Politics: Onward from New Hampshire

[Tyrone Slothrop]

With coverage of the Democratic debate like this, courtesy of [url=http://www.wonkette.com[/url], I don't need to watch:

• Debate Roundup: Twist and Shout
  Kucinich: Wants to "lay [his] hands" on America. As if we needed a reminder that he's single.
  Clark: Does not "blame" Bush for the 9/11 attacks, just thinks he "didn't do all he could have done to prevent them." We tried to convince our husband to see our affair this way.
  Edwards: Would like to remind you that, in addition to being the son of a mill worker, was born not far from here.
  Dean: Who's the guy with the neck? He sounds sort of familiar.
  Kerry: Takes credit only for the pretty legislation he's passed.
  Lieberman: The "experienced moderate" in the race. It's like being the tallest short man in the room. Ironically, he is the tallest short man in the room.
  Sharpton: Scores major points for disabusing Brokaw of the notion that the war on terrorism is being conducted against a bunch of black men in bow ties: "I assume when you say 'the Nation of Islam' you're talking about Islamic nations."
  Brokaw: Surprise winner in the pander-a-thon for showing us his pert, firm ass for the entire debate.