A frolic in Cambodia

[NotFromHere]

LONDON - A new X-ray machine at London's Heathrow airport, which sees through passengers' clothes, has been attacked by civil liberties campaigners as a “voyeur's charter”. The machine uses low-level radiation to see through clothing, producing an anatomically detailed black and white image of the body underneath.

Randomly picked passengers are asked if they will volunteer to be scanned by the machine. (But I assume, mostly hot chicks).

But British civil rights group Liberty called the X-ray images unjustified and intrusive. “We obviously do not object to taking security measures, but I remain totally unconvinced that it is necessary,” a spokesman said. To justify the intrusion, the airport should show current detectors are inadequate, he added.

Traditional X-ray machines used to scan baggage have often struggled to identify plastic explosives, accidentally sounding alarms when detecting chocolate, cheese and peanut butter because of their similar density to the explosive Semtex.

This is news to me. I guess I'll have to remember not to bring the peanut butter to the airport next time.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
LONDON - A new X-ray machine at London's Heathrow airport, which sees through passengers' clothes, has been attacked by civil liberties campaigners as a “voyeur's charter”. The machine uses low-level radiation to see through clothing, producing an anatomically detailed black and white image of the body underneath.

Randomly picked passengers are asked if they will volunteer to be scanned by the machine. (But I assume, mostly hot chicks).

But British civil rights group Liberty called the X-ray images unjustified and intrusive. “We obviously do not object to taking security measures, but I remain totally unconvinced that it is necessary,” a spokesman said. To justify the intrusion, the airport should show current detectors are inadequate, he added.

Traditional X-ray machines used to scan baggage have often struggled to identify plastic explosives, accidentally sounding alarms when detecting chocolate, cheese and peanut butter because of their similar density to the explosive Semtex.

This is news to me. I guess I'll have to remember not to bring the peanut butter to the airport next time.

I'm going to have to stop using one of those dog toys that you fill with peanut butter as a buttplug.

[Alex_de_Large]

Think you're adventurous? Then you should compete in the World Testicle Cooking Contest.

"Serbian daily newspaper Glas Javnosti said the contest in the village of Savinac, close to town of Gornji Milanovac, was won by gourmet testicle chef Dejan Milovanovic from Belgrade.

His specialist dish prepared using testicles from a bull and a boar beat off challengers from around the world, who cooked their way through more than 20 kilos of prepared testicles."

spree: news story

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Alex_de_Large
Think you're adventurous? Then you should compete in the World Testicle Cooking Contest.

"Serbian daily newspaper Glas Javnosti said the contest in the village of Savinac, close to town of Gornji Milanovac, was won by gourmet testicle chef Dejan Milovanovic from Belgrade.

His specialist dish prepared using testicles from a bull and a boar beat off challengers from around the world, who cooked their way through more than 20 kilos of prepared testicles."

spree: news story

I'm not sure "beat off" should be used in a news story about a testicle contest.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by ThurgreedMarshall
This place is dead. I have nothing good, so I'll go with the following:

So, I'm in the elevator and it's the type that doesn't make that "boop" sound when you push the button. In fact, you don't even get to depress anything. It's like a flat sensor and it lights up around the edges. Very unsatisfying. And today, the button didn't even light up. I would like the sound. I would prefer if you could actually push a button. But give me something, man. No light even? Unacceptable.

POLL: What little thing like this gives you a small, strange sense of satisfaction?* Does anyone have any other examples like this?

TM

*(Yez, I see the joke. If you can't do better than the first joke that will surely pop into everyone's head, don't bother.)

This is going to sound really weird, but here goes. I love to chop onions; it's almost a zen thing for me. And when I've diced an onion and each little piece is almost identical in size, it really gives me a sense of accomplishment.

[baltassoc]

Originally posted by TexLex
On an unrelated note, empowered by the FB Home Depot Day advice, I installed my new kitchen light fixture this morning without killing anyone or even setting a minor fire. Wheee!!!

Not to pee in your cornflakes or anything, but usually faulty electrical work doesn't result in burning down the house and killing all the inhabitants until several months after installation, usually in the middle of the night.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Mmmm, Burger (C.J.)
Curiously, I figured the one person here who might wait in that line was you. Well, maybe AdL, too, but I think he's driving HIS NEW SAAB all over Bucks county.

As for the barber, 5 of 6 get what I'm asking when I say just a light trim, etc. etc. (and I'm more descriptive there than really anyone here cares to read). One guy doesn't. "English, man" doesn't seem to be a good approach.

Let the tip reflect your pleasure with the cut. The barbers talk and when the one guy figures out he gets less than the other guys, he'll pay more attention to what you want.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
Only because I'm required to wear it between my shoulder area and waist area (but not below the waist) and visible* at all times.




