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Old 09-13-2004, 08:36 PM   #1216
Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
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First Day of School

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Originally posted by bold_n_brazen
Of course, I am aware that I will never be able to part with any of it. I am such a sap.
Make two and save one for yourself.
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Old 09-13-2004, 09:12 PM   #1217
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First Day of School

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Originally posted by dtb
You know that movie about the dancing boy? (The British working-class kid who doesn't want to box, but to dance -- SHIT -- what is the name of that movie?)

Anyway, his charcter has a letter from his dead mother, who knew she was dying and wrote him a letter, part of which makes me tear up just thinking of it:

I'm proud to have known you, and proud you are mine.

SEE? My eyes are leaking.
My father's mother died of cancer when he was 16. She left a series of letters... one for the day his father remarried, one for the day he married, one for his future bride. They are each treasured family items.

I cannot imagine the fortitude it would take to write letters like that.
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Old 09-13-2004, 10:18 PM   #1218
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First Day of School

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Originally posted by dtb
You know that movie about the dancing boy?
Dance Billy, Dance!!!!

I can't think of the name, but you and BNB made me cry, damn you both.
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Old 09-13-2004, 10:49 PM   #1219
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Billy Elliott

That's the movie, you sentimental girls.

I'm getting a little verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic. Rhode Island is neither a road nor an island. Discuss.
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Old 09-13-2004, 10:53 PM   #1220
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I kept thinking Billy Madison, but was sure that wasn't it.
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Old 09-13-2004, 10:56 PM   #1221
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First Day of School

Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
You know that movie about the dancing boy? (The British working-class kid who doesn't want to box, but to dance -- SHIT -- what is the name of that movie?)

Anyway, his charcter has a letter from his dead mother, who knew she was dying and wrote him a letter, part of which makes me tear up just thinking of it:

I'm proud to have known you, and proud you are mine.

SEE? My eyes are leaking.
Billy Elliot.

While you are crying over little boys, rent My Life As A Dog. After his beautiful mother has died, the little boy replays over and over and over again in his mind the same short (and immature) memory of her. What he remembers (and plays over and over in his mind) is being on the beach with her and making her laugh really hard. It must have been his favorite memory of her and it is clear that he felt so proud that he could make her laugh. Tissues, please.

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Old 09-13-2004, 11:06 PM   #1222
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You Bitch! Stop making me cry - I'm hormonal enough without your help!
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Old 09-14-2004, 05:14 PM   #1223
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Your Kid's Piggy Bank Is Empty Day

  • Your Kid's Piggy Bank Is Empty Day!

    This is warning sign number two that he's addicted to the pot. Warning sign number one was when he was rude to his mother the other night. And warning sign number three is on its way. That's when he'll run through the living room naked, tearing at his own flesh, screaming "GET EM OFF ME! GET EM OFF ME!"

    Just so's you can kept an eye out, here are all of the warning signs that your kid's addicted to the pot:

    4) You find him in his little sister's room, forcing the barrel of a semi-automatic weapon in between her teeth (she's 9).

    5) Large black people on the front step.

    6) Unraked leaves.

    7) He can levitate.

    8) He is dead and there's nothing you can do about it now because you didn't heed the warning signs.

    9) He is fathering children left and right.

    10) He talks endlessly about how awesome the pot is and how it's the best thing ever.

    11) When you ask him if he wants to go play mini golf with you on the weekends he just doesn't seem all that interested.

    12) He has withdrawn roughly $78,000 from your bank account.

    13) Snot pours out of his nose like water from a spigot.

    If your kid exhibits any or all, or hell, even none, of these signs, he's probably addicted to the pot and you should beat him with a ring of keys until he's better.

    Happy Your Kid's Piggy Bank Is Empty Day!

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Old 09-14-2004, 11:28 PM   #1224
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First Day of School

Quote:
Originally posted by dtb
So I dropped my oldest boy off at his first day of kindergarten this morning, and I've got to say, my heart just about burst with happiness for him. He was so excited/nervous I just wanted to squish him with 1,000,000 or so hugs.

Sorry to be such a sap, but I'm still smiling (on the inside, anyway).
One day last week, I had to repeatedly smash the tenth grade Baguette's fingers with my steel-toed boots to make him let go of the door frame as I dropped him off for the first day of school. He yelled, and I yelled, and he screamed and swore and smacked the window and he threatened to run away, and I threatened to kill him, and, finally, fingers bloodied and smashed, he let go, and then he ran into the woods behind the school. We still haven't seen him.

I cried a small tear, too. Memories are precious things.
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Old 09-15-2004, 11:58 AM   #1225
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First Day of School

Quote:
Originally posted by bilmore
One day last week, I had to repeatedly smash the tenth grade Baguette's fingers with my steel-toed boots to make him let go of the door frame as I dropped him off for the first day of school. He yelled, and I yelled, and he screamed and swore and smacked the window and he threatened to run away, and I threatened to kill him, and, finally, fingers bloodied and smashed, he let go, and then he ran into the woods behind the school. We still haven't seen him.

I cried a small tear, too. Memories are precious things.
You wear steel-toed boots? Man, litigation in Minnesota must be tougher than I thought.
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Old 09-16-2004, 07:28 PM   #1226
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The Lexling took a step today. Despite my best efforts he's going to be a big boy soon. Sniff sniff...

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Old 09-16-2004, 09:39 PM   #1227
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Need to raise your blood pressure?

A discussion board for thems that are anti-children.
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Old 09-16-2004, 10:22 PM   #1228
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Need to raise your blood pressure?

Quote:
Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
A discussion board for thems that are anti-children.
I wonder how many are Fringey?
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Old 09-16-2004, 11:20 PM   #1229
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Need to raise your blood pressure?

Quote:
Originally posted by Tyrone Slothrop
A discussion board for thems that are anti-children.
Good gracious, those people are bitter and resentful. It's a good thing they're not breeding, but a good schtupping here and there might relax a few of them.
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Old 09-17-2004, 02:19 AM   #1230
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Need to raise your blood pressure?

Quote:
Originally posted by Flinty_McFlint
I wonder how many are Fringey?
I got schtupped last night so none.
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