Quote:
Originally Posted by sebastian_dangerfield
Narcissistic personality disorder is a recognized mental illness. A narcissist's disorder is that he is self-obsessed and does not care much for others.
Desire to acquire and wield power over others is not considered a mental illness.
Why?
Shouldn't it be one? If a narcissist has mental issues, surely a guy who, like your bosses, wants to exert power over others for no other reason than to remind them he has it, and to keep others somewhat in fear of him, has a much worse set of mental issues. The narcissist harms others by neglect or collaterally, by focusing exclusively on himself. The person who seeks power and uses it on others - even if just to remind them he has it and they don't (or so he thinks) - is actively imposing himself on others to their detriment or annoyance.
If I was having drinks with you and you said, "What do you like about work?" and I replied, "I like that I have power and can use it to control or intimidate others," you'd find an excuse to leave near immediately. You'd think me deeply, seriously flawed - probably sociopathic. And yet no one critiques people who desire and seek to flex or punch down with power. It's assumed this desire to have power and use it on others is a natural human behavior.
Am I wrong to suggest that to crave power shows extreme anti-social tendencies? And to use it on others with less power, even in the passive aggressive manner you cited, is a form of cruelty. Maybe I'm crazy, but I've always wanted to make people who were working for me happy and feeling a parity with me. The idea of, as you say, making people "stand on their hind legs for peanuts" is warped. Only a deeply sick mind would think that's a good way to treat underlings of any sort. I hate seeing people do that kind of shit to their pets.
YMMV, but I think we need to add "Power Craving" and "Use of Power on Others" as disorders in the DSM-IV.
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A few friends I have who have left described it as flat out mental illness. I only use that analogy as the squirrels seem to do it sua sponte because I can't throw them peanuts fast enough. I try to remind them that they don't have to do it but they are hungry.
The greatest compliment I ever got was from a paralegal who worked for us, but not directly for me but with whom I interacted on a number of projects.
She said, and I forgot the context "You always treat people as equals." One of my feel-good moments.
