piss off sports fans, but the overall demographic for Olympics coverage doesn't consist of sports fans --- not even a majority. My mother watches the Olympics.

Whether she watches from the Liz Phair position is none of your beeswax, BTW.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
I will defer to gwink on all issues regarding Scandanavian Women's* Doubles Swimsuited Ass-Slapping.

*dtb?

Apropos of this and last week's poll, wasn't there a really dumb beer ad* a few year's back featuring the Swedish Bikini Team? (Or maybe that's the Finnish Bikini Team, since I seem to have problems with those two countries -- something I'm hoping a visit will straighten out.)

* Redundancy noted.