*It has some special symbols on it that are important warning information for coworkers.

Do not feed?

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by taxwonk
This is going to sound really weird, but here goes. I love to chop onions; it's almost a zen thing for me. And when I've diced an onion and each little piece is almost identical in size, it really gives me a sense of accomplishment.

Hello! And welcome to "The Anal Retentive Chef"! I'm Gene. Today, we're going to be making Pepper Steak. Now, you're going to need: one large bell pepper, three onions, exactly two inches in diameter, and 17 1/3 ounces of lean beef cut into 43 pieces. Okay, let's get started.

Now, I've already cut up my bell pepper. Look at this. [holds up bowl] Isn't this nice? See how all the pieces are the same size? People try to tell you that the secret to Pepper Steak is the seasoning - but we know differently, don't we? Uh-huh. It's getting all the pieces the same size. And that's what I've done here. Beauti ... uh-oh! [pulls out piece of pepper] This one's a little bigger than the rest, so we'll just discard that one. [pulls out another piece] And I don't think this little wrinkly one belongs in here. [pulls out another] And this ... well, I just don't like the look of that one at all. Alright, as a matter of fact, why don't we just start over and throw this out? [places bowl on counter]

And how do we throw things out? Okay. We take our paper towel, two pieces, unbroken, lay it out neatly, dump the refuse inside, arranged neatly ... [assembles the garbage] ... let's take these little nasties we separated earlier, put that back ... fold over carefully, making sure the corners are square ... and ... we take a piece of aluminum foil, and we place our refuse onto the foil, and fold over very carefully - this way, it won't leak onto the other garbage. Aluminum foil is such a miracle product! It's really an extraordinary product. Alright, and then we take a brown, paper sandwich bag ... [opens bag] ...place the refuse inside ... [drops it in] ...and ... oh no, this bag is torn.. [looks around] Well ... no, that's alright. We'll just fold over, and no one will see. We'll fold it over twice to be careful ... then we get our tape. [grabs tape, which is naturally covered in a cozy] And, we tape it shut - be very careful to center the tape on the bag. I like to keep my tape dispenser right here on the counter. There we go! [holds up bag] All ready for the trash. Now that's some garbage you can live with! [laughs]

Alright, I noticed some of you were admiring my tape dispenser cozy. Isn't that pretty? I made it myself, out of toothpicks, felt, plain old buckroom, a couple of pearl buttons and some eyelets. Now, isn't that better than looking at an old tape dispenser? I think so! Alright. Let's set this over here. [places tape dispenser onto the counter next to the sink, behind him]

Okay, where were we? We were going to dice the bell pepper. But ... oh ... [thinking] ... so, we're going to need our chopping block ..[pulls it out] But we can't put that down, because there's some water there from the bell pepper, so let's clean that up. As a matter of fact, this stovetop could use a lick and a promise while we're at it! So, how do we clean? We take our bucket ... but, first, let's remove the food products, because we don't want to get any caustic substances on the food, of course. [places food products on the counter next to the sink, behind him] Place these neatly in the background - this floor will be cleaned later.

Okay, so we're ready to clean. [pulls up mop bucket] We've got our glove, to protect us - we don't want to ruin our manicure. And we've got a clean white cloth, and abrasive cleanser - none of that non-abrasive cleanser for us, it's good old-fashioned cleanser. That'll get us started, I think I'll clean these cabinets while I'm at it. And, oh! Look at this. [points to the stove] Aluminum foil is filthy! I'm going to have to replace that. So, we might as well pull that up right now. [closing music starts up] I don't when I cleaned that up last, I'd hate to think. And, God knows what those mopboards look like. But! We start at the top, and clean down, so as not to drip ...

Announcer: This has been "Cooking With The Anal Retentive Chef".

[Flinty_McFlint]

Judge resigns after it was discovered she was in a porno.


All Rise

[NotFromHere]

So...Boston not going to be the top of the list for tourists?

BOSTON - The Big Dig highway project in downtown Boston is riddled with leaks dumping millions of gallons of water into the $14.6 billion tunnel system, according to an engineer hired to investigate the cause of a massive leak in September.

Fixing the hundreds of leaks could take up to 10 years, said Jack K. Lemley, a consultant hired by the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority to investigate the problem.

Is that going to fuck up traffic for awhile?

The Globe reported that as a result, retired judge Edward M. Ginsburg, appointed by the state last year to lead the team reviewing the project for overcharges by contractors, is talking to Attorney General Thomas F. Reilly about filing a lawsuit targeting Bechtel and Modern Continental, the contractor that built the wall section that leaked in September.

