Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03 - Page 60

Alex_de_Large · 04-04-2003, 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by taxwonk
The saddest thing in my life at this time is that I am on heavy-duty painkillers (post-surgery) and I actually understood this.

Sorry to hear that you needed more surgery, wonk. Get better.

sebastian_dangerfield · 04-04-2003, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by JustForFun
Oh but if they saw me in person, they, like the others, would be quite aroused.

Sebby admits to being turned on when his high-school educated secretary says "Is this what you asked me to fax for you" if she says it with erect nipples. Sebby, afterall, is the man who is going to send his wife to be sliced, diced, and sucked out so that he will remain attracted enough to fuck her.

Yeah, it probably was your wit.

1. You are an admitted 40 plus woman* trawling a chat board for sexual self esteem. Yes, you get me rock hard.

2. I never mentioned my secretary once. Don't mix threads, Eunice.

3. As to the slicing and dicing, you present my statement that I'd pay for my wife to get plastic work done while omitting that I said that I too would have plastic surgery if I got fat. That omission is not error - you intentionally did so to intimate that I'm sexist. I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't force me to waste posts untwisting someone else's spin of my previous posts.

sebastian_dangerfield · 04-04-2003, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by JustForFun
Then you agree that the men find my not subtle "money shot" style of writing erotic, eh?

TITS!!! Perky C-cup TITS with rose-colored nipples, that is.

JFF,

If there was such a thing as the "Anti-DH Lawrence," it'd be you. You might be the most unerotic writer ever.

"Money shot" writing may be funny, perhaps amusing, maybe even titilating in a base sense, but it ain't sexy. Howard Stern is overtly sexual, but I don't think anyone gets turned on by his humor.

You have a real talent for turning sex discussions into clinical analyses - the language is dry and overly-descriptive. I feel like I'm reading "The Naked Ape" or some Natl Geographic piece on baboon copulation ("And then the female, with her flushed red vulva exposed, presents for the male...").

There's a difference between a naughty conversation about hard nipples poking through a co-worker's shirt and your "Then my husband became erect when he saw my rose colored nipples and tanned buttocks" shtick. The former is funny, and funny is sexy. The latter is creepy, and creepy ain't sexy.

You can't give someone sexuality... some folks just don't have it, despite their most vehement protests to the contrary. I've known many women who cooed about how great the were in the sack, and they all sucked. Its the ones who crack me up and want to have a good time who turn out to be the best.

I am turned on by the nipples, but its the head that "closes the deal."

S(we're not a simple as you think... we dig the wit)D

ThurgreedMarshall · 04-04-2003, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ltl/fb
It exaggerates.

It puts the clothes in the basket or it gets the hose.

TM

Alex_de_Large · 04-04-2003, 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
It puts the clothes in the basket or it gets the hose.

TM

Lotion, not clothes. It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.

04-04-2003, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ABBAKiss
It is paigow's location.

Yes, I have moved to Gaylord, MN. The burritos are better here. And the men are infinitely hotter.

04-04-2003, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Translation: This board isn't big enough for a second ego as large as mine.

We already have a Thurgreed. Who can actually pull the translation thing off in a funny way. Get your own schtick

evenodds · 04-04-2003, 11:11 AM

This article is the stupidest thing I have read this morning:

Denver Fans Walk Out of Pearl Jam Show

DENVER - Dozens of fans walked out of a Pearl Jam concert after lead singer Eddie Vedder (news) took a mask of President Bush (news - web sites) and impaled it on a microphone stand.

Several concertgoers booed and shouted Tuesday night for Vedder to shut up as he told the crowd he was against the war and Bush. He impaled the mask during the encore of the band's opening show of a U.S. tour.

"It was like he decapitated someone in a primal ritual and stuck their head on a stick," fan Keith Zimmerman said.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...oncert_walkout

04-04-2003, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by catrin_darcy
(a) what is a hitler stash? did i miss something in the extensive waxing/brazilian/chris discussions back in the day?

(b) for playboy "models" i assume playboy decides. you think those lovely ladies do their own makeup?

