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Old 06-11-2003, 02:54 PM   #8986
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MR Norton

Quote:
Originally posted by ABBAKiss
Vaguely, if I squint my eyes. Sort of how if you look at a picture of Kate Hudson it looks like me vaguely, if you squint your eyes.* You have a far less demonic/creepy vibe to you than Ed does.

I don't have a problem with it exactly. I just really liked the Brad Pitt one better.
I think you can safely say that we ALL liked Brad Pitt better.
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Old 06-11-2003, 02:59 PM   #8987
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The Perfect Threesome

Because you people are boring me to no end today, I've come up with a poll that will entertain not just me, but everyone (hopefully).

When all conditions are just so and the planets are in alignment (and I have not only won the $95 MM lottery, but have become the biggest movie star in the world), much as the Perfect Storm formed, I will achieve the Perfect Threesome.

So, if you had to choose just two people (no alternates) to be in a threesome with you, who would they be? Please post photos. (I know this might just be a variance on the laminated list poll, but you never know -- someone like RP may pick Tyler).

Mine is no mystery. Me, Halle and Brooke Burke (of "Wild On" fame).

*

Thurgreed(*X = me)Marshall

Go here for more pictures of Burke (some nudie): http://www.babezone.org/gallery/broo...Burke_gal1.htm
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Old 06-11-2003, 02:59 PM   #8988
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Quote:
Originally posted by robustpuppy
I think I already posted the story about the time I shamed a tourist on the Metro into stopping that appalling behavior with a very well-executed dirty look.

It was a highlight of my commuting life.
That and those who lay their nappy heads against the window....leaving a pleasant smudge.

Did I just get a minor K ????
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:02 PM   #8989
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The Perfect Threesome

Quote:
Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
So, if you had to choose just two people (no alternates) to be in a threesome with you, who would they be? Please post photos. (I know this might just be a variance on the laminated list poll, but you never know -- someone like RP may pick Tyler).
I don't know how to post pictures, but i would choose Colin Farrell and Christina Aguilera. They are not the hottest of the hot, necessarily, but I get the feeling they would be up for anything.
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:04 PM   #8990
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The Perfect Threesome

Quote:
Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall


So, if you had to choose just two people (no alternates) to be in a threesome with you, who would they be? Please post photos. (I know this might just be a variance on the laminated list poll, but you never know -- someone like RP may pick Tyler).


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Old 06-11-2003, 03:05 PM   #8991
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Worst Passengers

Quote:
Originally posted by evenodds
I have sat next to the cuticle cutting, polish changing woman. I wanted to punch her.

I barely avoided the worst passenger ever -- a drunk guy who offered to switch seats with my boyfriend, who was sitting a row in front, so that we could sit together. He then spent the entire flight hitting on the woman next to him. Her husband, next to her, showed more self-restraint than I thought humanly possible because he didn't punch the guy repeatedly.

I was seated next to a Fox news correspondent on a long flight from DC to Texas. He explained his open relationship with his girlfriend ("she's your age, you know"), so I parried with "Tales of the OddMan." This was interesting enough to the reporter buried deep within him that he then interrogated me for three hours about the life of an interracial couple. At the end, he reminded me that he had an open relationship and that they routinely invited attractive women into their world.

I was so thrilled when the plane landed and the OM was there, sweating and menacing, straight from jui jitsu.
You win. No question about it.
The worst passenger of all time is the 2 year old kid who sits behind me on every flight, kicking the shit out of my chair and slamming the window shade up and down.

Last time that happened, said brat was sitting behind my companion. When I turned around and kindly asked the mom to do her best to please have her child stop kicking my companion's chair, she tried to give me the death stare, and said "He's TWO." I replied with "then you should have no problem controlling him." The rest of the flight, whenever the kid would bang around, mom would loudly say "Don't do that honey, the princess in front of you doesn't like that." Thankfully, said "princess" had her headphones on and didn't hear said rude comments, or else said mom wouldn't be saying anything ever again because her tongue would have been ripped out of her mouth and jammed in her own larynx.

str(she really doesn't like being called "princess")8
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:20 PM   #8992
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Worst Passengers

Quote:
Originally posted by str8outavannuys
You win. No question about it.
The worst passenger of all time is the 2 year old kid who sits behind me on every flight, kicking the shit out of my chair and slamming the window shade up and down.

Last time that happened, said brat was sitting behind my companion. When I turned around and kindly asked the mom to do her best to please have her child stop kicking my companion's chair, she tried to give me the death stare, and said "He's TWO." I replied with "then you should have no problem controlling him." The rest of the flight, whenever the kid would bang around, mom would loudly say "Don't do that honey, the princess in front of you doesn't like that." Thankfully, said "princess" had her headphones on and didn't hear said rude comments, or else said mom wouldn't be saying anything ever again because her tongue would have been ripped out of her mouth and jammed in her own larynx.