“I can honestly say we were shocked, shocked” Ginsburg said. “I can assure you we’re going to make sure there is a thorough investigation.”

[Anne Elk]

Originally posted by NotFromHere
Fixing the hundreds of leaks could take up to 10 years, said Jack K. Lemley, a consultant hired by the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority to investigate the problem.

Is that going to fuck up traffic for awhile?

Not to the point where anyone would notice.

[ltl/fb]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
[really funny, but scarily detailed, description of fake cooking show

That's a really detailed description, rp. Sounds like it comes from experience.

And really, it's all about the special secret ingredient in the sauce.

[greatwhitenorthchick]

Originally posted by robustpuppy
Hello! And welcome to "The Anal Retentive Chef"! I'm Gene. Today, we're going to be making Pepper Steak. Now, you're going to need: one large bell pepper, three onions, exactly two inches in diameter, and 17 1/3 ounces of lean beef cut into 43 pieces. Okay, let's get started.

Now, I've already cut up my bell pepper. Look at this. [holds up bowl] Isn't this nice? See how all the pieces are the same size? People try to tell you that the secret to Pepper Steak is the seasoning - but we know differently, don't we? Uh-huh. It's getting all the pieces the same size. And that's what I've done here. Beauti ... uh-oh! [pulls out piece of pepper] This one's a little bigger than the rest, so we'll just discard that one. [pulls out another piece] And I don't think this little wrinkly one belongs in here. [pulls out another] And this ... well, I just don't like the look of that one at all. Alright, as a matter of fact, why don't we just start over and throw this out? [places bowl on counter]

And how do we throw things out? Okay. We take our paper towel, two pieces, unbroken, lay it out neatly, dump the refuse inside, arranged neatly ... [assembles the garbage] ... let's take these little nasties we separated earlier, put that back ... fold over carefully, making sure the corners are square ... and ... we take a piece of aluminum foil, and we place our refuse onto the foil, and fold over very carefully - this way, it won't leak onto the other garbage. Aluminum foil is such a miracle product! It's really an extraordinary product. Alright, and then we take a brown, paper sandwich bag ... [opens bag] ...place the refuse inside ... [drops it in] ...and ... oh no, this bag is torn.. [looks around] Well ... no, that's alright. We'll just fold over, and no one will see. We'll fold it over twice to be careful ... then we get our tape. [grabs tape, which is naturally covered in a cozy] And, we tape it shut - be very careful to center the tape on the bag. I like to keep my tape dispenser right here on the counter. There we go! [holds up bag] All ready for the trash. Now that's some garbage you can live with! [laughs]

Alright, I noticed some of you were admiring my tape dispenser cozy. Isn't that pretty? I made it myself, out of toothpicks, felt, plain old buckroom, a couple of pearl buttons and some eyelets. Now, isn't that better than looking at an old tape dispenser? I think so! Alright. Let's set this over here. [places tape dispenser onto the counter next to the sink, behind him]

Okay, where were we? We were going to dice the bell pepper. But ... oh ... [thinking] ... so, we're going to need our chopping block ..[pulls it out] But we can't put that down, because there's some water there from the bell pepper, so let's clean that up. As a matter of fact, this stovetop could use a lick and a promise while we're at it! So, how do we clean? We take our bucket ... but, first, let's remove the food products, because we don't want to get any caustic substances on the food, of course. [places food products on the counter next to the sink, behind him] Place these neatly in the background - this floor will be cleaned later.

Okay, so we're ready to clean. [pulls up mop bucket] We've got our glove, to protect us - we don't want to ruin our manicure. And we've got a clean white cloth, and abrasive cleanser - none of that non-abrasive cleanser for us, it's good old-fashioned cleanser. That'll get us started, I think I'll clean these cabinets while I'm at it. And, oh! Look at this. [points to the stove] Aluminum foil is filthy! I'm going to have to replace that. So, we might as well pull that up right now. [closing music starts up] I don't when I cleaned that up last, I'd hate to think. And, God knows what those mopboards look like. But! We start at the top, and clean down, so as not to drip ...

Announcer: This has been "Cooking With The Anal Retentive Chef".

Perhaps he could compete in this competition:



(I miss Phil Hartman. Lesson that bears repeating: don't marry a stupid trigger-happy bitch)

[robustpuppy]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
That's a really detailed description, rp. Sounds like it comes from experience.

Ooh, that burns. Not as badly as anal chili would, I'm sure, but still.

(Seriously, do you know how much time it took to insert all the italics code around each bracketed description of the chef's physical movements? I didn't have to do it, I know, but if I hadn't, think how much more difficult the transcript would have been to read. No harm ever came from extra effort.)