Removing the feeding tube from our aging hipster plaid pants

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
Got big tits?

Not bad, but the line of superfluous nipples kinda wrecked the experience.

[Diane_Keaton]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
For those of you that are apartment-dwellers, do you put on a show for your neighbours or do you lower your blinds?

Put on a show. I look good enough naked that I'm not embarrased if passersbys cop a glance, but not so hot that they'd come back to stalk me every night like a movie-star stalker. Then again, YMMV.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Its never good to be naked when you're a guy. Shits always getting in the way. I had to run downstairs to put laundry in the dryer naked yesterday. Your dick flips back and forth the whole time... annoying. I don't know how the hell anyone could run around with huge breasts. Or be really really heavy. I mean, doesn't all that giggling cause balance problems, sort of like a SUV on a sharp turn. Do really heavy people have trouble slowing down the same way big trucks have trouble braking? It seems to me that once girth begins rolling in one direction, its difficult, if not impossible, to pivot or plant quickly and successful change direction. I could foresee an out of control fatty jogging smack into a wall, or toppling on a hairpin turn - sort of like a UHaal van.

U-hauls aren't floppy, and fats aren't allowed to wear tight clothing, so they flop no matter what. Which is to say, your analogies are less than pathetic.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Its never good to be naked when you're a guy. Shits always getting in the way. I had to run downstairs to put laundry in the dryer naked yesterday. Your dick flips back and forth the whole time... annoying. I don't know how the hell anyone could run around with huge breasts. Or be really really heavy. I mean, doesn't all that giggling cause balance problems, sort of like a SUV on a sharp turn. Do really heavy people have trouble slowing down the same way big trucks have trouble braking? It seems to me that once girth begins rolling in one direction, its difficult, if not impossible, to pivot or plant quickly and successful change direction. I could foresee an out of control fatty jogging smack into a wall, or toppling on a hairpin turn - sort of like a UHaal van.

Big trucks have bigger engines or they couldn't go fast- not so for fats. In fact, lots of fats have bum tickers* (bad engines) so they can't get moving like a truck can.

*not intended to describe anyone in particular

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
U-hauls aren't floppy, and fats aren't allowed to wear tight clothing, so they flop no matter what. Which is to say, your analogies are less than pathetic.

You have clearly never driven a UHaul.

Or been to Philadelphia.

[Sidd Finch]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Its never good to be naked when you're a guy. Shits always getting in the way. I had to run downstairs to put laundry in the dryer naked yesterday. Your dick flips back and forth the whole time... annoying. I don't know how the hell anyone could run around with huge breasts. Or be really really heavy. I mean, doesn't all that giggling cause balance problems, sort of like a SUV on a sharp turn. Do really heavy people have trouble slowing down the same way big trucks have trouble braking? It seems to me that once girth begins rolling in one direction, its difficult, if not impossible, to pivot or plant quickly and successful change direction. I could foresee an out of control fatty jogging smack into a wall, or toppling on a hairpin turn - sort of like a UHaal van.

When you post about stuff that annoys you like this, do you keep thinking about it for the rest of the day? Or do so many things infuriate you that it's like revolving door?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Hank Chinaski
bum tickers* (bad engines)

Thanks.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Sidd Finch
When you post about stuff that annoys you like this, do you keep thinking about it for the rest of the day? Or do so many things infuriate you that it's like revolving door?

More like one of those sushi conveyor belts. All I see are those egg things going by...

[Alex_de_Large]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
I have a friend who realized he was being watched jacking off by two chicks in the building next to his. He didn't stop - he finished for them. Not a terrifically attractive fellow, either.

The worst is seeing a relative naked. I saw my aunt once by accident. I didn't think much of it, but she was clearly freaked. Its a terrible thing. Really awkward.

Was that the retarded aunt? That is so hott.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Diane_Keaton
Put on a show. I look good enough naked that I'm not embarrased if passersbys cop a glance, but not so hot that they'd come back to stalk me every night like a movie-star stalker. Then again, YMMV.

Agreed, but the Chinese characters are soooo 1993.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I did not look at the line drawings, but both of the guys in questions sound like jerks. A MACHETE? I don't care if he has it "on hand" all the time for some dumbass reason, why is he threatening the current bf w/o even having talked to the ex-gf? JEEEEESUS.

That said, I want none of that going on without my knowledge/permission. Especially the normally non-anal toy going anally. You can get infections from that kind of thing if you don't know to clean very very carefully.

We need to talk. IM me.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
Was that the retarded aunt? That is so hott.

Jesus, no. The horror. The flashbacks...

"Sebastian, you are not getting any ice cream until you loofa your aunt's foot corns."

"But Grandmama, her towel... It's falling off again..."

"I'll put your Luke Skyywalker in the oven again..."

"Ok, ok..."

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
U-hauls aren't floppy.

Hauling a U-Haul is like catching a 5000 lb. tarpon with your car. They flop.

Only Bilmore will get this analogy.

[Alex_de_Large]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Jesus, no. The horror. The flashbacks...

"Sebastian, you are not getting any ice cream until you loofa your aunt's foot corns."

"But Grandmama, her towel... It's falling off again..."

"I'll put your Luke Skyywalker in the oven again..."

"Ok, ok..."

"The Dangerfield puts the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again."

[pony_trekker]

Originally posted by greatwhitenorthchick
For those of you that are apartment-dwellers, do you put on a show for your neighbours or do you lower your blinds?

Where do you live again?

But seriously, as I kid I was shameless. Then I got an invitation for a nudist camp for kids. I covered up.