str(she really doesn't like being called "princess")8
Once. Just once I'd like to sit behind the mother/father of that child and reflexively kick his/her seat every time the child does the same. What's funny is, that kid sits behind me on every flight. He sure gets around.
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:23 PM   #8993
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Quote:
Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Story about rude airline customers and their offspring
I will add this to my reasons why I don't fly. Of course, it goes somewhere below "these things go down and those fuckers don't have the courtesy to give me a damn parachute so that I at least have a bit of a chance to survive (or at least can fool myself into believing that I do)." I hate every aspect of flying -- especially the other passengers. A lot of flights in this country take about an hour or two (or three) and I simply cannot understand how grown people cannot control themselves (and their offspring) for a few hours. From the time they get on the plane these people want everything but bitch about paying more than $99 for a seat. Anyone who cannot go a few hours without eating, wandering or taking a piss/shit (on an airplane? the horror) needs to do some soul searching. On these short flights an airplane is a way to get from A to B, not a fucking amusement park ride. People on planes (short flights) should sit down, shut up, read a book or something and leave everyone else the fuck alone.


When the passenger announced that her child was two, it would have been funny if you had said "are you trying to say that I know you from 2 years and nine months ago and insinuate something?"
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:26 PM   #8994
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Quote:
Originally posted by str8outavannuys
Last time that happened, said brat was sitting behind my companion. When I turned around and kindly asked the mom to do her best to please have her child stop kicking my companion's chair, she tried to give me the death stare, and said "He's TWO." I replied with "then you should have no problem controlling him." The rest of the flight, whenever the kid would bang around, mom would loudly say "Don't do that honey, the princess in front of you doesn't like that." Thankfully, said "princess" had her headphones on and didn't hear said rude comments, or else said mom wouldn't be saying anything ever again because her tongue would have been ripped out of her mouth and jammed in her own larynx.

str(she really doesn't like being called "princess")8
Parents: to you, your kids are the world, and you've read enough child development books to know what kind of annoying behavior to expect at what age. But to the rest of us, at their Munchkin mercy in a tiny silver mailing tube 25,000 feet in the sky with no escape, they're just a simple pain in the ass. So restrain them. Please. Or perhaps consider toting along a little parachute.

P(sigh)J
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:27 PM   #8995
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Quote:
Originally posted by MisterEbola
That and those who lay their nappy heads against the window....leaving a pleasant smudge.
You seem very fastidious for a guy who calls himself Mr. Ebola.

Speaking of icky viruses, I'm very flattered to be in your perfect threesome, but if it were to occur it would have to be before Abba does Colin and Christina and after you've provided proof that your moniker has no relation to your health status.
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:46 PM   #8996
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Quote:
Originally posted by ThrashersFan
Anyone who cannot go a few hours without eating, wandering or taking a piss/shit (on an airplane? the horror) needs to do some soul searching.
I was on a long-haul flight when a passenger took what must have been the mother of all dumps. He stunk up the plane so badly that passengers many rows away were gagging. Being the caffeine addict that I am, I went back to the gallery for a refill and the poor flight attendant informed me that they had tried everything to dissipate the smell, even using that well-known remedy of pouring bottles of beer down the toilet and flushing. Needless to say that particular bathroom was out of commission for the remainder of the flight.:die:
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:54 PM   #8997
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Quote:
Originally posted by evenodds
At the end, he reminded me that he had an open relationship and that they routinely invited attractive women into their world.
OK, we get it. You andGWNC are hotties, but you are pissing off some poster I never heard of with your insistence on mentioning it and I think you should care more about his feelings.

Less (plus, you still haven't sent me pics to prove it) inSF
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:57 PM   #8998
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Quote:
Originally posted by fufu
the poor flight attendant informed me that they had tried everything to dissipate the smell, even using that well-known remedy of pouring bottles of beer down the toilet and flushing.
Wow. Who knew? Not me. Beer, huh? Although, being a, uh, prolific consumer of beer it seems that it might be considered an abuse of alcohol to put it into the toilet before it has been in your tummy. I bought those new side-of-the-toilet-perfumy-squirters for the bathrooms of the hubby and little man and find that they are potent enough to kill the odor of rotting carcass that sometimes eminates from the powder-rooms of my otherwise two favorite guys. Perhaps the airlines can take some of the money they save on food and buy some of those things. Better yet, tell people to shit before they leave home -- absent an illness a person should be able to make it through the flight without pooping (or is it just me?).

edited to note that I used "pooping" because it is fun to say, especially if you stress on the "oooooo" part. Like "oops, gotta poop.":mr:
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Last edited by ThrashersFan; 06-11-2003 at 04:00 PM..
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:58 PM   #8999
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MR Norton

Quote:
Originally posted by NotFromHere
I think you can safely say that we ALL liked Brad Pitt better.
I like Ed Norton better. But I'm weird like that...
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Old 06-11-2003, 03:59 PM   #9000
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I am completely petrified of flying in the best-case scenario, am on my first flight since 9/11, and we hit severe turbulence. The woman behind me starts shrieking "OH MY GOD, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!" over and over and over. This did not help my peace of mind.

I was proud that I was prepared to meet my maker quietly with just a shot of whiskey for fortification, but if the plane hadn't suddenly stopped banging around and shut her up (as the flight attendants couldn't calm her down), I'd have had to go down dying with my fingers around her hysterical bitch throat.
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