Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by evenodds
Okay, what is the biggest difference older and younger you've dated?

And what's the age difference now?

Oldest guy was 15 years older. That squicked me out and didn't last beyond a date (does it count then?). Youngest guy was 12 years younger. It was definitely a physical fling. The sex was awesome. Currently, it's a 9 year difference with me being older. Initially I was bothered by it and didn't agree to date him for 8 months. I finally gave in and we've been together ever since (over a year).

[zakoh02]

Originally posted by evenodds
Okay, what is the biggest difference older and younger you've dated?

And what's the age difference now?

I am 28 and currently dating someone who is 38 (does it count that he looks early 30s? No gray armpit hair, etc., in better shape than I am). Speaking personally, I agree with Paigow. There is something very comforting and fatherly about him. I learn from him, his life experiences, etc. and I found it to be arousing as hell. Younger guys (and those my age) just do not compare. BTW, I am not estranged from my father, but I am the product of a divorce (lived with Mom and Stepdad, saw Dad and Stepmom every other weekend). It could very well be that the attraction to older guys is made stronger by the fact that I didn't live with my biological father. I don't think we would give Paigow the willies walking down the street, but I do think her theory has merit.

Zak

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
So, in your world, at what age does someone become a consenting adult?

I agree that there is a squick line for everyone re older-younger relationships. I just don't see how 10 years is a big deal. Hell, even if it's a 30 year difference, I don't really care and don't particularly think it's a de facto mommy or daddy issue for the younger or perv issue for the older. If they are both into it, why should it bother you?

TM

Its more of a sniff test than a bright line to borrow from law school. Like, one of the guys I was out with the night I got dosed at the SKy bar- he was into his 18 yo phase bc they had better bodies (I asked) and he was like 29 or so. That squicked. A 36 yo guy and a 27 yo girl would not really squick me, but it would raise questions if she seemed exclusivley into guys at least a decade older. I am thinking os someone in particular and she is alienated from her dad.

it isnt always a pervo or looking for daddy thing by any means, but sometimes it is. you cant say it never is. an ex of mine dated a woman almost a decade older (she was in forties) and I always didnt understand how he could find her physically appealing when he could go much younger without hitting jailbait territory. I always wondered if it had something to do with the fact that his mom died when he was six. Of course, it might have been that she owned a house and offered stability to an unstable guy, but how different is that really? Or it might have just been plain old attraction. I think she ultimately decided he was too young for her.

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by purse junkie
Because you'd have to be a fucking idiot to think that issues of gender and power don't enter into hetero relationships with massive age differences--which, not coincidentally, usually means older man-younger woman. (And for older women, the age difference in my observation tends not be as large, but is certainly viewed as a bigger deal.)

I've got news for you. There are gender issues in ALL hetero relationships. Some couples handle it. Others don't. And whether or not there gender or power issues is pointless because consenting adults are consenting adults. Hell, some women actually WANT that power dynamic (as do some men -- I know a guy who can't date someone who doesn't control his every decision and he often dates older women. and yez, he's pathetic).

AS for the older women type relationship age difference, it doesn't happen as often, true. But I've seen some old ass women with some young guys that were clearly gigglin' it up.

Originally posted by purse junkie
Not bitter,you ass--it doesn't affect me personally

You had me fooled (and to preempt, yeah that ain't hard to do).

Originally posted by purse junkie and I wish even you true happiness with whatever jailbait or sugar mommy you hook up with--just not blind.

I wish. Unfortunately, any jailbait chickadee or sugar mommy would have to be blind to give me some play.

TM

[i]

AS for the older women type relationship age difference, it doesn't happen as often, true. But I've seen some old ass women with some young guys that were clearly gigglin' it up.


TM

This reminds me of something my closest guy friend said. When he was maybe 28? he dated a woman late thirities early forties. WHenI asked why he was into it (bc apprently I am completely nosy and always ask peopel why, but this is why my world view and observations are just so socially scientifically valid) he said he wanted to see her lingerie collection and wanted to do the mink coat with nothing on underneath. Apparently the younger gals cant offer this. It seemed she had an outstanding toy collection. And he referred to her as his deevorsay. Safe to say it was a sex thing.

[Anne Elk]

I like hats. Under the right circumstances they can be a fun fashion accessory. But........

[Atticus Grinch]

Originally posted by Anne Elk

He should wipe that stupid grin off his face. He hasn't done anything that anyone with £250 and a total lack of pride couldn't accomplish in twenty minutes.

[evenodds]

From the Times, a review of the Bonnaroo music festival that sold 80,000 tickets this year with no media coverage or advertising.

