Fashion Board 6-9-04 to 7-13-04

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
You should stop reading negative book reviews. I realize they have theoretical value in helping one decide how to allocate one's valuable time, but most book critics, like most people, don't know what the fuck they're talking about* and just like to ruin things for everyone else. They're like the crone in my neighborhood who calls animal control whenever anyone lets their dog off leash in the park across the street from my house. So sad that she can't even bear to see dogs experiencing joy.

When the damn dog's only "joy" derives from digging up the tulips I spent 12 hours over a weekend planting, and I complain to you and you call me "spinster crone bitch" and kick the bulbs I'm gathering up out from under my hand, you are goddamned right I'm going to call animal control.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Not Bob
Which leads me to a poll that I was planning to do tomorrow, a poll borrowed from a game played by English professors in the books of David Lodge. What "great book" have you not read that you should have read, or which you pretended to have read, or which people think that you have read?

I'm going to win this one. I've never read Hamlet. My middle school assumed I'd read it in high school, my high school assumed I'd covered it in middle school, and I never took an english lit or Shakespeare class in college. On top of never having seen Hamlet, I've never seen it performed on stage or in the movies. This is deliberate, as I think I should read it before I see it. But for whatever reason, I never get around to reading it.

I don't think I've faked having read Hamlet, but I think people generally assume that Hamlet is something that was read at some point along a 20 plus year education.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
you call me "spinster crone bitch"

Liar! You know quite well that even in anger, I would avoid the tautology.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
When the damn dog's only "joy" derives from digging up the tulips I spent 12 hours over a weekend planting, and I complain to you and you call me "spinster crone bitch" and kick the bulbs I'm gathering up out from under my hand, you are goddamned right I'm going to call animal control.

Why on earth are you planting tulips in the middle of the summer?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Liar! You know quite well that even in anger, I would avoid the tautology.

You switch between them. I forgot to include the slashes.

And, for RT, I have never read Hamlet. In fact, I think I've only ever read one fairly obscure Shakespeare play all the way through (one of the historical ones, and not Henry V (or whichever one had Kenneth Branagh in it)). Go figure. I don't think middle school assumed I'd read it in high school, or high school assumed I'd already read it in middle school. I just went to crappy schools, I guess.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
Why on earth are you planting tulips in the middle of the summer?

It happened this spring. Silly.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

From CNN:

"ATLANTA, Georgia (AP) -- T-Boz of the female R&B group TLC has filed for divorce from her husband, rapper Mack 10, saying he committed adultery and threatened to kill her."

And here's the photo CNN is using for the story:



Are you fucking kidding me? That's the only photo they could find? Jesus. That's worse than darkening the skin on OJ's mug shot for your cover.

I won't argue if someone wants to say Mack 10 is a talentless fool, but this is ridiculous.



His side (and the necessary link):

"Mack 10, whose real name is Dedrick D-Mon Rolison, denied the allegations in court documents filed Friday. In them, he said his wife has made the claims "for the sole purpose of attempting to gain an advantage in these proceedings" and to prevent him from seeing their daughter."

http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Musi....ap/index.html

TM

[LessinSF]

http://www.9news.com/acm_news.aspx?O...7-c589c01ca7bf - according to testimony by medieval scholar/Colorado dean, "cunt" can be term of endearment. Well, duh.

Oh, and Dean, like you, I'm sure the football player meant it in the Chaucerian sense.

[notcasesensitive]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
You switch between them. I forgot to include the slashes.

And, for RT, I have never read Hamlet. In fact, I think I've only ever read one fairly obscure Shakespeare play all the way through (one of the historical ones, and not Henry V (or whichever one had Kenneth Branagh in it)). Go figure. I don't think middle school assumed I'd read it in high school, or high school assumed I'd already read it in middle school. I just went to crappy schools, I guess.

Similarly, I've read The Merchant of Venice at least twice for school assignments and the only other Shakespeare I've ever read is Romeo and Juliet. Not sure why my schools were so big on The Merchant of Venice, but they got their fucking pound of flesh from me.

[Tyrone Slothrop]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
You should stop reading negative book reviews. I realize they have theoretical value in helping one decide how to allocate one's valuable time, but most book critics, like most people, don't know what the fuck they're talking about and just like to ruin things for everyone else.

I almost never read reviews of fiction, mostly for the reasons you describe. If I'm going to read the book, I'd rather read the review after, and if I'm not going to read the book, what's the point? But reviews of non-fiction are different -- I'm probably never going to read the book -- life is too short -- but I can get something out of the review anyway.

If you're kinda interested in that book, check out the book reviews in The Atlantic by Caitlin Flanagan. E.g., this one about marriage and sex (or the lack thereof) or this one about Dr. Laura. I've posted about her stuff before. I don't always agree with her, but she's worth a look.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Bill Laimbeer wore one.

TM

for you Laimbeer haters out there you'll be happy to know he is a cow. I was standing next to him in a valet line a few months back, he has higher body fat than fringe after one of her "fall off the wagon" weekends.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I've never read Hamlet.

So having to read 1984 and animal Farm I'm sure lots of people think Orwell one-dimensional. Pick up Down and Out in Paris and London which is, I think, a non-fictional account of being dead broke in both. Another guy who was recommended to me years agothat I've only started reading is John Fante. Wait Until Spring Bandini and Ask the Dust are just very solid, and fun early examples of the realistic style of writing about the ugly in life that later became Bukowski. and shit Ty, you could read Post Office in a weekend, even with your drinking problem.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
for you Laimbeer haters out there you'll be happy to know he is a cow. I was standing next to him in a valet line a few months back, he has higher body fat than fringe after one of her "fall off the wagon" weekends.

Why are you obsessed with me?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
How old is your daughter?

43. she was born while i was in high School. why are you obsessed with me?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
43. she was born while i was in high School. why are you pbsessed with me?

Your afro is hot. If only your avatar would tie a bandana across its face.