Fashion Board 11-2-03 - 12-09-03

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
And, as someone pointed out earlier, it suddenly becomes about something more than your needs, or your husbands needs, and becomes about the wee one's needs.

I seem to be the only one who thinks that people are losing their minds when it comes to their kids.

We need to examine the definition of "needs" when it comes to our kids. I think most everyone confuses things that they want or things that are nice and what we wished we had when we were kids, with what kids actually need.

Kids don't need:

• designer clothing
• every toy under the sun
• their parents to be together in the same house (especially when they're only doing it "for the kids")
• a bunch of extra-curricular activities and classes
• vacations
• lots of other stuff

Kids do need:

• love
• attention
• books
• to be pushed with regard to school work -- and if their school is insufficient, they need you to give them additional work
• time to just play
• sports or some other physical activity

Everyone thinks that children are so fucking fragile. They're not. You can't completely hide the world from them and you'll never be able to protect them from everything. Likewise, you can't expose them to everything under the sun that you wished you had been exposed to and weren't (or were).

If you don't get along with your spouse, you can't hide that from them. And staying together for them is the dumbest idea I can think of. Sure it's stressful if their parents break up. That's life. They'll have to learn to deal with it (and to the extent they need help with that, that's okay too), just like they'll have to learn how to deal with all the other disappointments in life.

We've turned into a country where parents run after their kids trying to keep them from getting dirty, eating dirt, getting bullied, seeing nudity, seeing violence, getting their feelings hurt, etc. That's why so many people are fucking unprepared for life. When I take my daughter to the park, you would be amazed at the parents who follow them around, keeping other kids from playing with their toys ("You tell him that's yours, Betty") and freak out if they fall down even though it's clear they haven't hurt themselves. They have to learn to interact with other fucking people. They have to learn how to play. They have to learn that if they try to be too daring, they'll get hurt. Leave them alone.

And if your kid shows any sign of being different than other kids, they get drugged. What ever happened to being a kid and playing? "Little Johnny can't sit still in class. He keeps playing and is easily distracted. I recommend Ritalin." Oh really? Fuck you. He's a little boy. Of course he can't concentrate. Of course he's easily distracted. That's the nature of kids. Stop being so fucking lazy and do your job. (Of course there are children who need help and would benefit from...blah, blah, blah.)

Kids are tough and resilient. They are little people, not china dolls. All this rejiggering because now you must live your life for your kids is ridiculous. Live your life for your family and that necessarily includes YOU. You should no more force yourself to do something uneccessary for them than you should force them to do something uneccessary for you. This is why it confuses me that people who don't want to work at a firm or force their wife or husband to work when they don't want to, to pay for private school, a bunch of lessons, equestrian training and expensive kids clothes, etc. Take a job that pays less, with lower demands on your time. Cut all that extra crap out and spend that time with your kids. If the school they're in sucks, supplement it. Don't drop an extra $15,000-30,000 a year.

People are stupid.

TM

[Pinky]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall

If you don't get along with your spouse, you can't hide that from them. And staying together for them is the dumbest idea I can think of. Sure it's stressful if their parents break up. That's life. They'll have to learn to deal with it (and to the extent they need help with that, that's okay too), just like they'll have to learn how to deal with all the other disappointments in life.

TM

I wish someone would have told my parents that. It's more stressful for the kids if the parents stay together when they're unhappy. We wanted my parents to break up. It would have made everybody's life a lot easier.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Rant

TM

Sebby?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
People are stupid.

I like this much better than whatever phrase paigow was bitching about the other day. You should use it more.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I Take a job that pays less, with lower demands on your time. Cut all that extra crap out and spend that time with your kids.

I thought you were hoping to get invited to more marketing activities outside normal hours?

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
kid stuff

I don't give a crap what parents do with their kids*, so long as they teach the little wankers manners. I expect kids to be unpredictable and noisy, and even to have the occasional shrieking public meltdown at a miserably inopportune time and place. But I also expect them to be corrected, not smiled at, for it and to be removed if they're spoiling my dinner or my movie.