(c) apb: chicks talk. to one another. about stuff. now and again. plus they talk to their aestheticians . .. . .

cd

I have absolutely no idea who you are but was wondering if you are a boy or a girl.

sebastian_dangerfield · 04-04-2003, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by evenodds
This article is the stupidest thing I have read this morning:

Denver Fans Walk Out of Pearl Jam Show

DENVER - Dozens of fans walked out of a Pearl Jam concert after lead singer Eddie Vedder (news) took a mask of President Bush (news - web sites) and impaled it on a microphone stand.

Several concertgoers booed and shouted Tuesday night for Vedder to shut up as he told the crowd he was against the war and Bush. He impaled the mask during the encore of the band's opening show of a U.S. tour.

"It was like he decapitated someone in a primal ritual and stuck their head on a stick," fan Keith Zimmerman said.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmp...oncert_walkout

Asked for comment after the show, Vedder seemed perplexed, "I didn't think much of the mask thing... I just figured everyone left because we've been singing the same exact song for the last decade plus." One fan, Jennifer, 15, of Lower Coumbine, noted her displeasure at not hearing her favorite Pearl jam tunes, "I just wanted to hear 'Black'... that song's, like, so deep. It put me to sleep each night after my cat, Knuckles, was run over by a drunk kid on an ATV."

S(And for you, Jennifer, here's out long distance dedication...)D

04-04-2003, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
Slightly related is one of The Onion's Prom Planning Tips:

Prom night is one of the most memorable nights of your life, so don't ruin it by neglecting to wax. No guy wants to go down on a gorilla salad.

Gorilla Salad - I nearly fell out of my chair...

It is posts like these that quash any remote urge I ever have to expeirment with bisexuality. I do not know how you guys and some of your girls do it.

ThurgreedMarshall · 04-04-2003, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by coup_d'skek
TM already called it, paig's old flame, the irrepressible, the ineffable, patentgreedy

Can't take any credit for that. Barely_beagle told me PG was her guess and she is dead on.

TM

ms. naughty diplomat · 04-04-2003, 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Asked for comment after the show, Vedder seemed perplexed, "I didn't think much of the mask thing... I just figured everyone left because we've been singing the same exact song for the last decade plus." One fan, Jennifer, 15, of Lower Coumbine, noted her displeasure at not hearing her favorite Pearl jam tunes, "I just wanted to hear 'Black'... that song's, like, so deep. It put me to sleep each night after my cat, Knuckles, was run over by a drunk kid on an ATV."

S(And for you, Jennifer, here's out long distance dedication...)D

i can hear casey casem now: "we are now to long distance dedication time. this is from jennifer of lower coumbine colorado. dear casey, recently there was a death in my family - a little cat named knuckles. i realize that this might seem strange to you, but he really met a lot to my family and it would mean a lot if you would play . . . this is bullshit. i want someone here to use their fucking head around here and not come out of an upbeat record and talk about a fucking cat dying"

ms. naughty diplomat

sebastian_dangerfield · 04-04-2003, 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by paigowprincess
It is posts like these that quash any remote urge I ever have to expeirment with bisexuality. I do not know how you guys and some of your girls do it.

Is this some sort of admission that you are sporting an untamed jungle? Your avatar suggests a Hitler or viciously cropped landing strip, but you are a Crowes fan with hippy sensibilities.

I was an altar boy and a cub scout - munching is a hell of a lot easier than swallowing.

S(Is this a threshhold I needed to pass?)D

04-04-2003, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by coup_d'skek
GA2GP is way funny. Far funnier than you. You just don't happen to like him, probably cuz he shitstomped you one to many times.

Mister Revolving Not So Funny Moniker Guy:

I challenge you to find

1) one funny gattigap post
2) one gattigap post where he shitstomps me.

I would say that I have been "shitstomped" by Less and TM and thats probably it. THe other attempts were to weak and easily consumed by the raging flames I fired back. Most people cant handle my heat and when they try, they crash burn and disappear as most recently demonstrated by Adder and Durden.

Dont fuck with the paigow.