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Old 05-19-2003, 02:09 PM   #6406
leagleaze
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Ok, so I met this couple this weekend. One person I had met before, the other was knew to me. We'll call them person A and person B.

Person B has two kids, under the age of 14. They seem a nice couple, and are talking about how person A has put her house on the market, and they have just put in an offer on a new house.

Person A will be moving to Person B's town, since they don't want to take the kids out of the school they are used to.

So hearing all this I figure, ok these folks have been together a while, right?

We are outside chatting after dinner, and I ask them how long they have been together.

March, they inform me.

MARCH? Ok, maybe I am crazy but I don't think that you can even begin to know if a relationship will work 2 months into it. You haven't even had a chance for the lust to wear off.

I am also thinking, you want to take a chance like this with your own lives, go for it, but with two young kids?

Personally, I cannot imagine even considering moving in with someone until at least a year has passed. Oh sure we might discuss it a bit about the 6 month mark or so, but to actually move in?

If I had kids, I would be very very hesitant about moving them in with someone else.

What do you folks think? How soon is too soon, with or without kids?
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:15 PM   #6407
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The Bachelor

Quote:
Originally posted by Paigow
I read the recap on ABC and apparentlyu Mister ANdrew cut a check for over 48 grand for this ring without batting an eye.
I was under the impression that ABC paid for all the rings )except for the second guy who insisted on paying for it himself?
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:21 PM   #6408
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The Bachelor

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Originally posted by NotFromHere
I was under the impression that ABC paid for all the rings )except for the second guy who insisted on paying for it himself?
Well, it just said he wrote the check. I assume that he is writing from his own checking account. not clear whether abc is gonna reimburse but I dont recall Alex cutting his own check. After Aaron made the big move of buying the ring himslf, Andew would just look like a cheap bastard if he didnt pay for his own ring.

as for leagl's question- i think it is totally subjective and that a rule cant be placed on these things. but you probably should have a lot in common in terms of where you have been and where you want to go. A friend of mine once said that you never really know someone until four months have oassed- I think there is some truth to this in my experience. but it isnt like an overnight thing where at 3 months and twentyeight days you dont know the other and then, schwump, you do.
 
Old 05-19-2003, 02:25 PM   #6409
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Quote:
Originally posted by leagleaze
What do you folks think? How soon is too soon, with or without kids?
Too soon for moving in with each other? Without kids, I'd say about a year. With kids, much longer. Like, two or three years.

In fact, call me old-fashioned, but if I were single with kids, I would not have someone move in with me unless marriage was imminent.

Which is strange because I've always felt that having the gov't and a religion put a stamp of approval on your relationship is bullshit. I've never had a problem with couples who were a "couple" but weren't married. Same goes for couples having kids without being married. I couldn't care less.

But in this case we're talking about my kids. So before I force them to live with some other adult, I'm going to make sure I'm fully committed to said other adult. If I were so fully committed (pun intended), I would probably want to get married.
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:26 PM   #6410
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Quote:
Originally posted by leagleaze
Ok, so I met this couple this weekend. One person I had met before, the other was knew to me. We'll call them person A and person B.

Person B has two kids, under the age of 14. They seem a nice couple, and are talking about how person A has put her house on the market, and they have just put in an offer on a new house.

Person A will be moving to Person B's town, since they don't want to take the kids out of the school they are used to.

So hearing all this I figure, ok these folks have been together a while, right?

We are outside chatting after dinner, and I ask them how long they have been together.

March, they inform me.

MARCH? Ok, maybe I am crazy but I don't think that you can even begin to know if a relationship will work 2 months into it. You haven't even had a chance for the lust to wear off.

I am also thinking, you want to take a chance like this with your own lives, go for it, but with two young kids?

Personally, I cannot imagine even considering moving in with someone until at least a year has passed. Oh sure we might discuss it a bit about the 6 month mark or so, but to actually move in?

If I had kids, I would be very very hesitant about moving them in with someone else.