Also, if God in its justice could make their high-pitched wailing feel just little less unpleasant than 10-inch nails being driven through my skull, I'd be grateful.


so long as they're not abusive, of course

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Heh heh. Actually, I did hold court at the jungle gym, but for purposes of enslaving the rest of the class to my magical powers. Somehow, I had them all convinced I was a powerful witch, and if I pointed at them and said "zap!" they had to lie down and not get up until I released them. (Apparently I was some sort of David-Koresh-like charismatic leader, or something - I freaked out a teacher when a couple of the kids refused to get up, because I hadn't released them, even when the teacher and principal ordered them to, big parent/teacher conference on that one - I wonder what happened to my all-powerful powers of persuasion? Or maybe I really did have magical powers, mou ha ha ha ha.) Anyhow, climbing the jungle gym gave me greater range, and I could cast my powers over a greater area of kids, and make them fall down and get up in waves as I spun around.

Maybe it was just the body odor you released when you raised your arm(s).

TM

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Not Me
Two things that are more fun than bitch-slapping opposing counsel over some issue you only pretend to really care about:

1. dropping ecstasy; and

2. having sex for the first time with someone you are extraordinarily physically attracted to (with or without dropping ecstasy).

Translation: It's going to be another lonely Friday night.

TM

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
That's basically what Wes said.

Why are you so nosejob obsessed? Is it possible that people's noses could just be shaped in a way that looks like a nosejob? And why do you care? Even if something screams Bad Nosejob to you, perhaps the person with that nose really likes it.**



** note: I have never had a nosejob, I have never had anyone mention to me that I might need a nosejob, and I have never given more than 5 minutes thought to either my nose or anyone elses.

I am NOT nosejob obsessed. Its just when I see a particuloarly awful one, and that one runs third behind Bloomberg and the guy from the tristate area whjo had a ski house where i did growing up. IT was quite notable for its sheer nostrilyness and it is burned on my memory. I was just trying to converse with you anyway. Nobody else was gonna reply to that post since I think we were the only two who watched the show. I really had nothing to ass but wanted to give us something to discuss. SO forgive me for being cybersocial. bitch.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
I seem to be the only one who thinks that people are losing their minds when it comes to their kids.

[RANT]childhood.[/RANT]

People are stupid.

TM

I tend to agree with you. I used to take the Brazenette to a playgroup at this one woman's house. I liked the other mommy's in the group. But then, I noticed that the woman who hosted the playgroup was constantly and furtively removing other baby's hands from her daughter and from her daughter's toys. As if their germs might contaminate her.

Sheesh. They're babies! It's in their nature to drool and mouth everything.

My mother constantly harps on me because I allow the Brazenette to crawl on the ground outside which gets her clothes dirty, I allow her to put rocks and mulch and grass in her mouth (although I've been known to fish it out) and I allow her to fall down all the time.

As a result, I have a daughter who appreciates that sun and grass and an afternoon outside with mommy is a pretty awesome way to pass the time. I have a duaghter who understands that gravity is a bitch sometimes, but who almost always manages to keep her head up when she take a tumble. I have a daughter who rarely cries, unless she's hurt herself bad.

I hope I'm raising a daughter who is fearless and adventurous. I've learned that an empty 2 liter soda bottle makes a damn fine toy, thank you very much. And I know its about the love and attention she gets, rather than the money or sacrafices I make.

edited to add: I'm not sure I had a point here, so I apologize...I started out wanting to add something but I think I ust ran out of steam.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by Not Me
Technically, it would be a bell curve, with 5 being the average person. However, most of us tend to set the average looks as at least one category below our own and that will affect the distribution. So, if you are not that cute but not ugly (in my opinion), I would put you at a 4, you will probably think of yourself as more of a 5 and perhaps on a good day a 6. Your curve will thus be skewed to have more people in the higher numbers than mine would.

