New Fashion Board 10-3-2003 - 11-7-2003 - Page 314

evenodds · 10-29-2003, 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
A friend and his wife tried to get me and the Mrs. to see puppetry of the Penis recently. I was going to go, then thought "Why the fuck am I spening money and getting dressed to go see a couple of rubes do something idiotic we used to do in the lockeroom in high school?"

To me, this all sounded incredibly painful and exotic. The OM informs me that half a dozen guys on his old fire crew could do the same.

Even(godspeed SoCal crews)Odds

Penske_Account · 10-29-2003, 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
"Cabbage" is pulling the scrotum up over the penis from underneath.

"Flying squirrel" is stretching the scrotum out on both sides to give the appearance of an outstretched flying squirrel's wings.

I don't know any others, except, of course, the "tape and tuck", which everybody knows. Ask Coltrane for a breakdown of some of the more exotic tricks.

A friend and his wife tried to get me and the Mrs. to see puppetry of the Penis recently. I was going to go, then thought "Why the fuck am I spening money and getting dressed to go see a couple of rubes do something idiotic we used to do in the lockeroom in high school?" Now if they had something called "Visions of the Vagina", I think I'd probably have gone...

I have nothing against full frontal male nudity, with my love of porn (classy porn) as exhibit A, but this show sounds like one of the most stupid things I have ever heard of. I'd rather spend two hours reading posts from Bil MO' than see this crappola.

No offence.

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 10-29-2003, 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Penske_Account
I have nothing against full frontal male nudity, with my love of porn (classy porn) as exhibit A, but this show sounds like one of the most stupid things I have ever heard of. I'd rather spend two hours reading posts from Bil MO' than see this crappola.

Speaking of Bilmore, this seems like the kind of show that is best suited to the freak show at some state fair. Deep-fried twinkie indeed.

Penske_Account · 10-29-2003, 10:35 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by evenodds
He can have all the blow jobs he wants any old time.

Unlimited variety of cake, on the other hand, is a special treat.

A. Its not unlimited, I doubt that's possible. His stomach would rupture or he'd vomit. Neither of which is a pleasant birthday scenario.

B. Why not bring in a variety of (mini)-hookers and he can have an (un)limited variety of blowjobs.

Just a thought.

And booze, remember nothing goes better with hookers than booze.

leagleaze · 10-29-2003, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by evenodds
Responding to a discussion on stupid penis tricks

Maybe it has been too long since I was up close and personal with a penis, but I cannot even picture how the hell you would do this.

sebastian_dangerfield · 10-29-2003, 10:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by evenodds
To me, this all sounded incredibly painful and exotic. The OM informs me that half a dozen guys on his old fire crew could do the same.

Even(godspeed SoCal crews)Odds

Cabbage and the flying squirrel are painless and easy. Some of the other tricks I've heard of include tying one's cock in a knot. That would hurt, particularly if one was to get even mildly aroused while tied up. That'd fucking kill...

I wonder if any of the tricks require erections? Coltrane?

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 10-29-2003, 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by evenodds
The OM informs me that half a dozen guys on his old fire crew could do the same.

And it worries you not at all that he and these others sat around the fire house (or wherever), yanked out their schlongs and started showing the cabbage and flying squirrel to each other. NTTAWWT, but there is something wrong with that.

Penske_Account · 10-29-2003, 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Speaking of Bilmore, this seems like the kind of show that is best suited to the freak show at some state fair. Deep-fried twinkie indeed.

I said "Bil Mo'" not Bilmore. Bil Mo is a freakish serial socker. Bilmore is my Minnesota sock. A distinct difference.

I have never eaten a deep fried twinkie but I imagine even a deep fried cat turd would be better than this show. And for $25K tax freeI'm willng to undertake the research to prove that. On videotape. for future webcast.

sebastian_dangerfield · 10-29-2003, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by leagleaze
Maybe it has been too long since I was up close and personal with a penis, but I cannot even picture how the hell you would do this.

Hey Leagl,

This just occured to me... why were you complaining about the unfair amount of female vs. male nudity in cinema yesterday? Seems you'd have little to complain about there...

S(just popped into my head)D

Penske_Account · 10-29-2003, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
And it worries you not at all that he and these others sat around the fire house (or wherever), yanked out their schlongs and started showing the cabbage and flying squirrel to each other. NTTAWWT, but there is something wrong with that.

Concur. Not that I engaged in such behavior, well at least not outside the rectory, but it sounds like not abnormal behavior for a junior high locker room. A firehouse....maybe...on Fire Island. NTTAWWT.

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-29-2003, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Atticus Grinch
All too prescient headline: Some Americanized British Shows Nosedive.

At least "The Office U.S." will have the same comfort Medea's children had: to be killed by their own maker.

Isn't the actor who plays Gervais one of the producers and perhaps even a writer? I would think that if he had a hand in the American version that he would be able to pick an actor to fill his shoes as best as anyone can. And who better to duplicate the feel of the show?

That said, it still ain't gonna work.

TM

[Edited to add that I should have read the article in your post first]

sebastian_dangerfield · 10-29-2003, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
And it worries you not at all that he and these others sat around the fire house (or wherever), yanked out their schlongs and started showing the cabbage and flying squirrel to each other. NTTAWWT, but there is something wrong with that.

Dude, it ain't fucking bukkake she's talking about, or the legendary "jerk off on the pizza" game. Dick tricks have been around for ages. I recall seeing this shit as early as 8th grade. I knew one cat in college with a huge package who would swing his dick and knock over 1.75 liter liqour bottles with it as a trick (dude was pcking a firehose in his pants). I'm shocked you haven't seen it.

Penske_Account · 10-29-2003, 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dick tricks have been around for ages. I recall seeing this shit as early as 8th grade.

You were an altar boy too?

Penske(Bukkake bores me!) Account

ThurgreedMarshall · 10-29-2003, 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Are you advocating that I take voyeur shots of my wife if she objects to having her tits on the net?

That's the whole fucking point of this entire conversation, isn't it?

TM

Mmmm, Burger (C.J.) · 10-29-2003, 10:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Dick tricks have been around for ages. I recall seeing this shit as early as 8th grade.

And you and the other associates at your law firm still do this?

I was kind of assuming that when E/O said fire crew she meant "adults with a real job" not 10-year-olds who are playing fire crew today and cops and robbers tomorrow.

[ETA:] And just as I'm not someone who would PPV your dick show for $1m, I've never felt deprived that my frat brothers kept their sausages in the casing, rather than knocking over beer bottles.