Fashion Board 6-9-04 to 7-13-04

[Sparklehorse]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
I'm getting closer. The winner of the 290 million-billion-dollars will accept a ceremonial check tomorrow at Mass Lottery HQ. Rumor has it that the lucky guy is a firefighter from Lowell. Hmmmm, wonder if he's single, I've always had a thing for firefighters. They have such nice asses.

Obligatory link

Anne, do you still want the winner now that we know it's a 68 year old housecleaner/grandmother? Her neighbor says she's a "bundle of energy."

But you got the Lowell part right.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
Pornstars have these too, as a target.

I associate those with porn actresses, but they seem to be becoming widely popular.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
I've never seen the small of a judge's back, but if I were to, I might want to start with the superhotties of the federal judiciary.
(spree: safe, but tempting like a big donut)

Damn. If those women are "hot" then I am downright smokin.

eta David Bowie doing fine after his heart surgery. I am sad to know that he is a senior citizen. 57 years old.
well, not surgery - angioplasty

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
David Bowie doing fine after his heart surgery. I am sad to now that he is a senior citizen. 57 years old.

I thought senior citizen referred to the 65 and over set, at least before AARP started obtaining direct mail information from the College Board.

And, uh, would you prefer to know that he was dead?

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Sparklehorse
Anne, do you still want the winner now that we know it's a 68 year old housecleaner/grandmother? Her neighbor says she's a "bundle of energy."

But you got the Lowell part right.

When will one of these winners have the balls to request that instead of one large novelty check, that they get three:
one to them for half the amount
one to the IRS for 45% of the amount
one to the state for the remaining amount.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
I thought senior citizen referred to the 65 and over set, at least before AARP started obtaining direct mail information from the College Board.

And, uh, would you prefer to know that he was dead?

I was told by someone whose sister was extremely bummed out about it that AARP sends out the senior cards (so that you can get your senior discount) at age 50. Another guy I worked with used this senior citizen card to work the senior discounts to everywhere even though he didn't really need it - he just really liked doing it.
So at 50, you're a senior. I think you're referring to mandatory retirement which happens way after your senior years have begun. Hopefully I can find me lotto winner way before then.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
I was told by someone whose sister was extremely bummed out about it that AARP sends out the senior cards (so that you can get your senior discount) at age 50. Another guy I worked with used this senior citizen card to work the senior discounts to everywhere even though he didn't really need it - he just really liked doing it.
So at 50, you're a senior. I think you're referring to mandatory retirement which happens way after your senior years have begun. Hopefully I can find me lotto winner way before then.

Okay. Understood. Your senior years begin at 50 because a lobbying group says so. You must be the most marketing-influenced adult professional I have never met.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
When will one of these winners have the balls to request that instead of one large novelty check, that they get three:
one to them for half the amount
one to the IRS for 45% of the amount
one to the state for the remaining amount.

Thank god Bush and the R congress finally raised the highest marginal rate.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Okay. Understood. Your senior years begin at 50 because a lobbying group says so. You must be the most marketing-influenced adult professional I have never met.

Are you saying that you actually believe that you're NOT a senior until you reach mandatory retirement age?
Or are you afraid that you're getting dangerously close to the lobbying group's definition and you're trying to hold off the "title."

[Sparklehorse]

Yesterday, I had a raging headache and went to sleep fairly early. At around midnight, I woke up to a shuffling sound near my closet. I have a cat who is fascinated by my other closet (and its high shelf filled with sweaters) but he usually sleeps in the living room and I'd closed the door to my bedroom so he wouldn't wake me up. So in my half-asleep state, I turned on the light, ready to scold the cat and kick him out of the room. Instead of a Siamese cat mask, I was looking at a raccoon mask. I got up and went out to the living room, closing the bedroom door, to check where the cat was. He was hanging out in the living room so I closed the door to the living room and returned to my bedroom. The raccoon was still in the same spot and then it opened its mouth like a cat hissing a warning would, although no noise came out. I stood there, trying to wake up from my stupor and formulate a plan get the damned animal out so I could go back to sleep. As I stood there, it scaled up the closet door frame and went back through the clothes racks and up to the hole in ceiling that apparently leads into the attic space. (The closet is a strange design, sloped back wall with a flat area up high (ceiling of staircase) where I've got some boxes stored.)

My mother just paid hundreds of dollars to have some baby raccoons removed from her chimney. After some agonizing about the situation, she'd called someone to remove them and asked the guy not to kill them. Since then, we found out this was technically illegal to live release the raccoons because of the risk of rabies.

So my question is: What should I do? Do I have to call my landlord and get him to hire Mister Rueysbroeck to come kill the raccoon or can I live in Lala Land and hope it will not come back downstairs? (Usually, unlike last night, I keep the closet door closed but it's where most of my clothes are.) Or should I try to block the hole in the ceiling?

[SlaveNoMore]

ltl/fb
I associate those with porn actresses, but they seem to be becoming widely popular.

Oh please. Half the girls on the FB have small-of-the-back tattoos.

And this place ain't exactly avant-garde.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
Half the girls on the FB have small-of-the-back tattoos.

I defer to your superior knowledge on this one.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Are you saying that you actually believe that you're NOT a senior until you reach mandatory retirement age?
Or are you afraid that you're getting dangerously close to the lobbying group's definition and you're trying to hold off the "title."

Your logical processes are impressive. And you weally huwt my feewings with that age crack. Sniff.

What I'm saying is that I don't think AARP's "definition" is or should be the determination. It's just a fucking euphemism, anyway. But it used to be that people thought of 65 as "senior" until AARP pushed it earlier and earlier to increase its membership, which benefits it not least because it is a lobbying group, dimwit.

And yes, people have traditionally thought of the retirement years, and not what are probably the highest-earning years of their careers, as their senior years. To say one is senior at 50 when one can expect to live to 80 or beyond in reasonably good health seems a little ridiculous (as does getting depressed about receiving a card from AARP, which, by the way, stands for stands for American Association of Retired Persons).

And, by the by, 65 does not necessarily represent mandatory retirement age, it was also the age at which one could collect full social security benefits, such as they are, but that has been pushed to 67.

You are really fucking stupid. And you will still be so when you are old like me.

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by Sparklehorse
So my question is: What should I do? Do I have to call my landlord and get him to hire Mister Rueysbroeck to come kill the raccoon or can I live in Lala Land and hope it will not come back downstairs? (Usually, unlike last night, I keep the closet door closed but it's where most of my clothes are.) Or should I try to block the hole in the ceiling?

Are you serious? I have a feeling this is BS.

In the event it's not, you definitely need to get them out of there. Racoons can cause serious damage to your house. Plus, they shit and piss and bring their food into the house and it's going to start smelling pretty quick. Plus, now that it has braved your house, you can bet it will do it again. It's only going to get worse.

[NotFromHere]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
old person ranting

Yeah. I thought it would be kind of fun to play today, but I've changed my mind. You've sucked all the fun out of friday.

And why do even give a fuck what is or isn't considered senior?