Fashionistas you have arrived 3-25-03 - 10-3-03

What I love about this post is that it purports to be the views of a wisened older experienced man (notwithstanding the fact that this is a man that is proud of the fact that he cannot commit to an intimate relationship) and then the signature says "boogers".

Exactly.

Originally posted by LessinSF
I have "dated" women with up to a 12 year difference younger (31 to 19 when we met and 36 to 25 when I see her now) and 8 years older (30 to 38), and most of the generalizations expressed here are just that - something with an element of truth, but exceptions abound.

I couldn't date most college age girls for any length of time now because the cultural differences interfere - different music (though not as bad as most my age), different ideas of whether a big ugly tat across the entire small of her back is attractive, different drugs (give me coke and mushrooms, not meth and extacy) - and because of the level of maturity and life experiences. That said, I have met some over the years and continue to do so. A 21-year old I know through a political group has dated a friend of mine, and I would date her in a second - incredibly mature, intelligent, and self-confident.

Moreover, it is a no-brainer that the eye-candy is better on hot younger women. This is offset, however, by my continuing experience that the next generation is flabbier and wears unflattering fashions. I still don't know whether they are just fatter with more bad body art, or whether the thrity-something women are trying harder to look good. It is also true that older women are more comfortable with their sexuality, their bodies, knowing what they want and asking for it, and less hung-up about what their friends think and whether their number is going too high. On the other hand, I am finding that that is changing too. The next generation seems to have healthier attitudes towards sex that ours, because they grew up with porn as mainstream instead of AIDS and Nancy Reagan.

The upshot is I don't think dating up or down in age neccessarily means there are psychological issues, but I do think that women who get as pissy about it as purse junkie have their own issues. Face it - the younger ones are probably more attractive than you and definitely more fun to hang out with (at least based upon your uptight reaction here).

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
We are assuming they are dating men their own age, yes?




You are so funny, the way you pretend to know nothing about women!



Sebby, dear, fire up those synapses and think about your two posts in tandem. Maybe the second post could help you answer the question posed in the first?

RP,

Help a doddering fool with a broken sarcasm meter like myself out a bit... Are you saying the 33 year old was better than the 23 year olds because she'd had orgasms while the 23 year olds hadn't? If that's what you're saying, (a) I don't buy it and (b) the reason the 33 year old was better was because she had so much fucking confidence. Hell, she dominated. I played as aggressively as I knew she wanted, but in the end, she was leading and I was following.

Every chick at any age can have an orgams with a man if she's willing to tell him what to do. Sex is only really fun if you give up the fear of being embarrassed. Once a chick's been divirced or hit 30 single, she's passed being embarrassed, so she'll have more orgasms regularly. HOWEVER, there's no reason a chick at 23 shouldn't have just as many orgasms. Why is 30 the barrier age for sexual confidence for chicks? That's something I'll never get. As far as I'm concerned, getting an orgasm far outweighs any embarrassment that may be occasioned in the process.

S(I'd wear a clown suit to bed if I knew it guranteed phenomenal sex)D

Originally posted by ThrashersFan
Assuming that she is happy with her appearance and does not want to change (hey, one person's shit is another person's GQ), tell her to keep trying and re-evaluate her expectations. I am not saying that she should seek relationships through the prison pen-pal system, but she should start looking behind the outward appearances...

This is good stuff. Her standards are probably too high, both career-wise and looks wise for a guy. I should add that due to a series of crappy job situations (not her fault), she is stuck temping as some sort of a clerk right now so money is also an issue to some degree. Wow - she really sounds like a catch now, huh? Good advice though, TF. Not at all crabby

-TL

[Mister_Ruysbroeck]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Sex is only really fun if you give up the fear of being embarrassed.

There is a ton of truth in that statment for women AND men.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
What I love about this post is that it purports to be the views of a wisened older experienced man ...

Paigow, forgive me for being a timmy, but there is no such word as "wisened." Given your relationship with Less on the Board, I assume that you did not mean wise. Rather, did you mean wizened, as in "dried, shrunken, and wrinkled as a result of aging or of failing vitality" ?

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Paigow, forgive me for being a timmy, but there is no such word as "wisened." Given your relationship with Less on the Board, I assume that you did not mean wise. Rather, did you mean wizened, as in "dried, shrunken, and wrinkled as a result of aging or of failing vitality" ?

That was paigowspeak. A combination of the two things. Note the word "purports" for the "wise" definition, but I wanted to leave it ambiguous or at least to have a whiff of dried, shrunken and wrinkled , like Benny Hill's sidekick.

See? Misunderstood genius.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
See? Misunderstood genius.

Actually, the point of my post was that I did understand you. Don't be so literal.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by TexLex
Are you volunteering?

-TL

Mrs. Hand says no... I was thinking of some of the (other?) FB Man-ho's...

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
RP,

Help a doddering fool with a broken sarcasm meter like myself out a bit... Are you saying the 33 year old was better than the 23 year olds because she'd had orgasms while the 23 year olds hadn't?

No. Cause-effect, not effect-cause.

.... the reason the 33 year old was better was because she had so much fucking confidence.

Dingdingdingdingding!!!

And 30 seems a wee bit late for the confidence thing.

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
Mrs. Hand says no... I was thinking of some of the (other?) FB Man-ho's...

Not even to help a fellow FBer out? Man, she sure keeps you on a short leash. -TL

[MisterEbola]

Originally posted by TexLex

On an unrelated note, I have a friend who at 30 has had sex only once (yes - once, you read that right) - and that was last year on a catch and release mission.

Sounds like a perfect candidate for Coup_d'skek.

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by TexLex
For example, I have commented that she looks better with contacts, but she still wears glasses which make her eyes look teeny and she wears um, old fat-lady secretary/teacher* clothes. I tried taking her shopping, but she gravitates to clothes that make her look older (and fatter) than she is. Any (relatively tactful!) advice or is she doomed to be an old maid?

-TL

Re-watch the Marcia/Frumpy Girl episode of the Brady Bunch (honest!) where she transforms her bespectacled pal. Of course, Frumpy then became more popular than Marcia, and much hair-tossing and hand-wringing ensued, but it will provide useful instruction. The show is the font of all such wisdom.

P("Mom always said, don't play ball in the house")J

[evenodds]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
And 30 seems a wee bit late for the confidence thing.

I don't think it's confidence. I think it's experience. I was orgasmic at 20, but not multiple orgasmic until 24. Some things just need an experienced hand.

Regardless, I would say most women have their sexual shit together by 28, if not earlier.

Even(shepherded several 26 yo women through the adult book store and toy section)Odds

[ThurgreedMarshall]

Originally posted by TexLex
Any (relatively tactful!) advice or is she doomed to be an old maid?

Take her shopping with you, pick out some clothes for her and when she's trying them on, break her glasses. And when she's groping around for you, leave the store, change your phone number, move to another house and pretend like you never knew her.

Thurgreed(unless it's purse junkie, in which case she'll just track you down here anyway)Marshall

[purse junkie]

Originally posted by LessinSF
The upshot is I don't think dating up or down in age neccessarily means there are psychological issues, but I do think that women who get as pissy about it as purse junkie have their own issues.

I fucking wish even Thurgreed happiness with jailbait or a sugar mommy with total sincerity, despite the obvious truth that the vast majority of old guys who date only younger women are insecure youth-desperate sadsacks unable to handle actual interactions with grown-ups who can stand up to them, and you call me pissy? That, I thought, was Mother Theresa nice of me.