What do you folks think? How soon is too soon, with or without kids?
This is a train wreck waiting to happen especially when there are children involved. Wait at least six months before moving in together so that the relationship can be evaluated realistically instead of through rose tinted glasses.

It will be interesting when Person A attempts to discipline Person B's children or vice versa.
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:29 PM   #6411
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"breaking news" from the Firestone vineyard website

My favorite paragraph

"As most of you know, this family is anything but conventional, and so the eccentricity of this approach did engender some appeal. If our parents could meet at the stage door of a ballet theatre, then why not on a television studio? In Andrew’s case, it seemed entirely appropriate. He concluded that life would be all the spicier for having attempted this thing and especially dull if he had overlooked it. Filming is complete and now the process is in the hands of television marketers. Andrew reports that the ladies he met were simply amazing, ending any reservations he had held."
 
Old 05-19-2003, 02:34 PM   #6412
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Quote:
Originally posted by leagleaze
Ok, so I met this couple this weekend. One person I had met before, the other was knew to me. We'll call them person A and person B.

Person B has two kids, under the age of 14. They seem a nice couple, and are talking about how person A has put her house on the market, and they have just put in an offer on a new house.

Person A will be moving to Person B's town, since they don't want to take the kids out of the school they are used to.

So hearing all this I figure, ok these folks have been together a while, right?

We are outside chatting after dinner, and I ask them how long they have been together.

March, they inform me.

MARCH? Ok, maybe I am crazy but I don't think that you can even begin to know if a relationship will work 2 months into it. You haven't even had a chance for the lust to wear off.

I am also thinking, you want to take a chance like this with your own lives, go for it, but with two young kids?

Personally, I cannot imagine even considering moving in with someone until at least a year has passed. Oh sure we might discuss it a bit about the 6 month mark or so, but to actually move in?

If I had kids, I would be very very hesitant about moving them in with someone else.

What do you folks think? How soon is too soon, with or without kids?
March ?! Two months?! Poor kids.

With no kids, I'd say a year is about right. The lust needs to wear off, holidays and family dynamics need to be expericenced, families met, and vacations taken.

With kids, double or triple that. It also depends on the kids themselves, their age, and whether or not there is another parent in the picture.

Personally I'm rather old-fashioned. I want some kind of symbol or ceremony before I live with someone in the biblical sense. Too often I've known people who moved in together for convenience and the relationship has never lasted.
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:40 PM   #6413
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Lush Life

Quote:
Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
I have no respect for people with virtually infinite trust funds who still work. They're missing the point. I want a trust fund SO I CAN SIT ON MY ASS...
On Friday, after a particularly tough week, I consoled myself on the drive home by redrafting my Lottery Winner Press Conference Speech. This is the speech I will give to the press upon winning >$35MM in the California lottery. I redraft it about once a year.

Atticus: I suppose you're wondering why I've called you all here. [Wait for laughter.] I am pleased to announce my candidacy for the Republican Party's nomination to the United States Senate for the great state of California. [Wait for nervous laughter.] It is every self-made millionaire's duty to run for the GOP nomination; we call it the White Man's Burden. [Wait for roar of laughter.] I would be pleased to answer any questions you have for me, excepting my home address and telephone number.

AP reporter: I'm with the AP. What are you going to do with all of that fucking money?

Atticus: There are a couple of charitable causes I'd like to address first. For example, I am proud to finally be able to assist the worldwide cause of ferret legalization. I will not rest until we have enslaved every living ferret under the dominion of a fat and creepy human overlord.

BBC reporter: I'm extremely turned on by you right now, but duty compels me to ask: are you going to continue to work?

Atticus: God has blessed me with freedom from toil. It would be a slap in the face to reject that gift. However, my keen sense of noblesse oblige directs me to teach in inner city schools. Sure, it will be a lot of hard work on behalf of my fellow man. There is a long and honorable history of the rich undertaking society's most thankless tasks. Fortunately, I'll be able to get to and from work in a really fucking sweet car. I urge any inner city school with secured, covered parking to contact me to discuss terms. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a date to bang a model on a pile of cash.
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:41 PM   #6414
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Quote:
Originally posted by paigowprincess
Wouldnt old money types be appaled by this sort of publicity whoring? Thats why I think they have to be thinking about selling Firestone wines.
Some people are just fame whores. They all seemed to enjoy themselves on camera.

What I find baffling is the assumption that because people are wealthy, even wealthy for generations, they somehow have class.

Some of the tackiest people I have known are from incredibly wealthy, old-money families (several of whom have founded prominent colleges).

I was involved in a palm beach wedding several years ago that, though elegant, rivaled the tackiest bride and bridal family behavior I have ever seen. The bad behavior was so horrendous that family and friend relationships were fractured forever.

So, why should we be surprised that the Firestones encouraged their youngest boy to whore himself on tv as a lark?
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:49 PM   #6415
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Quote:
leagleaze
Ok, so I met this couple this weekend. One person I had met before, the other was knew to me. We'll call them person A and person B.

Person B has two kids, under the age of 14. They seem a nice couple, and are talking about how person A has put her house on the market, and they have just put in an offer on a new house.
This an M-F couple or a F-F couple?

not7yS
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Old 05-19-2003, 02:49 PM   #6416
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Associate backstabbing

Because nobody read the press inquiries board, I strongly urge y'all to consider submissions to this request for stories about associate backstabbing.

Unfortunately, I can't think of any that take less than 45 minutes to explain. They also require hand motions, which don't translate well into e-mail.
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Old 05-19-2003, 03:00 PM   #6417
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Quote:
Originally posted by barely_legal
That wouldn't work b/c there'd be no way they could keep the identity of the final "lady" a secret for that long. And I doubt as many people would watch if they already knew who his final choice was. Nobody gives a damn whether these people actually stay together or not, they only want to see the "ladies" be bitchy to one another and melt down in the limo.
Don't they keep it a secret now? At least they could have a few weekends together.

Anyway, I'm guessing 95% would stay tuned for the second hour.

As for Firstone, isn't he like the "marketing" director for the winery? His older bro' is like the managing director or VP or something more important. Seems to me it's the perfect thing for the black sheep to do -- go on TV, get some pub. Unless the Jen fan club is a bunch of wine drinkers, when he dumps her no one will care, least of all the family business.
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Old 05-19-2003, 03:06 PM   #6418
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Quote:
Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Don't they keep it a secret now? At least they could have a few weekends together.

Anyway, I'm guessing 95% would stay tuned for the second hour.

As for Firstone, isn't he like the "marketing" director for the winery? His older bro' is like the managing director or VP or something more important. Seems to me it's the perfect thing for the black sheep to do -- go on TV, get some pub. Unless the Jen fan club is a bunch of wine drinkers, when he dumps her no one will care, least of all the family business.
They only have to keep it a secret now for a few months. and the couple only sees each other a few times during that time. If they did it your way, there's no way that they could keep it a secret if the couple were actually living near each other and going out and acting like a normal couple.

And I'm not saying people wouldn't watch the second half of the finale, I'm saying they wouldn't watch the entire series. It's boring when you already know who wins, which is why ABC goes to such lengths to plant false stories and keep the "winners" of the Bachelor/Bachelorette a secret.
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Old 05-19-2003, 03:12 PM   #6419
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The Bachelor

Quote:
Originally posted by barely_legal
They only have to keep it a secret now for a few months. and the couple only sees each other a few times during that time. If they did it your way, there's no way that they could keep it a secret if the couple were actually living near each other and going out and acting like a normal couple.
Well they date each other for 8 weeks during the shooting - what I don't get is why they wait so long to air the show. And what I'd really like to see is the finale live - like Survivor. Make the girls wait to see who really wins and then show it live.
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Old 05-19-2003, 03:13 PM   #6420
leagleaze
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Poll: How soon is too soon

Quote:
Originally posted by SlaveNoMore
This an M-F couple or a F-F couple?

not7yS
I was wondering when someone would ask that. In this case, it is two women. Does it matter though?

I note you didn't ask if it was M-M. How come? Just assumed two men wouldn't move in together that quickly or no particular reason?
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