Fashion Board 1-08-04 through 02-03-04

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by dtb
My brother and I tortured one babysitter by locking him (yes, him -- his name was Harlan; I think he's the only person I've ever met named Harlan) out of the house (under the ruse of playing hide-and-seek). He went home and got his mother to call us and give us a stern warning about letting Harlan back into the house.

We were cowed, of course, and let him back in.

I don't remember if we got in trouble or not.

I went to high school with a Harlan. Very nice guy.

I have a friend named Harley. He got four whole pages in Robb Walsh's book on Texas Barbeque. (Go to the Amazon link on the left and then look up "Legends of Texas Barbecue Cookbook: Recipes and Recollections from the Pit Bosses") He's won more barbeque competitions than anyone in the state, and he'll be at the World World Championship Bar-B-Que contest the weekend before the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo starts. He has a website where you can buy his world famous seasoning. He also builds fences for ranches.

We used to play with my dad's CB radio when we were kids and pretend we were Duke's of Hazzard. I always got to be Daisy, cuz I was the oldest. My sister didn't want to be Enos or Cooter or Roscoe or Boss Hogg or Uncle Jesse, so she was always Flash.

The most trouble I EVER got in when we were kids was the time that we were playing in the car after my dad left us for two minutes to pick something up in a store. Either my brother or I managed to get the car out of park and into neutral and the car started rolling. We'd seen lots of Duke's of Hazzard and knew what to do. We jumped out of the car and rolled away. We were congratulating ourselves for the daring escape when my dad ran up. We explained what happened (the car had stopped rolling maybe ten feet from a highway), and my dad got furious. Not for playing with the gear shift. Not for jumping out of a moving vehicle. FOR LEAVING OUR SISTERS IN THE CAR. We explained that we weren't sure that we could have gotten the one out of her car seat in time, and the other one was too chicken to jump. Somehow that didn't calm him down.

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Do you realize it when you kiss ass, or is it more like a reflex?

TM

I really only do it to annoy you. You seem to enjoy being annoyed.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall

Well, we'll see, won't we?

TM

Well yeah, but that takes all of the fun out of arguing about it.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by notcasesensitive
My sister was hateful to one of our babysitters and made her cry. Something to do with eating stale bread, but I don't recall exactly.

I do recall making our babysitter drag us into the bedroom by our legs and then running back out to the living room and making her do it again (and again, and again). What fun!

One of my babysitters had her boyfriend over and decided that the only way to get my sister to stop annoying her was to give her the keys to my parent's car to take a spin. She was 12. She drove the car through two of our neighbor's yards and into a tree. At 8 years old, I found this highly entertaining.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
One of my babysitters had her boyfriend over and decided that the only way to get my sister to stop annoying her was to give her the keys to my parent's car to take a spin. She was 12. She drove the car through two of our neighbor's yards and into a tree. At 8 years old, I found this highly entertaining.

Though stoned, my babysitters were competent and did not endanger our lives or the lives of others.

[baltassoc]

Originally posted by str8outavannuys
First baseman, mid-market major league baseball team.

The Orioles may be able to set you up.

Aw, screw it, make me a starting pitcher.

Okay, we need a couple of those, too. The commute wouldn't be too bad; it'd be outside of rush hour.

Edited to add: damnit! This Lesbian bookcover thing has got to stop, Str8. I thought it was odd that leagl wanted to be a first baseman (she always struck me as more of a middle infielder). Scratch the bit about the commute. The job offer still stands.

[spookyfish]

Originally posted by baltassoc
The commute wouldn't be too bad; it'd be outside of rush hour.

Which, in Baltimore, starts around the fourth inning.

[Replaced_Texan]

Originally posted by Did you just call me Coltrane?
One of my babysitters had her boyfriend over and decided that the only way to get my sister to stop annoying her was to give her the keys to my parent's car to take a spin. She was 12. She drove the car through two of our neighbor's yards and into a tree. At 8 years old, I found this highly entertaining.

I don't really remember babysitters. One of my dad's guiding joys in being a parent was making his kids do work. ("I don't need to hire movers, I have four kids!" "I don't need to hire lawn guys, I have four kids!" etc.) So as soon as I was old enough to be able to call the pager, they left me to take care of my sibs. I think I was nine. The weekend that I turned 16 and got my drivers' license, my parents left town. I think they probably spent 50 percent of their weekends out of town on their own after that.

My youngest sister learned to party very, very young.

[idle acts]

Originally posted by evenodds
Since today's posts are less interesting than Paigow's actual job, here is a job-related poll:

If you could have any job (with lack of talent or experience being no bar to success), what would you choose?

Heiress

[Greedy,Greedy,Greedy]

Originally posted by idle acts
Heiress

What, and spend all those years waiting for your parents to kick and currying favor with your trustees? No thank you.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by idle acts
Heiress

Who has already inherited. Or who has an irrevocable trust already. One that doesn't impose any responsibilities or anything.

Otherwise, the sucking up would be unbearable.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
Why don't you just wear the shorts and see how fast you become Daisy?

TM

This is nice. Where were you 25 years ago?

(although 25 years ago you would have probably concurred in the uncle Jesse assessment, bee-stung lips* notwithstanding).

*no one has ever said this to me. I'm positively basking.

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Though stoned, my babysitters were competent and did not endanger our lives or the lives of others.

Damn spookyfish for making the joke first.

I only remember the existence of one teenage babysitter, but cannot remember her distinctly. My parents left us unattended sometimes. My brother (5 years older) was the responsible type; nevertheless, there were a few occasions where the furniture suffered for lack of adult supervision.

I did a lot of babysitting as a teen. I started sitting for these two kids when she was 7 and he was 10; by the time he was 13 -- too old for a sitter but too young to be left unsupervised, let alone look after his sister -- I was banking a substantial combat pay differential. Between this kid and his friends, who came over to hang out and swim in the pool, I fought off more gropes in one summer than I did in four years of college.

[Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)]

Originally posted by Replaced_Texan
I don't really remember babysitters.

The only one I remember who did anything notable was the one who would yell "Come back here so I can spank you." Yeah. that works. Unless you're a partner.

[Pretty Little Flower]

[i]Originally posted by ltl/fb[?i]
I think the majority of my babysitters when I was younger were probably stoned the whole time.

*********************************

Originally posted by spookyfish
I sense a cause/effect relationship in there somewhere.

Very perceptive. I think the "stoned" effect was probably caused by the smoking of marijuana.