Making a buck cleaning Lester's spittle trays on Sequels' 22-year old supermodel abs

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Surely there's a local most slutiest he could turn to.

I'm easing her into swinging.

If that fails, I'm thinking I may take up masturbating in my truck to Villanova students in "Juicy" sweatsuits at the train station.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Is this what my wife means when she says "I didn't ask for an HONEST ANSWER, I wanted you to say (insert white lie which would make her feel better)?"

Sebastian, it may shock you to know that there are actually men out there with different taste than yours, and they don't say things to pregnant women just to make them feel better.

An example - something other than pregnancy: I have very short hair. Some men love long hair and would only tell me they like my hair because they think it is a nice thing to do. However, there are men out there who love short hair - there are actually men who have a real thing for it, maybe not a fetish, but it is a turn-on for them. (maybe they dig the androgyny - I have no idea). Other men hate it. Different strokes.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Or it can be, possibly maybe not in your case, that the guy is so turned on by the thought of his virility that he wants to fuck the preggo. Per a former coworker whose husband wanted to fuck her all the time when she was pregnant, and she hated it, plus an interpretation of the jackass husband's overall personality.

Isn't the more virile thing to do to go impregnate other women?

But, yeh, there may be other, less healthy preggo fixations than my own.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
http://planetpreterist.com/modules.p...print&sid=2415

• We're convinced that if we have children, we're going to do everything in our power to make them gay. Like maybe drinking a lot of extra soy milk while she's pregnant

If I had a gay daughter, I wouldn't mind, so long as she was an attractive lipstick lesbian. If I got Melissa Etheridge or Mary Cheney, I'd be fucking pissed. I do not want to realize at Xmas dinner that my little girl and I have the same haircut.

If I had a gay son, I'd prefer he be utterly flaming. If you're going to do something, don't half ass it. I'd hate to have one of those normal gay sons (like the hair guy in Queer Eye) who'd seem so straight that I'd perpetually be asking him "You sure you don't dig chicks?" after my fourth vodka.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
If I had a gay daughter, I wouldn't mind, so long as she was an attractive lipstick lesbian. If I got Melissa Etheridge or Mary Cheney, I'd be fucking pissed. I do not want to realize at Xmas dinner that my little girl and I have the same haircut.

If I had a gay son, I'd prefer he be utterly flaming. If you're going to do something, don't half ass it. I'd hate to have one of those normal gay sons (like the hair guy in Queer Eye) who'd seem so straight that I'd perpetually be asking him "You sure you don't dig chicks?" after my fourth vodka.

You're a girl pretending to be a guy?

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
If I had a gay son, I'd prefer he be utterly flaming. If you're going to do something, don't half ass it.

. . .

If I had a gay daughter, I wouldn't mind, so long as she was an attractive lipstick lesbian.

Wow. Usually you aren't quite this glaringly inconsistent. I'm sort of impressed.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Is this what my wife means when she says "I didn't ask for an HONEST ANSWER, I wanted you to say (insert white lie which would make her feel better)?"

I'm realizing more and more that I live in a far too literal world. If I ask my wife if my new haircut looks good, I expect her to honestly reply. Where else will I get solid criticism, except here maybe...

Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass. --Cordelia Chase, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, circa 1999. Sebastian Dangerfield, 2005

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Wow. Usually you aren't quite this glaringly inconsistent. I'm sort of impressed.

Thank you.

I find reverence for consistency to be among the most loathesome of our culture's bizarre fixations.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Is this what my wife means when she says "I didn't ask for an HONEST ANSWER, I wanted you to say (insert white lie which would make her feel better)?"

I'm realizing more and more that I live in a far too literal world. If I ask my wife if my new haircut looks good, I expect her to honestly reply. Where else will I get solid criticism, except here maybe...

You (and I) would make terrible salemen.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Thank you.

I find reverence for consistency to be among the most loathesome of our culture's bizarre fixations.

In your anthropological research, which culture's flexibility best matches your own?

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Wow. Usually you aren't quite this glaringly inconsistent. I'm sort of impressed.

I think it's consistent. He would like both his gay son and gay daughter to look like chicks. Perfectly consistent.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Thank you.

I find reverence for consistency to be among the most loathesome of our culture's bizarre fixations.

Well, you just make me think that you really believe in doing things half-assed.

I'm trying to figure out if MR can lick his wife's ass when he's on top in 69. And, the reason many women may not like lying on their backs while performing oral sex is that lying on your back with someone pushing into your mouth is, unless the penised one is quite careful and/or familiar with acceptable depth, the functional equivalent of shoving someone's head up and down a la RT's erstwhile partner.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
If I had a gay son, I'd prefer he be utterly flaming. If you're going to do something, don't half ass it. I'd hate to have one of those normal gay sons (like the hair guy in Queer Eye) who'd seem so straight that I'd perpetually be asking him "You sure you don't dig chicks?" after my fourth vodka.

1. I love my dead, gay son!

2. The hair guy is not the "normal" gay son. There is no doubt that he is gay. The food guy is the one that could pass.

TM

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
You (and I) would make terrible salemen.

Oh, thats not true. Do you litigate? If so, you're a salesman. Or a failure.

I think we'd both do exceptionally well. People like us have trouble lying to family and friends. But I have no trouble lying to anyone else. I won't lie to you until I either (a) develop a dislike for you or (b) realize you're lying to me. Then I'll lie all the fucking time to you, about shit I don't even need to lie about. Hell, I'll do it just for laugh. Lying to pricks is a mental way of punching them in the teeth. Its a complete lack of respect. If you can work that dichotomy in your personality, you can eembellish and twist the truth as it it needs to be twisted in sales....

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Well, you just make me think that you really believe in doing things half-assed.

I'm trying to figure out if MR can lick his wife's ass when he's on top in 69. And, the reason many women may not like lying on their backs while performing oral sex is that lying on your back with someone pushing into your mouth is, unless the penised one is quite careful and/or familiar with acceptable depth, the functional equivalent of shoving someone's head up and down a la RT's erstwhile partner.

Does his wife have hip dysplasia? Or was that his German Shepherd?