Fashion Board 4-6-04 to 5-7-04

[sebastian_dangerfield]

Originally posted by sunnybunny
Nebraska senator Hagel (R) said US may have to reinstitute the draft. My question to y'all is this....if you are openly gay, can you avoid the draft?

This could have hysterical results. I can't even begin to imagine what the Army's "Gay test" would be like.

It takes "hung on one's own petard" to a new level. Lets see the Jesus Nuts dance around this one.

[leagleaze]

Originally posted by sunnybunny
More than the test, I'd love to hear the backpedaling logic that would be offered.

Heh. You know that is a very good point. Sometimes it is an effort not to laugh at some of the shit people come up with.

[sunnybunny]

Originally posted by Tyrone_Slothrop
tyrone asking about a handjob machine in response to sebby's rant about mini cooper drivers beign eurotrash

In all honesty, I know three people with minis:

(1) a plump happy female partner at my firm who wouldn't know cool if it hit her in the trunk of her mini.

(2) Wonk. Not eurotrash, not hipster, not any of the stuff you mentioned. He likes tax law, for god sake.

(3) Some 36-year-old 6'2" black dude who grew up in a project neighborhood who is married to a Peruvian immigrant and doesn't care what anyone thinks about him or his wife except for his two kids and probably doesn't even know what Eurotrash is.

I've yet to come up with one eurotrash dude or dudette I know who drives a mini.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by sunnybunny
I've yet to come up with one eurotrash dude or dudette I know who drives a mini.

Well, good thing you haven't been to Pennsylvania, because the hills are full of 'em!

Except and until they get smushed by the battalions of soccer moms in SUVs, of course. It's a Darwinian struggle.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Originally posted by Bad_Rich_Chic
Do you register for the draft when there is no draft? I vagely recall that you do, but I can't remember (never having had to do it).

If you're a guy and you want federal benefits of any kind (student loans, etc.) you have to register and certify repeatedly that you did on the applications. It's been that way as long as I can remember.

[Aloha Mr. Learned Hand]

Would be pretty funny if they had a test to see if you were gay at the Draft Board.

Given a choice of risking life and limb in heavy combat, leaving the country as a fugitive or kissing some guy, I think a surprising number of straight men would respond as Bill Murray and Harold Ramis did in "Stripes":

Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?
Murray: You mean like flaming? Or part time?
Recruiter: Well, it's a question we have to ask of all our new recruits.
Ramis: No, we're not homosexual, but we are willing to learn.

[john123]

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
Would be pretty funny if they had a test to see if you were gay at the Draft Board.

LOL! Right on!

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Aloha Mr. Learned Hand
Would be pretty funny if they had a test to see if you were gay at the Draft Board.

I would be curious about the test. Does admitting a single act mean you're out? M-M-F threesome? What if it's only blowjobs? Does it matter if you were pitching or catching? What about an openly gay person who is a virgin? I don't think a simple True or False will cut it.

I got my Shape Shafter in the mail yesterday, thank you. Went hom, turned on some Jenna Jameson and was sorely disappointed. Send the missus my condaleezas

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I got my Shape Shafter in the mail yesterday, thank you. Went hom, turned on some Jenna Jameson and was sorely disappointed. Send the missus my condaleezas

Jenna is certainly past her prime. Perhaps you should update your porn collection.

[Gattigap]

Originally posted by ltl/fb
I think SS owes us a review of the Sapphire Seductress (or Onyx Onanist, or whatever it was called). SS?

He would, but I hear SS is busy litigating a local, somewhat related case.

Sadly, there are no pictures of the Tiggler, because I'm having a hard time picturing how a tongue stud could vibrate. Is it battery powered? If so, how does one design the stud to be small enough?

And, SS, I'm sorry to hear about the scuffle at the depo. Did you land any good punches?

[Shape Shifter]

Originally posted by Gattigap
He would, but I hear SS is busy litigating a local, somewhat related case.

Sadly, there are no pictures of the Tiggler, because I'm having a hard time picturing how a tongue stud could vibrate. Is it battery powered? If so, how does one design the stud to be small enough?

And, SS, I'm sorry to hear about the scuffle at the depo. Did you land any good punches?

I can't wait for oral arguments.

[john123]

Originally posted by paigowprincess
I got my Shape Shafter in the mail yesterday, thank you. Went hom, turned on some Jenna Jameson and was sorely disappointed.

did you intend that pun?! If so, good one!

[john123]

Originally posted by paigowprincess

Is that the OUTline of Tom Cruise's head?