Happy Birthday, Preston Michael Spears Federline and other Certain Special Someones!

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Thought I woudl take a quick scan of some tv reviews and apparently the Ghost Whisperer isn't doing terribly smashingly.

From the SFCHRON

How else to explain Jennifer Love Hewitt in a rip-off of "Medium" called "Ghost Whisperer" on CBS? She talks to dead people. She also acts as if she's dead. And somebody clearly killed her hairstyle. None of that matters, however, as males and females, gays and straights, dogs and cats, grandparents, fish, etc., will only be able to stare at her breasts. No series in recent memory has put so much attention on a pair of breasts. It's laughably ridiculous. You can't escape them. Hewitt is in her nightgown half the time and then in shirts three sizes too small the other half. In one scene the strap of her shoulder bag prominently divides her breasts. If you can watch that scene without laughing, you're too desperate by half.

My guess is she can float through six episodes on those things. By this time next year, we'll be talking about her Playboy spread.

I'd go further and say she'll be a meth-addled skeleton with dried semen crusted to her lower lip, carrying herself with a just-been-gang-banged limp by 2007... BUT, I'm not sure she has the grey matter to enjoy drugs. I think she'll end up marrying that guy Brooke Burke just divorced and pump out a few brats. After she breast feeds and those things become Natl Geographic Aboriginal pictorial tits, she'll get massive janice Dickinson implants and make a comeback from the brink with a reality show about her and her fat, dim children. Episode One - JHL drives the Porsche through the marble Venus De milo in the front yard.

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by mmm3587
If this isn't slang for some sex act or drug use, I am disappointed.

Reverse blumpkin with shocker follow up.

[Flinty_McFlint]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
My guess is she can float through six episodes on those things. By this time next year, we'll be talking about her Playboy spread.

I'd go further and say she'll be a meth-addled skeleton with dried semen crusted to her lower lip, carrying herself with a just-been-gang-banged limp by 2007... BUT, I'm not sure she has the grey matter to enjoy drugs. I think she'll end up marrying that guy Brooke Burke just divorced and pump out a few brats. After she breast feeds and those things become Natl Geographic Aboriginal pictorial tits, she'll get massive janice Dickinson implants and make a comeback from the brink with a reality show about her and her fat, dim children. Episode One - JHL drives the Porsche through the marble Venus De milo in the front yard.

Confidential to Mr. Man:

Try not to leave any prints or dna.

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
You drink Chianti at art museum parties? I'm sure your spread collars go over big with the other patrons.

Chianti? Was it a guido artist? Was this South Philly?

[Hank Chinaski]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Thought I woudl take a quick scan of some tv reviews and apparently the Ghost Whisperer isn't doing terribly smashingly.

From the SFCHRON

How else to explain Jennifer Love Hewitt in a rip-off of "Medium" called "Ghost Whisperer" on CBS? She talks to dead people. She also acts as if she's dead. And somebody clearly killed her hairstyle. None of that matters, however, as males and females, gays and straights, dogs and cats, grandparents, fish, etc., will only be able to stare at her breasts. No series in recent memory has put so much attention on a pair of breasts. It's laughably ridiculous. You can't escape them. Hewitt is in her nightgown half the time and then in shirts three sizes too small the other half. In one scene the strap of her shoulder bag prominently divides her breasts. If you can watch that scene without laughing, you're too desperate by half.

By laughing, he means, like, after you're done, right?

[Gattigap]

"First you bend her this way, and you do the sex with her THIS way. Wait, let me show you by screwing my wife."

So sayeth David Cronenberg to Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello on the set of A History of Violence.

To hell with the theatrical release on this one. I'm waiting for the DVD extras.

Gattigap

Quite possibly the stupidest, most pointless and meaningless "headline" ever

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050927/...icole_kidman_1

Sebby, do you have an opinion on the library sciences?

[SlaveNoMore]

paigowprincess
...No series in recent memory has put so much attention on a pair of breasts.

How old is this reviewer, four? "Recent memory"? Does 12 seasons of "Baywatch" slip his mind?

Has he not seen an ad during football for "Stacked"?

Fucking Buffoon.

[SlaveNoMore]

Gattigap
"First you bend her this way, and you do the sex with her THIS way. Wait, let me show you by screwing my wife."

So sayeth David Cronenberg to Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello on the set of A History of Violence.

To hell with the theatrical release on this one. I'm waiting for the DVD extras.

Gattigap

How bizarre is it that Viggo sired a kid with Exene Cervenka?

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
Sebby, do you have an opinion on the library sciences?

Black arts. The Dewey Decimal system is a Byzantine code which serves no purpose but to keep shiftless, otherwise useless librarians in business, while fucking over the average library patron. It should have been scrapped years ago, but the lobbying arms of Barnes & Noble, Borders and Amazon spend millions to keep it because it drives so many customers to them.

[Did you just call me Coltrane?]

Originally posted by sebastian_dangerfield
My guess is she can float through six episodes on those things. By this time next year, we'll be talking about her Playboy spread.

I'd go further and say she'll be a meth-addled skeleton with dried semen crusted to her lower lip, carrying herself with a just-been-gang-banged limp by 2007... BUT, I'm not sure she has the grey matter to enjoy drugs. I think she'll end up marrying that guy Brooke Burke just divorced and pump out a few brats. After she breast feeds and those things become Natl Geographic Aboriginal pictorial tits, she'll get massive janice Dickinson implants and make a comeback from the brink with a reality show about her and her fat, dim children. Episode One - JHL drives the Porsche through the marble Venus De milo in the front yard.

[IMG]http://rds.yahoo.com/S=96062883/K=jennifer+love+hewitt/v=2/SID=e/l=IVS/SIG=12r1h4nhp/EXP=1128005309/*-http%3A//celebrity-exchange.com/celebs/photos49/jennifer-love-hewitt4.jpg[/IMG]

[dtb]

The fellas that I work with are trying to get on a health kick now that I've spent the last few weeks plying them with donuts. So, instead of eating donuts as today's breakfast supplement, they ordered pizza.

That was one righteous slice of pizza I just inhaled. Most excellent.

[Shape Shifter]

Buy a title.

[taxwonk]

Originally posted by Pretty Little Flower
Oops, sorry man. I'm sure you look totally hip in Dockers.

I gave up trying to look hip at about 35. Past 40, looking hip is equal to looking pathetic. It's like the ponytail on the bald dude in his 50s or the 40-something Mom at the mall wearing the same pair of Juicy sweatpants and cropped t-shirt as her 14 y.o. daughter.

I tend to go for two looks: classic or stylish. I'm not sure you'd find an example of either in Neverland, Peter.

[Replaced_Texan]

Our stats are way, way up lately. We're about to pass April and we have another couple of days of September to do. And August was just insane. Have we been talking that much?

Monthly Stats for 2005

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