Fashion Board 12-09-03 through 1-08-04

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
basketball players will waste your time dribbling before dunking it into the hole

I used to have this reverse 360 thing that I would finish with a finger roll, but I can't get up enough for that anymore.

[Fugee]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
...basketball players will waste your time dribbling before dunking it into the hole.
TM

Could be a fun job. Sorry about the off-topic. I was going to post this on the IP Board but there hasn't been a new post in 30+ days.
http://jobline.acca.com/job.php?job=6686

Staff Attorney, National Basketball Association
Description
The Attorney, Intellectual Property assists in all IP matters handled by the Legal Department, including enforcement of company’s IP rights (including internet infringement and anti-counterfeiting), administration of trademark prosecution docket, management of IP litigations and research/client advice regarding IP issues (including trademark, copyright and right of publicity law).

Major Responsibilities

· Provide advice and assistance regarding IP issues arising in connection with various worldwide merchandising/consumer product initiatives

· Manage domestic and international litigations/arbitrations involving IP issues

· Oversee domestic and international IP rights enforcement program, including coordinating
investigations of counterfeiting and infringement on a global basis

· Conduct legal research and provide analysis and advice regarding all intellectual property matters

· Draft and negotiate IP-related agreements, including coexistence agreements, assignments, work for hire agreements, and settlement agreements

· Participate in quality control review of consumer products/packaging and marketing review of all advertising materials

· Conduct trademark search/clearance of all proposed league and team identities (including new logos, names, mascots, etc.)

· Supervise international and domestic registration and prosecution

· Provide advice and assistance in connection with Internet-related issues



Qualifications
Required Skills/Knowledge:

Strong current knowledge of substantive trademark and copyright law and procedures; computer skills; excellent research and writing, and communication skills; knowledge of IP litigation and litigation skills.

Experience Needed:

Approximately 7-8 years experience in the field of Intellectual Property (including trademark, copyright and right of publicity law), with an emphasis on litigation. Experience in trademark search/clearance, trademark prosecution, anti-counterfeiting and international trademark practice preferred.

Educational Background Required:

Juris Doctorate, bar admission.

You can apply by going to the the NBA website. Click on www.nba.com , click on employment opportunities at bottom right of page. Follow instructions for submitting job. Or you can email pmulvey@nba.com.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by Fugee
In that case, drop the athletes altogether and go with a wind musician. They've got agile lips and tongues that'll keep going for hours and amazing breath control.

Mrs. Hand heartily concurs...

(and if I ever catch the guy he's a dead man...)

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I think you need to insert "with NFH, [name of other poster with money obsession], [name of another person with money obession], [name of still another person with money obsession], [repeat as necessary] or [name of a person with money obsession]" between "get lucky" and "don't buy."

jesus christ stop twisting my words.

This whole thing started with who gets more action in a bar - rich guys or hot rocker dudes. Then it was, well how can you tell if a guy has money? I'm not saying that I would pick money guy over rocker dude for a 1 nighter, but if you're going to have a conversation beyond - dude how stoned did you get last night, you're (I'm) going to have a conversation with the guy that appears to have interests outside of the bong.

I'm not saying all guys with money have good taste or that all guys with good taste have money. Im just saying that guys who took the time to look good, go out and buy and nice pair of shoes probably cares more about other things.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
jesus christ stop twisting my words.

This whole thing started with who gets more action in a bar - rich guys or hot rocker dudes. Then it was, well how can you tell if a guy has money? I'm not saying that I would pick money guy over rocker dude for a 1 nighter, but if you're going to have a conversation beyond - dude how stoned did you get last night, you're (I'm) going to have a conversation with the guy that appears to have interests outside of the bong.

I'm not saying all guys with money have good taste or that all guys with good taste have money. Im just saying that guys who took the time to look good, go out and buy and nice pair of shoes probably cares more about other things.

Your grandpa likes a nice spike heel shoved up his ass just at climax.

Translation: Whatever. It wasn't really about you.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
jesus christ stop twisting my words.

This whole thing started with who gets more action in a bar - rich guys or hot rocker dudes. Then it was, well how can you tell if a guy has money? I'm not saying that I would pick money guy over rocker dude for a 1 nighter, but if you're going to have a conversation beyond - dude how stoned did you get last night, you're (I'm) going to have a conversation with the guy that appears to have interests outside of the bong.

I'm not saying all guys with money have good taste or that all guys with good taste have money. Im just saying that guys who took the time to look good, go out and buy and nice pair of shoes probably cares more about other things.

to tye it up, I have money, good taste and taste good.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by ironnutsedge

leagl, isn't the incorrect usage of "ironic" or its deratives a bannable offense? Please?

Asking me to ban people is a bannable offense.


And post the job on the job board, or on the IP board. If you post it there people will look at it. It will just get lost here.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
No doubt. But if you're going to look at it that way, lacrosse players will probably check you with their stick, soccer players will spend their time using nothing but their feet and basketball players will waste your time dribbling before dunking it into the hole. Maybe they should stick to swimmers who are all about the breast stroke and lapping.

TM

I dated lacrosse players.
I dated soccer players.
I dated basketball players and baseball players and pool players and rugby players (you caught me, NotBob!).
I married a swimmer.

TM is right.

[bold_n_brazen]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
You sure he was a lax player and not just a drunken idiot who hung out with lax players?

I was there when his team won a NCAA championship.

I was there when he played his first and last game in the American Lacrosse League (now defunct).

I was there when he played his first MILL game.

But now, many years later, he is finally just a drunken idiot who hangs out with lacrosse players.

[Skeks in the city]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower

I was drunk, but not on alcohol.

Course, not. You're always high on strife, jacking the socks, jocking the trolls.

[Skeks in the city]

Originally posted by Not Me

You fail to understand my needs.

All you need is attention.

[Dave]

I'm looking forward to Santa Claus, the Lawyer's Perspective:

Santa Claus: An Engineers Perspective

I. There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau).
At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.

II. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

III. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--- Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

IV. 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance --- this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake.

The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accellerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

[str8outavannuys]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Just because I do not find you attractive does not mean that I am gay. Carry on.

We should probably cut this out, though it's not as if (a) anyone else is posting or (b) much of interest has been posted today.

That's because I was busy. Sorry, won't let it happen again.

[Gattigap]

FBers:

Prepping for PenskeFest 2004? Primping for the next FBdrunkenbashhookup in Vegas/DC/NY/SF/LA/Hou/MN/Chi/Bos/Sea and want to make a good online impression? Postulating the merits of dusting off that Match.com bio and diving back in to the online dating scene? Pining for a photo that captures those Ferragamos and that Piaget in the frame? Or, have you realized that your FB avatar could really just use a good backlighting?

Your problems are solved. In the latest evolution of niche marketing, the aptly named LookBetterOnline.com can make your lizard's/dinosaur's scales shinier, remove Sidd's foot odor, and brush the kinks out of cathair like noone's business. And, I'm sure, for an extra $50 they'll agree to remove the "Olan Mills" watermark.

[Dave]

Originally posted by bold_n_brazen

a drunken idiot who hangs out with lacrosse players.

Something all FB'ers can relate to.