A better way to assess your level of attractiveness and who you should seek out to date/marry is to assess the level of attractiveness of those members of the opposite sex who are attracted to your looks only. So this is a "who looks at you when you walk down the streets" assessment. You cannot factor personality into this, so don't take into account the people who know you and are attracted to you.

If you are a female, the best looking males of those who are attracted to you as you walk down the street are one looks category below you. You should focus your efforts on attracting men of a similar looks category as that. Don't waste time on the guys who are better looking than that because the chances are slim that they will be asking you to marry them.

If they have alot of money, you have to go 1 looks category below the best looking guys who are attracted to you when you walk down the street. The reason I say this is because guys who have alot of money want to be with women at least 2 looks categories above theirs. They think that their money entitles them to that.

Translation: I'm a 2.

TM

[Not Me]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
[obvious insights into what is wrong with the way far too many people raise their kids]

Agreed. The reason that many (almost all) people in over-fed non-agrarian based societies like the US have children is because they desperately want to have some meaning in their lives. When you no longer have to struggle against the elements and worry about how you are going to get enough to eat so that you won't die, you can spare a few minutes to ask yourself what the purpose of being alive is. So many (almost all) people in these over-fed non-agrarian based societies like the US have children to give them what they perceive to be meaning in their lives. The most laughable part of all about their pathetic existence is that, once the kids are here, they then proceed to continue to live even less meaningful lives (only they feel better about it).

This is why people like Sebby don't want to have kids. They don't crave a life with meaning.

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
People are stupid.

Agreed. The corallary to that is that kids are stupid. Stupid kids, are in fact, where stupid adults come from.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I am NOT nosejob obsessed. Its just when I see a particuloarly awful one, and that one runs third behind Bloomberg and the guy from the tristate area whjo had a ski house where i did growing up. IT was quite notable for its sheer nostrilyness and it is burned on my memory. I was just trying to converse with you anyway. Nobody else was gonna reply to that post since I think we were the only two who watched the show. I really had nothing to ass but wanted to give us something to discuss. SO forgive me for being cybersocial. bitch.

For the record, nostrilyness is a far grosser word than fleshy.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I am NOT nosejob obsessed. Its just when I see a particuloarly awful one, and that one runs third behind Bloomberg and the guy from the tristate area whjo had a ski house where i did growing up. IT was quite notable for its sheer nostrilyness and it is burned on my memory. I was just trying to converse with you anyway. Nobody else was gonna reply to that post since I think we were the only two who watched the show. I really had nothing to ass but wanted to give us something to discuss. SO forgive me for being cybersocial. bitch.

I forgive you.

I will take your word for it that it looks like a bad one. He seems pretty happy with it though. Mainly I will point out that he was my favorite from day one of the show (sure, he got a little cheesy during the latter parts of the show), so your words aimed him feel like a little jab at me too.* I could hook him up with some cute boys in Dallas (alas, I cannot do the same for you, because all my cute single male friends happent to be gay).

*not really

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
I tend to agree with you. I used to take the Brazenette to a playgroup at this one woman's house. I liked the other mommy's in the group. But then, I noticed that the woman who hosted the playgroup was constantly and furtively removing other baby's hands from her daughter and from her daughter's toys. As if their germs might contaminate her.

Sheesh. They're babies! It's in their nature to drool and mouth everything.

My mother constantly harps on me because I allow the Brazenette to crawl on the ground outside which gets her clothes dirty, I allow her to put rocks and mulch and grass in her mouth (although I've been known to fish it out) and I allow her to fall down all the time.

As a result, I have a daughter who appreciates that sun and grass and an afternoon outside with mommy is a pretty awesome way to pass the time. I have a duaghter who understands that gravity is a bitch sometimes, but who almost always manages to keep her head up when she take a tumble. I have a daughter who rarely cries, unless she's hurt herself bad.

I hope I'm raising a daughter who is fearless and adventurous. I've learned that an empty 2 liter soda bottle makes a damn fine toy, thank you very much. And I know its about the love and attention she gets, rather than the money or sacrafices I make.

You are too cool. The way so many parents simp-ify their daughters from birth makes me sick.:bow: