Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Clear silicone earplugs. Work with shrieking kids too. If you have long enough hair to cover your ears, no one even notices. And if they do, all you'll get is a longing stare of envy from your seatmates.

P(headphones from a turned-off walkman just don't work as well)J

I usually go with the CD Player or MP3 on pretty loud, but even that doesn't cover some of the laughing fits they go on...

On the other hand, some of the dumbasses on the train provide good comedy. One late night not long ago on the last commuter train out, we got to almost the end of the line about 35 miles out of town when some half-drunk guy was surprised to learn from the conductor that he was not on the Amtrak to New York...

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Come down to the distric during rush hour. [primal scream commences]

I find this fascinating. I'm not saying that you don't have umbrella-wielding, walkway-congesting, fatty pedestrians in the District, but I will observe that the sidewalks (at least downtown) are wider and broader than a number of other big cities. I guess I understand the irritation, but not the obsession.

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I nearly plowed down a shorty who had wandered about ten feet from his obese mother on my way into my office building. I am pretty sure they didnt work in the building so get the fuck away.

You never know. She could've been bringing shorty in to parade em around the office today.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Originally posted by leagleaze


You are in need of some serious help. That's twisted.

Awww, thanks!

I'm guessing that went right over your head huh?

[Connect_the_Dots]

Originally posted by soup sandwich
You're not required to hold anyone's kid, or even stop working.

Here's what I say:

"Hey, look at this big guy/sweetie. How's he/she sleeping so far?"

Wait for answer.

"Well at least you're getting a little time to rest. Good luck."

Done. 20 seconds expired.

Do you think you have to hold the kid because you're female? No one ever cares when I decline to hold a baby.

Fucking amateur! I just start caughing loudly when I am walking down the hall--new mothers treat people with a cold like SARS patients.

[LessinSF]

Originally posted by TexLex
I am glad you don't openly advocate killing children or anythng, but still...

We should be eating them instead, especially the deficient ones.

Less' unoriginal, yet still modest, proposal.

Originally posted by LessinSF
We should be eating them instead, especially the deficient ones.

I suppose that would have nipped the whole fat-secretary-hogging-the-sidewalk problem in the bud by weeding them out early.

-TL

[str8outavannuys]

So I'm getting married in a few months. I emailed my family members and friends with young kids to alert them to our "no children/babies at the ceremony or reception" policy. Here's what a cousin (one 3 y/o, and 7 months pregnant with another) wrote back:

"I think your plan sounds great! No objections from this mom. Sasha will have a wonderful time playing with other kids and it takes the stress away from the parents to keep children quiet all the time. If we make it — and it's our intention to come, but new baby will be only two months old which is why I say "if" — then the baby will need to be with me, but I don't anticipate this being a problem. He/she will probably sleep most of the time and will be quiet while nursing. I'll carry him/her outside if there's any crying. I hope this is okay with both of you."

POLL:
Is this response an example of:
a) passive/aggressiveness
b) rudeness
c) stupidity
or d) other?

str8

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Rant about slow walkers.

You know, I was about to exhibit sympathy for the slowpokes, when I realized that I was actively hating every single vehicle between me and my destination at lunch. They were either too big (dump truck, bus), stopped too frequently or for no apparent reason, went 2 miles an hour because it was clear they had no idea where they were going, didn't go through the lights fast enough, presumed to get in front of me and THEN slowed down, etc. I live in a city of vehicles and walking anywhere is unnatural to us. Hell, our artists use their cars as their canvasses. So I don't have to deal with the slow and inept walkers as much as the more densely populated cities. But I do sympathize.

And no one should be allowed to drive but me.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Yes. That, and the baby inevitably mistakes my substantial rack for a snack bar.

Heh, me too. I've had mothers glare at me when they realized that their kid was wondering why he didn't get the supersized happy meal.

[ThrashersFan]

Originally posted by TexLex

Don't take it personally - it's not like I said you were as crabby as TM or anything.

Well, that would be utterly fucking impossible anyway.

I guess it just goes to show that much is lost in e-mails and the like. I do not intend to sound negative in, well, the negative sense. I suppose the fact that I generally feel inclined to post only when I feel strongly about something (or have something witty to say -- although I seem to be the only one who finds me witty) and thus must come off rather strong which some interpret as being negative. Would it help erase my negative image if I told you that I successfully refrained from pinching the baby?

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
So I'm getting married in a few months. I emailed my family members and friends with young kids to alert them to our "no children/babies at the ceremony or reception" policy. Here's what a cousin (one 3 y/o, and 7 months pregnant with another) wrote back:

"I think your plan sounds great! No objections from this mom. Sasha will have a wonderful time playing with other kids and it takes the stress away from the parents to keep children quiet all the time. If we make it — and it's our intention to come, but new baby will be only two months old which is why I say "if" — then the baby will need to be with me, but I don't anticipate this being a problem. He/she will probably sleep most of the time and will be quiet while nursing. I'll carry him/her outside if there's any crying. I hope this is okay with both of you."

POLL:
Is this response an example of:
a) passive/aggressiveness
b) rudeness
c) stupidity
or d) other?

str8

a, b, and c. Did you indicate you were hiring babysitters for all kids? (It might not be a bad idea, but you could tell folks they're on the hook for their own). As for the two-month old, I think you ought to write back saying, basically, "you must have misunderstood; we're not inviting children. If you need help locating a babysitter to take care of your baby during the reception/wedding, please let me know."

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by LessinSF
We should be eating them instead, especially the deficient ones. [emphasis added]

Less' unoriginal, yet still modest, proposal.

... and misguided, too.

Think of it this way. Assuming you decide to eat steak, why on earth would you choose the worst cuts?

[ThrashersFan]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
What? Are you overly sensitive? I didn't read any of those posts about dragging your screaming kid to the office and disrupting everyone else as crabby at all. It was merely a statement of fact.
Stated in a calm and rational manner by someone who is trying to get some work done.

It appears as if I finally have a friend. :kisscheek
Apparently someone who missed the entire vanillawhitebreadanalsex series.

I :love: NFH

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
So I'm getting married in a few months. I emailed my family members and friends with young kids to alert them to our "no children/babies at the ceremony or reception" policy. Here's what a cousin (one 3 y/o, and 7 months pregnant with another) wrote back:...
POLL:
Is this response an example of:
a) passive/aggressiveness
b) rudeness
c) stupidity
or d) other?

str8

A and B. You shouldn't've even had to send the email; the way the invite is addressed tells the recipient who in the family is invited. We actually had to stop inviting pals who insisted on bringing their kid to obviously adult-only venues like the opera or cocktail hours, since they refused to go anywhere without it (and they had a fucking NANNY!)

Also, your cousin is lying. The baby will howl throughout your entire ceremony and your cousin won't take it out because they won't want to miss your vows, which they've just wrecked.

FWIW, if your family won't stop bitching about it, get a separate room wherever the wedding is, hire a babysitter, and force the family kids to stay there during the wedding and, if you want, during the reception too (rent Disney movies).

P(Been there, pain-in-the-assed that)J

[ThrashersFan]

Originally posted by LessinSF
We should be eating them instead, especially the deficient ones.

Less' unoriginal, yet still modest, proposal.

I read your post and all of a sudden I thought about Eddie Izzard graphically describing putting babies on spears/posts and laughed so hard I thought I would piss my pants. Everyone here thinks I am crazy anyway so it did not even warrant a glance from people passing by my office at the time.