CRITIC'S NOTEBOOK
A Festival to Make Deadheads Grateful
By BEN RATLIFF

MANCHESTER, Tenn., June 15 — Music fans at rock festivals are, by and large, abused by sound, security, visibility, parking, aggressive advertising and ugly surroundings. But the organizers of the Bonnaroo festival — built on jam-band rock and expanding that genre beyond recognition — are aiming much higher.

The intelligence of the operation, on a 600-acre cow farm here, an hour south of Nashville, begins with the wide scope of the music. At 5 p.m. on Friday Lucinda Williams was playing country ballads in slow tempos with her jewel of a four-piece band, in front of a crowd baking in the sun around small mud puddles.

Farther to the north the saxophonist Joshua Redman was stalking a different stage, combining a language of stop-and-go rhythm-and-blues riffs and fluid bebop with his new trio. In a small, dark tent with overhead projections, Kid Koala, the turntablist, manipulated watery recorded phrases over a kaleidoscopic funk mishmash. Farther east, Tortoise, the instrumental quintet from Chicago whose members keep swapping instruments during sets, finished up in another tent, building up layers of slack jazz funk.

This is mostly a festival of backpackers: the world of peaceful collegiate rebellion. Much of it descends from Grateful Dead audience culture; the Dead in fact headlined the final night of Bonnaroo this year and last year. You could theorize that the band provides the logic of the programming: break down the Grateful Dead into its components, follow those aesthetic side roads, and you get Bonnaroo.

Full text: http://www.nytimes.com/2003/06/17/ar...ONN.html?8hpib

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
A 34 yo old woman is an adult who knows hersels and her body and is past that whole newly on her own. eating disorder, who am I , preorgasmic or whatever inexperience may apply...

How in the hell is any woman "preorgasmic" past the age of 19?
Between men and vibrators and just plain old TCB, how in the hell can any woman manage NOT to find out how to reach orgasm?

I don't think I've ever dated a girl who hadn't previously had an orgasm or didn't know how to reach orgasm. This alleged preorgasmic individual to whom you allude obviously has niether fingers nor curiosity.

S(if you haven't managed to get off by 20, I suggest you consult a medical text and locate your clitoris)D

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Anne Elk
I like hats. Under the right circumstances they can be a fun fashion accessory. But........

Wasn't she in Adaptation?

[Shape Shifter]

http://www.fbi.gov/ucr/cius_02/02prelimannual.pdf

(Spree: crime stats, by city, from the FBI)

[ABBAKiss]

True Springer-esque story:

Mr. Kiss's friend ("C") sent to Germany with Army in late 1990s. Understanding with girlfriend ("V") that no one dates other people--they are committed to each other. V goes hunting with her dad and dad's equally old friend. V fucks dad's friend while drunk. V becomes pregnant with twins. Dad's friend skips town. C FORGIVES V, MARRIES HER, AND RAISES THE TWINS.

I need new friends.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
This reminds me of something my closest guy friend said. When he was maybe 28? he dated a woman late thirities early forties. WHenI asked why he was into it (bc apprently I am completely nosy and always ask peopel why, but this is why my world view and observations are just so socially scientifically valid) he said he wanted to see her lingerie collection and wanted to do the mink coat with nothing on underneath. Apparently the younger gals cant offer this. It seemed she had an outstanding toy collection. And he referred to her as his deevorsay. Safe to say it was a sex thing.

I casually saw a couple 23 year olds and a 33 year old when I was a 23 year old in law school. I cannot impress upon you just how much better in the sack the 33 year old was. There was simply no comparison. Yes, its a sex thing. Its hard to find a 23-26 year old chick with the confidence of a 30+ divorcee. Women who aren't shy about how they like it are a huge turn on.

By the way, everything is a "sex thing". What else runs the planet? Money? Fuck no. Money is just something that allows ugly guys to get laid.

S(100% Freudian)D

[ThrashersFan]

Originally posted by evenodds
Okay, what is the biggest difference older and younger you've dated?

And what's the age difference now?

When I was 14 I dated a guy who was 25 -- and somehow managed to retain my virginity. He had to be fucking other people and was scared to death of my father so staying chaste wasn't too hard. For me, the relationship brought mobility (he had a car, of course) and booze. For him, I think it was sort of a "catch the only decent looking not totally psycho chick in the alternative scene." Oh well, I dumped him after about a year (hey, I was a kid) and he tried to kill me.

Now, my hubby is just shy of 2 years younger than I am. My first husband was 3 years older.

edited to add that current husband is youngest (in relation to my age) that I have ever been with.

[MisterEbola]

Originally posted by Shape Shifter
http://www.fbi.gov/ucr/cius_02/02prelimannual.pdf

(Spree: crime stats, by city, from the FBI)

Lovely. Little DC with 500,000 people had 264 (up 33 from 2001)murders. Philadelphia, with about 2,000,000 people, had 288.